To refuse Hs attempt at sex at 6.30 on a week day morning when High School DC about to wake in their nearby rooms

[NobodysGirl]

I get up at 6.30 and get breakfast and stuff for DC to leave at 7.30 (High school), their alarm goes at 6.30 too and rarely they do saunter in if the door were unlocked- but even otherwise the rooms are all close by and they would be up and about and this is more embarrassing now that they are grown and would easily have guessed.

Found it disgusting and a turn off and annoyed with H

Especially as he knew I would have been willing after they had left for a lie in as we both wfh and have the whole place to ourselves and full privacy till late evening when they are back.

Is this a fetish that emerges in couples in 40s and 50s to pounce and try it on at inappropriate times? Does it keep men from getting bored to be risque than safe.

Not having it.

Well we talked more about consent and safe sex tbh. I have DDs though, I expressed that I hoped that they waited, and that they were in a loving relationship, but I'd rather they were safe and felt comfortable to come to me if they needed to rather than fear being in trouble for not being old enough.

There does not have to be a back story to not want your children to be listening to you having sex, or to not want to risk them walking in on you.

I don’t think it unreasonable, except I would not have actually, openly accused him of having a fetish.

(I do not think it impossible that he might like the thought of having them hear , but I would not say it because you cannot know that.)

Why not if it helps OP answer her questions?

That makes absolutely no sense!

Part of our job as parents is to teach our children about manners and etiquette, including knocking on a closed door and waiting for a response before entering.

Obviously there's way more going on here than just this morning's non incident.

But... If you think your children might walk in to your room even when the door is closed, why don't you just always lock it every night? One less thing to think about when you and your husband might be both in the mood at the same time. It shouldn't be that one of you has to get up and lock the door every time.

By the way, my kids are in their mid 20s and still call me Mommy sometimes. There's nothing wrong with that.

OP, having read the full thread, I think I understood what you were trying to express, of how you were feeling.… it’s been really interesting (and equally disturbing) reading some of the responses you’ve had. It’s been like a mini-exploration of society’s understanding (and blindness to) male entitlement, a revealing look into societal expectations and gender dynamics. The subtle and unsubtle misogynistic responses you have received ….posters not really seeing or able to comprehend the deeper issues that were coming up. You can really see the mechanics of why change is slow. Sometimes it’s worth looking deeper with curiosity, to see what we might find. We need to keep a lookout for male sexual entitlement, in its myriad representations and address it. Women and girls deserve faster social change. From the more harrowing threads we unfortunately see so often on mumsnet to the more “normalized” ones as well.

If your children walk in on you both having sex they will NEVER walk into your room without knocking EVER again!!! Ask me how I know! I was that teen!!!

husband or wife fancies a bit of nookie...tries it on like spouses do....you have sex or you don't.....it's not that deep

No me neither tbh and I wouldn’t want to do it in this situation however it’s still not wrong for the husband to want to do it. Disgusted is quite a strong emotion and it’s not a fetish

Ah, I love a bit of risky morning naughtiness!

My 17 year old has the room next to us.. Last year she said "so yeah, i always wear my headphones to bed. Seriously, gross; but I'm glad you guys love each other so much."

We are so much quieter now!!!

But I guess it comes down to your own comfort zone and levels of sexual engagement. Being AuDHD, I'm prone to throwing myself into anything without thinking it through, especially if it's going to set off dopamine and serotonin.

Either way, I guess I'm saying, don't be mad at him for wanting you, just verbalise that you're not comfortable with the teens around but you're up for it later :-) just tell him!

Early morning sex is my favourite, sets me up for the day.
Bedtime sex not so much, as I am tired.