To refuse Hs attempt at sex at 6.30 on a week day morning when High School DC about to wake in their nearby rooms

[NobodysGirl]

I get up at 6.30 and get breakfast and stuff for DC to leave at 7.30 (High school), their alarm goes at 6.30 too and rarely they do saunter in if the door were unlocked- but even otherwise the rooms are all close by and they would be up and about and this is more embarrassing now that they are grown and would easily have guessed.

Found it disgusting and a turn off and annoyed with H

Especially as he knew I would have been willing after they had left for a lie in as we both wfh and have the whole place to ourselves and full privacy till late evening when they are back.

Is this a fetish that emerges in couples in 40s and 50s to pounce and try it on at inappropriate times? Does it keep men from getting bored to be risque than safe.

Not having it.

Its never 'unreasonable' to refuse sex with anyone if you don't want it.

Its pretty unreasonable to accuse him of developing a fetish, just because he woke up horny and thought you might be up for a quickie. Its also unreasonable to describe this as 'disgusting'. So what if the kids 'guessed' what you'd been up to? How do they think they came into being?

Is there a backstory here?

YANBU to decline sex at any time. But morning sex isn't a crime and if you fancied it one morning wouldn't hurt. The high-school kids shouldn't be waltzing in your room in the morning. So long as he wasn't a sulky brat about the rejection I dont think he's done anything wrong. Morning sex certainly isn't a fetish.

I sont see the big deal, just say you'd rather wait till kids have gone to school.

Is this a fetish that emerges in couples in 40s and 50s to pounce and try it on at inappropriate times? Does it keep men from getting bored to be risque than safe.

Weird question 😳

Not in my experience, no.

I'm struck by how loaded your language is. He wanted sex, you didn't, both perfectly reasonable. What's the big deal?

I'm sure lots of people will be along in a sec to tell you their stories about their early morning sex experiences OP

Teenage kids just walking in your bedroom without knocking ? Erm no

Wanting to have sex with your partner.. nothing wrong with that

Thinking it’s a “fetish” to have sex in the privacy of your own room, when there are other people in the house ? It’s is not

What an odd thing to be so uptight about

You can have sex or decline it whenever you want. As can he.

its pretty extreme to describe it as disgusting and possibly a fetish. Have you never wanted spontaneous early morning sex with someone you love?

as long as neither of you are being moody about it, I’d put it behind you.

Why would it be disgusting? He fancied it, you didn’t. Surely the time of day is irrelevant.

Your language is quite harsh and rude. Wanting intimacy in the morning is certainly not a fetish. Fair enough you didn't want it but behaving as your husband wanted something unnatural is not fair. Why exactly are you disgusted? How did you react?

Think you’re over reacting

It’s not a fetish. It’s an attempt from a DH to have some quick intimacy with his DW before the day begins.

have you told him you’d prefer to wait until you have the house to yourselves?

OP, you have a long thread currently running about your relationship with your husband who you describe as grumpy and always unhappy, and now this thread. Your marriage is over. Neither of you love or even really like each other.

😆

It’s hardly a fetish to wanting the morning. I only ever do it in the morning as we go to bed at different times. Oh and my DS is 18. I’m not going celibate because he’s grown up

I'm laughing to myself thinking about how fetish clubs might create a service that caters for this unnatural fetish of wanting to have sex with your spouse when you're both awake and in bed at the same time.

Why would sex with the person I presume you love be disgusting? Do you think he has a fetish?

This seems a very extreme reaction.

Team DH

I wanted ppl to weigh in on this morning incident on it's own ...without the background,,,,thanks

SO lots of ppl find it normal morning sex when kids are awake and about then and might be knocking on the door and guessing .....okay then

He did get defensive , sulky and angry but only when I asked if this was a new fetish angrily to not wait till they had left.

OP I thought it sounded like you really don't like the man from your OP, but that is fully justified, seeing your other thread.

You can choose a happy life and plan your future, free of this man.

Oh Christ! Just tell him you think he's a pervert and you absolutely do not desire sex with him.
How extreme 😢.

So in this situation, I was wrong then and not him....okay then

but the incident on it's own appears to have been deemed as me being unreasonable not him

No you weren't wrong not to want sex, neither was he though

Your reaction seems ott and very hostile.

I feel like the odd one out here, OP, and honestly, I can't believe the team DHs on this one. But sex in a house full of teens getting ready in the morning is not how I want to reach orgasm. Call us both crazy. I'm with you all the way, OP.