Please help me urgently prep for judgy friend visit!!!!!!

[ByProudDreamer]

I have a friend who is super judgemental. I suppose no longer a friend, but my husband is very close friends with her husband, so I try to tolerate her. We meet up frequently, but I try to avoid it being at our house, however at short notice, they’re coming for lunch tomorrow.

I know I shouldn’t change to try to appease anyone else, but I’ll feel more relaxed if I have my house up to a decent standard.

Anyway, hosting is absolutely not my strong point, but I want to do a bit of a buffet for them coming. I have no idea what to buy or where to start, and I also have a fair amount of cleaning to do.

Can you wise mumsnetters please help me come up with an impressive buffet lunch, with minimal effort, to feed 8 (4 adults, 3 teens and 1 younger child). I’d be very grateful for help!

Madness. A judgey person will find something to comment on. Don’t waste your time and energy on trying to impress this person.

Exactly - I'd take myself out for a nice lunch instead, this sounds like shit weekend

Haha I wonder that all the time on MN! And I don't mean to disparage women with that comment.

just buy 4 or 5 varieties of pizza, some garlic bread and make a bowl of salad. Also buy some ready cut up fruit for afterwards.

Hire a private chef - just let your DH know to expect the invoice😁

Does your DB run around after your visiting friends?

Why do you care so much, she’ll still be judgy and you’ll have run yourself ragged for somebody you don’t like!

If your DH invited them let him crack on organising and cooking and tell him you’ll help if he tells you what to do.

Can just about work out what you’re saying. Bit of wine last night I was it? Same here 😂😂

Let the husband meet the other husband seperately from tour home.Why should you have your peace of mind strained in your own home.I would have behaved the same as you in the past though.
Your home should be your sanctuary nobody who criticises you.need step ove rthe threshold.

Loving the food suggestions. However, also get yourself a copy of the Let Them theory by Mel Robbins.

Honest, my husband had a friend like this with a wife who came and I used to work myself into a frenzy over it. Last time I just went out. I didnt tidy into oblivion or prepare food. I got over the fact she will be judging and just practiced out of sight out of mind.

Not food related but I confess to being a bit judgy…

Make sure guest toilet is clean, nice hand wash and a clean towel.

Guest toilet! Love this blind assumption! 🤣🤣

Do you also confess to being out of touch with reality?

I assume that poster just means ‘whichever loo guests will use’, though? Whether that’s a downstairs one or the family bathroom.

Buffet is too much of a faff?? And also a bit summery?

i would make any of these-
beef stew served with crusty bread and a lemon garlic zest topping (Jamie Oliver)
chicken basque (delia)
fennel and bean stew with crusty bread (bbc good food)

pudding would be berries, cream
and home made brownies or bought brownies.

basically a one pot wonder that you can cook. Today and will be super delicious tomorrow

FFS why?

Do you have any idea how many houses and flats in the UK have only one toilet?

Such a laughable assumption that there may be more than one.

In fact 'may' wouldn't have been so bad. It's the assumption there's another toilet or a 'guest toilet' that's silly.

its an intersting thread....there seem to be two schools of thought here....well three actually....school one is suggesting making a ridiculous amount of effort, school two is suggesting less effort but stiil indicating that the situation is reasonable....school three is saying some version of bugger off out and leave them to it. On the information....as though partner has presented it as fait accompli...I am deffo school three.

She does sound a pain in the arse, but, to be honest, I’m more pissed off with the OP’s husband.
How generous of him to ask people over, when he’s doing fuck all to help.
No cooking, no shopping and no cleaning.

I’d be telling him that there’s a change of plan. We’re going out for dinner.

What's your husband doing to prepare for thier visit?

🤷🏼‍♀️ surely the vast majority have made lasagne and chocolate brownies before?! That’s all there is to cook!

Could prep both in about 45 minutes!!

This 100
And I would like to know who did the inviting?
Op says she isn't a host
So why do it
No bloody way would I have that judgemental madam in my home
I'd be suggesting a pub lunch and I'd only be doing it to please DH... and boy would he know about it

nope. I don't like lasagne and make brownies out of a packet mix.

A can of spam
Cheap white loaf plonked on the table
And go out.

Yep. I so don't have time or would make time for someone like this, sorry. Way too many other things that are far more important than whether someone I don't even consider a friend is going to go all trip adviser over my toilet facilities or catering....

Okay I’ll bite at my laughable assumption.
I am prepared to be mocked but have just looked and the average 3 bed house in the UK has 2.5 toilets apparently.
I “assumed” hosting 4 adults, 3 teenagers and a younger child was not happening in a one/two bedroom flat.
Regardless- it doesn’t matter- which ever bathroom guests are using should be clean IMO