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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

AIBU to feel insulted.

577 replies

Leftoutthewill · 21/02/2026 14:52

Mum died April 25, previous will stated that any estate was to be split between me and my sister. We should have been in line for a share of a 285,00.00 estate. My sister and her husband have taken responsibility for everything for my mum for the last 17 years, shopping, appointments caring for dad as he was dying, taking her on holiday, having her at Christmas, sitting with her at hospital for emergencies, helping her sort out bills, things going wrong with the house responding to her care alarm all thr while living 20 miles away. In the end she kept falling they took her to live with them and cared for her 24hours a day, eventually this became too much and she spent the last couple of months in a care home.
We just went every now and then and until recently we'd not seen her in four years.
My sister is executor of the will and chose to go through a solicitor. It turns out the six month probate finished on 12th February and I've recently had a letter to say that I'm due to receive some money but not detailing how much. I never received a copy of the will so have contacted the solicitor and have discovered that my sister has been left the majority of the estate and I'm left wih £10,000. She gets around £260,000
Apparently she changed her will about 12 months before she died, she has capacity according to a capacity assessment and its all legal and above board. Apparently there is very little I can do.
I feel like the solicitor should have written to me to explain about the 6 months probate but apparently the will was public information and was downloadable months ago. Apparently he onus is on me to find will and pay to download it then take action. I should surely receive more of a share?

OP posts:
Bronext · 21/02/2026 14:54

This reply has been deleted

This has been deleted by MNHQ for breaking our Talk Guidelines.

goz · 21/02/2026 14:54

Too bad for you then.

LivingDeadGirlUK · 21/02/2026 14:57

reads like a reverse...

7238SM · 21/02/2026 14:58

Its either a reverse or a joke!

ICouldHaveCheckedFirst · 21/02/2026 14:59

Being totally honest with yourself, OP, do you not think your sister deserves rather more than you, given how much time, effort and support she provided to your mother in the last few years of her life? It can't have been easy for her.
As long as your DM was of sound mind when she changed her will I think you'll have to just suck it up.

MrTwisterHasABlister · 21/02/2026 14:59

So you hadn’t seen your parents for 4 years and your sister had been sole carer (with her husband supporting), dealing with all practical and legal issues, dropping everything to help your mother, moving her in and then organising a care home and you think you're due an equal share of the estate?

If this isn’t a reverse, then you’re a CF of the highest order.

TidyDancer · 21/02/2026 14:59

You are the sister receiving the £260k, let’s dispense with the annoying reverse stuff. I’m sorry for your loss, is your sister kicking off about getting less despite not seeing your mum much? What are her grounds for objecting?

babasaclover · 21/02/2026 15:01

You didn’t care for her for 20 years and didn’t even see her for last 4 years of her life but now you want her money? YABVVU

allthegoodusernameshavegone · 21/02/2026 15:02

TidyDancer · 21/02/2026 14:59

You are the sister receiving the £260k, let’s dispense with the annoying reverse stuff. I’m sorry for your loss, is your sister kicking off about getting less despite not seeing your mum much? What are her grounds for objecting?

Yep agree, this is a reverse

WallaceinAnderland · 21/02/2026 15:02

The will was legally drafted and executed in accordance with the wishes of the testator. Perfectly normal. Nothing to see here.

FuckoffeeBeforeCoffee · 21/02/2026 15:03

Reverse

1980isitjustme · 21/02/2026 15:04

It would be a lot easier for people to offer advice on this if you actually write it from your own perspective. There’s no way the excluded party would write about how much the other party had done and that they hadn’t seen DM for 4 years, so you are going to get more comments on that than the real advice you are looking for as to whether the excluded party has a legal basis to challenge the will.

Username19893847477374 · 21/02/2026 15:04

The most obvious reverse, 2/10

BennyHenny · 21/02/2026 15:05

Is this nonsense inspired by the other thread about the solicitor complaint? Get a hobby OP!

tokennamechange · 21/02/2026 15:06

Ughhhh I was grateful that reverses seemed to have finally petered out on here 🙄

Why not just ask the actual question you want like a normal person?

Overthebow · 21/02/2026 15:06

Sounds fair to me, your sister did all the caring and you still get £10k.

TheAutumnCrow · 21/02/2026 15:07

LivingDeadGirlUK · 21/02/2026 14:57

reads like a reverse...

Got to be.

aCatCalledFawkes · 21/02/2026 15:07

I don't even know how you can complain about this. If you wanted 50/50 perhaps you could of done that in her life time instead of complaining about the lack of 50/50 in her death.

Presumably they had to fork out for the private care home for the last couple of months so makes sense they should be reimbursed.

LiveLaughLidl · 21/02/2026 15:07

What do you think is wrong / unreasonable of the above? If I've read right you didn't see your mum for 4 years and your sister did all her care? It seems completely fair to me.

QuirkyHorse · 21/02/2026 15:07

You got more than you deserved, you did nothing towards her care and haven't seen her for 4 years.
Realistically, what were you expecting?!

I'll give you the benefit of the doubt that this isn't a reverse 🙄

SconehengeRevenge · 21/02/2026 15:11

Not only a reverse, but a 2nd thread about it running as well

WhatTheHellsGoingOn · 21/02/2026 15:15

Of course this is a reverse

Bristolandlazy · 21/02/2026 15:16

I was reading that assuming you were getting half and that you were going to give her some of your half given how much she did for your mother and how little you did. Good for your sister being there for her mother and helping her every need.

TFImBackIn · 21/02/2026 15:16

It's definitely a reverse and your mum did the right thing.

Leftoutthewill · 21/02/2026 15:17

No not a reverse not saying is hould have 50 per cent but I don't think she should have virally of it.

OP posts:
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