DH running with dd(8) at 5am

[foreveror]

Dh has always got up everyday at 5am to go for a run. No problem, it briefly wakes me up but he doesn’t turn the light on or make noise so I fall straight back to sleep.

Last couple of weeks he’s started taking 8 year old dd with him and it’s annoying me so much.

He tries to keep her quiet and get her down the stairs and out the door without waking anyone but it’s just so much louder having an 8 year old up and awake. Younger dc are sometimes waking up and coming into me.

I also feel I can’t fall back to sleep knowing she’s out there in the dark which I know is very silly, I don’t worry about her when she’s out with him in the day but it just feels different knowing she’s not in bed.

She’s very slim and does dance, gymnastics, football and skating every week so definitely doesn’t need the exercise. It’s just seems so unnecessary.

She tripped the other morning and came back in his arms in tears screaming she’d broke her ankle. She was fine, she’s just really dramatic but it made us all late for school. I know it wasn’t his fault but I couldn’t help feeling like it was as it wouldn’t have happened if he had just left her in bed.

I’m being completely unreasonable aren’t I? Would anyone else be annoyed by this?

It does seem too much for your daughter.... She must be exhausted!!! I'm up early but that's ridiculous

I was a far from fit child at that age but I loved going out for a run with my dad. It was something special between us for a bit.

Didn't last, but I remember it fondly.

Does she want to run with him?

She's 8 and old enough to know what be quiet and don't wake the others means.

Just keep reinforcing it every day and she should have it right soon enough.

See that would be my best argument but she doesn’t ever seem exhausted

Hang on: does she want to go, has she asked to go? Even if so, 5am is to early on school days unless you have shifted her bedtime.

Yes, it was her idea.

What time does she go to bed ? 5 am on a school day seems mad. Sleeps very important for so many reasons. Especially concentrating in school.

5am? What time is she in bed?
Personally I think 5am is an insane time to have a child so young out running. Why can't they go in the evening?

I think at 8 she is old enough to get out of the house quietly. I would encourage her to have everything ready to slip on so she doesn’t have to open drawers etc.
Once they are into a routine it will be fast and quiet.

If she wants to, then that’s end of it for me. Fab thing for her to do.

7.30-8

That’s fine then.

I suspect your DH would much rather run on his own tbh.

I also feel I can’t fall back to sleep knowing she’s out there in the dark which I know is very silly

She's with her parent! Maybe you don't need to look too far to understand why she's a bit on the dramatic side!

Have her put her kit, trainers, water bottle etc out the night before so she doesn't have to rummage about for things. If she can't get up quietly and not wake the whole house, she doesn't get to go. Simples.

If she wants to go and isn't falling asleep in school then I don't see a problem. She's out with her dad what in all honesty do you think is going to happen?
It would be annoying to wake everyone up but if you reinforce being quiet and maybe leave her running stuff downstairs she'll understand and even if the younger DCs come in can't they just lie in bed with you for a bit?
My DN is incredibly high energy and her parents have her out for a few hours every day but she just doesn't need much sleep (some kids don't).

Thing is kids can function on less sleep and be full of beans the next day, they don't seem to display the same tiredness cues as adults but it will be impacting her wellbeing. She's only 8, she needs her sleep. Tell her she can run after school if he has any midweek early finishes, or on weekends.

The running is perfectly reasonable.

it’s their inability to be quiet that’s the problem. That’s what’s need addressing.

Does he have to wake her to take her?

I would be focussing on her sleep - it cannot be understated how important good sleep is for children’s health and development. What time is she going to be bed if she’s getting up at 5???

How far are they running? Is it all running or walk/run.

Children under 9 should only be running about 1.5 miles and only around 3 times a week. Can't remember all the details but it's something to do with their skeletal maturation and that their growth plates are still soft and not yet fused.

Yeah I think this too. She is plenty old enough to understand she needs to be quiet for the sake of the rest of the house. If she can’t manage that she doesn’t get to go, simple.

They are ‘quiet’. DH shushes her if she tries to speak while upstairs, he makes sure all her running stuff is downstairs ready, makes her use the downstairs toilet, closes doors quietly.

There’s not really anything more they could do to be quieter, there always going to be some noise, It’s just knowing she’s up and awake that wakes me up.

She won’t be getting enough sleep. All because she wants to do it doesn’t mean you should let her

Really? that’s interesting thank you

They are doing around 5k more than 3 times a week, I don’t really know how much of it’s she’s running but I’d imagine she’s doing pretty well.

Ok in that case it’s something you need to find peace with because they aren’t doing anything wrong.