A genuine or accidentally-on-purpose email sent by mistake?

[roses19837]

Yesterday I saw that DH received a what appears to be obviously an accidental email from a former, younger female employee. The email was addressed to a group, staring 'hi all,' and from what I could see, was all about writing content for a website. Nothing to do with what DH does. DH just left the email, didn't reply, and went back to his inbox. He never mentioned it to me, but why would he? A silly accidental email is no piece of news really...

This employee left the company after an internship with my DH's business last summer.

As a bit of background, most of DH's work was from home, so he didn't see this woman in person all that often.

I used to suspect that DH was a bit too chatty and familiar with this young woman, although he never contacted her inappropriately outside of work. I met her several times when I went with DH to the office, and he always seemed smily and enthralled with her and what she was saying, which I did have words with him about, and he did later tone this down.

I wonder whether this girl 'accidentally on purpose' sent this email, in an attempt to strike up a conversation with DH? If so, would it be worth me telling DH to block her? I did used to wonder whether she liked the attention he gave her before I had words with him (she seems like the kind of young woman who would like attention, always dressed immaculately and hair styled etc). I could of course just be overthinking this

It does, but it's way off the mark in my case. I keep an eye on my DH's behaviour. Couldn't give a toss about the (former) young employee.

It’s a real shame that you have to keep an eye on your DH’s behaviour, especially after so many years of marriage. Must be very disconcerting, and explains your discomfort here.

I mean, I don't have to, but if I think he's overstepping a boundary/firting then sometimes I will.

He's never actually physically cheated, and I highly doubt, after 30 years together, he would want to; as I've said in a few posts, we both work from home, and socialise together in the evenings. Obviously sometimes he goes out with his friends, but it tends to be a pub at night/hike during the day.

DH is probably neurodivergent and undiagnosed; he wears his heart on his sleeve and sometimes doesn't conceal his thoughts or feelings where most people do. For example if he finds a woman attractive he'll just gawp, instead of a subtle glance and then glance away, like most sensible men would do in front of their wives (or on any occasion I'd hope!).

This did make me laugh 😅. This is NOT what Trust looks like!!!

well I’ve told you what people might start thinking, especially anyone even slightly queer.
you might want to start thinking about why you hate attractive women. If it’s not shame, and you trust your dh, then what is it? Why obsess over someone you’re not interested in? You sound like you think about her more than your dh!

This is all too weird now

It feels like you are starting to get a bit obsessed yourself....

The OP has an issue with the younger woman. It doesn't mean she's a lesbian. Stop reaching.

I’ve accepted that? And asked her what it is?
like seriously never once called her lesbian. Can you read? You seem a bit obsessed popping up to involve yourself in a threesome dynamic if we’re really going to go there

A threesome dynamic?
What are you even talking about 😂

Well I’m showing op a lot of attention and suddenly you’ve popped up to police my words and attract my attention instead. Did you parents argue a lot when you were younger? Do you often insert yourself into arguments for attention? What unmet childhood needs do you think are inciting you to involve yourself in dynamics like this?

That user, Portvfs, has gone off on a tangent and is, in my opinion, just trolling and derailing the thread.

I obviously do have an issue with this woman, but that's because of my DH's behaviour towards her, and I care very much about the latter.

Portvfs has been inventing some of his/her own details not included in my post. I've told them they are barking up the wrong tree, but they persist anyway. They're just trolling.

Maybe it’s because i, like many, have issues with how you’re talking about a woman 20+ years younger than you? And think you need to examine that rather than stalk your dh’s colleagues, but that’s just me.
i will let you go back to skirting the real issue though. Sorry I couldn’t help you