Lack of thought or am I being ungrateful?

[Wrongsideof50]

So DD age 13, asked what I would like for Mother’s Day, I suggested her (and her dad) making us an afternoon cream tea, fancy cakes, sandwiches sausage rolls strawberries type thing.. he took her to M&S and Sainsbury’s to buy stuff..I had already suggested, to both daughter and husband..them making nice sandwiches with bread or little fancy bread rolls with various fillings and cutting them small etc..just like you would get in a restaurant/cafe setting. Today whilst prepping lunch with DD she asked if had any cucumber, tomatoes to go with her lunch ..I said no we’ve run out but you’ve bought some for making Mother’s Day stuff so we can just use some from that …reply was oh no we didn’t get any cos we bought ready made sandwiches!!! Wtaf!! They bought a few sandwiches from M&S to cut up…I mean I get buying the sausage rolls and also cakes to cut up to save them baking but at least make the bloody sandwiches!!! .to say I’m disappointed is putting it mildly…zero effort, zero imagination, gutted 😞 is it too much to ask they put effort in and make it , it’s not like I’m asking for three course roast lunch it’s a few sandwiches! Am I being ungrateful and overreacting…not spoken to husband about it yet but have just been to shop and bought some rolls (and strawberries) so she can make some of it tomorrow! ☹️

Poor girl is just going to start dreading Mother’s Day. Her mum in an arse with her for not putting in sufficient effort

My suggestion to you is to wind your neck in and be grateful. Holy shit.

They got you exactly what you asked for

You had no problem with shop bought sausage rolls so I don’t see the problem with shop bought sandwiches.

It come across a bit ungrateful and controlling when you virtually write them a shopping list and instructions.

Some people would give anything to spend Mother’s Day eating a shop bought sandwich with their loved ones!

That wouldn’t bother me at all. I love a marks sarnie.

This. You are being ungrateful.

Pre-made sandwiches taste awful. I'm with you OP - it comes across as lazy and unbothered. How is your DP in general?

Absolutely. The irony of complaining about being criticised when the Op was clearly expecting everybody to criticise her 13 year old daughter.

Wow indeed. If they’re just sandwiches what is the problem? Your DD wanted to treat you so she’s gone out and got the stuff do that but because she’s not buttered the bread herself you’re disappointed! So ungrateful that I think this post can’t actually be real?

Learn some gratitude

But she literally just said that they cook from scratch all the time. If that's the way food is made, you would expect the same effort returned on a day where you are being looked after instead. And it's not just the daughter, is it? It's the dad too.

Honestly posters on here just love to be spiteful sometimes. It's hardly difficult to see why OP is upset.

She puts in a lot of effort. That same effort is not returned. And then she gets labelled ungrateful/spoilt/unreasonable etc etc.

If ‘they are just sandwiches’ it shouldn’t matter that they are pre-made surely?

It's interesting that's what you read into the posts because that isn't how I'd summarise them at all, both that pps were tearing into you or that the respondents thought it was a good idea to buy sandwiches as they were too tricky to recreate themselves.

I could not give a toss. You are overreacting imo.

Ye gods your poor daughter

why do I suspect that there will be lots of things she does that you don't consider up to scratch

The way they set the table will show how much they care……. Table cloth, the ‘nice(r’) china, napkins and - especially! - flowers…

You’re being ridiculous

Maybe if they always cook from scratch… the idea of M&S sandwiches would be a treat for DD and she’d regard it as such.

She is 13 FFS! Leave her alone. She got the tea and her mother is looking at her with a cats bum expression

Imagine starting a thread wanting posters to basically bitch about your young teen daughter

It doesn’t matter imo. YABVU - she’s 13!

zero effort, zero imagination, gutted 😞
they are just sandwiches lol!

So you're not gutted anymore? That seems best. M&S sandwiches are elite.

JFC these replies!

MN, the place where any woman expecting anyone to make an effort for them, even on the day which is literally about making an effort for them, is being ridiculous.🙄

The effort is literally the point. It’s what shows you care. If OP wanted a shit supermarket made sandwich I’m sure she has the cash to buy it herself.

You deserved better OP and I totally get it. You wanted them to put at least as much effort into what they gave you to eat, as you put into making their food all year.

It’s not like you asked for much. You asked them to compile a Sandwich, not to make a Michelin starred meal.

I love the 3 pack of mini ready made rolls from m&s, id be well happy with a wee platter of them 😋 xxx

She deserves better?

She’s on her moaning about her teenage daughter getting it wrong? Maybe that’s indicative of how she parents all the time?

Be grateful you have a child that asks what you’d like.

Anyway Mother’s Day is a made up Americanised day. I’m sad your your daughters behalf. Don’t complain next year when she doesn’t ask you.