A genuine or accidentally-on-purpose email sent by mistake?

[roses19837]

Yesterday I saw that DH received a what appears to be obviously an accidental email from a former, younger female employee. The email was addressed to a group, staring 'hi all,' and from what I could see, was all about writing content for a website. Nothing to do with what DH does. DH just left the email, didn't reply, and went back to his inbox. He never mentioned it to me, but why would he? A silly accidental email is no piece of news really...

This employee left the company after an internship with my DH's business last summer.

As a bit of background, most of DH's work was from home, so he didn't see this woman in person all that often.

I used to suspect that DH was a bit too chatty and familiar with this young woman, although he never contacted her inappropriately outside of work. I met her several times when I went with DH to the office, and he always seemed smily and enthralled with her and what she was saying, which I did have words with him about, and he did later tone this down.

I wonder whether this girl 'accidentally on purpose' sent this email, in an attempt to strike up a conversation with DH? If so, would it be worth me telling DH to block her? I did used to wonder whether she liked the attention he gave her before I had words with him (she seems like the kind of young woman who would like attention, always dressed immaculately and hair styled etc). I could of course just be overthinking this

He is an adult who can make his own decisions i would not tolerate being dictated to by my husband so wouldn't do it to him

I think you sound ever so slightly unhinged.

Would you really "tell" him to block someone? Would he do that to you?

No she has on purpose email every single person she knows hoping someone will use her, recommend etc. she’s done it to try and promote her business.

as a business owner I can not tell you the amount of emails I get from former work colleagues, people who had found me on LinkedIn etc who have special offers on or could really help boast my business profile!

she’s just changing her arm that someone needs her help. She won’t even know who see sent it too- it will have been a send to all thing

Unless the content this woman is asking for is erotic poetry, I think you can let this one go.

A group email about websites doesn't sound like the start of an illicit relationship.

Fucking hell OP, this is a lot. No, don't tell your husband to block an ex colleague because he found them charming and interesting.

He ignored it so I’d follow his lead if I were you.

You can’t actually be serious? Is there some background information you are leaving out?

Isn't it all a bit weird that you "saw" this email at all?

I think you have issues OP. I doubt this woman is one of them.

Your thought process on this is bonkers.

Please tell us the massive back story as to why you think / react this way?

She sent a group email. To a lot of people. About something your DH doesn't know about.
And you think that was her attempt to start a conversation with your DH?

You are overthinking however as you don’t trust him or her, it doesn’t matter what people say.

Do you normally poke through his work emails? Given it was a group email, it would have been a mistake. If she wanted to contact your husband, do you not think she would have been far more subtle?

Have you ever sent an email to the wrong person. I have (as have pretty much everyone I know!).

Your comments about her wanting attention because she was well groomed are hideously misogynistic.

If you tell him to block her, you will look unhinged.

I agree with the unhinged. You need help. Your thought process is not normal.

This is insane. If this is real, you have serious issues. Nobody should be this paranoid or controlling.

Exactly.

And why are you seeing his work emails? Seems a tad over involved if not controlling.

I met her several times when I went with DH to the office, and he always seemed smily and enthralled with her and what she was saying, which I did have words with him about, and he did later tone this down.

You are far too invested in this woman.

By the sound of it she doesn’t need to ‘accidentally’ send your husband a message if she wants to flirt with him anyway.

Your attitude to your husband seems very oppressive.

Only if you want to come across as a lunatic...

I can understand why you think I sound borderline paranoid, but I am just airing my thoughts on Mumsnet as it's a place where I can do so.

I wouldn't tell him in a demanding way; I'd put it more as an indirect suggestion, i.e. 'I think she might be looking for attention, do you think it might be worth blocking her?'

My DH used to give this girl a bit more attention than I felt was professional. Nothing untoward, but he did used to eye her up, grin like a Chesire cat, and act fascinated in anything inane she said. And I think she enjoyed the attention and continued chats with him rather than shutting them down. I was pleased when her internship left and my DH wouldn't have any reasons to chat to her anymore 😂

How did you happen to see his work emails?
You do come across as suffocating to be honest.

@Uptightmumma I can see why people would do this, but this woman doesn't have her own business; she's employed by someone else. The email in question was her giving advice on content written for a website. She must be in some sort of creative marketing role.

No, I don't think she was trying to start an affair....I just was thinking she might have been hoping to initiate a conversation for DH. Maybe she wanted someone to chat to, or his advice on something?

So she’s trying to drum up business. It’s a the worse strategy but the LinkedIn generation love it

@LiviaDrusillaAugusta I just saw the email on my DH's laptop screen when I walked past. He was at the dining table and I walked past, and noticed this girl's Google profile photo, and couldn't help but glance at the email...But I never said anything about it.

She doesn't have a business, she works for a company. I know because DH had to give her a reference.

Also.... DH would not be in her target audience at all.

Oh I think op is coming across as such quite strongly!! she seems like the kind of young woman who would like attention, always dressed immaculately and hair styled etc)
is that why you dress as you do op? Why you style your hair? For the male gaze…. and attention?