I don't want to do party bags

[GoingCrazy643]

I'm an immigrant to the UK. Been here 17 years (with a few stints abroad), DH is British. I now have a child of my own and he's getting to an age where birthday parties will be important. WTF is with people's obsession with party bags? What fresh hell is this where I have to spend more money (and much more importantly right now, time and mental energy) on gifts for my child's guests? Honestly the concept is insane. Where I grew up, host provides cakes/food/entertainment and guests brought gifts for the birthday girl/boy. End of story.

How big of a faux pas is it to not give party bags???

DH thinks they're very important.

Edit: For context, we are temporarily living abroad with DH's job but moving back to the UK next month and this is just a conversation that came up about the future. My OP seems a bit angrier than I actually feel 😅 I'm more confused than angry.

What age/no. of guests invited do party bags end? Is there a mathematical formula? If they are in year 6 and only inviting 3 friends to an activity - do you party bag?

I did the 10 for £10 books from the works and small party bags with fidget bracelets, mini jigsaw, stickers and chocolate buttons (amazon do bundles of things for cheap). I just couldn’t decide! The works do big bags of party bag tat with ten of each item if you want to keep it simple too! The books got the most excitement, and at least one person abandoned their party bag, so I think next year it will just be books and cake! I also got some mini cake boxes from the range, and gave people a choice whether to eat it or bring it home, and they all brought it home! One thing to say is sometimes you get a few siblings parents don’t tell you they are bringing, or people who haven’t rsvped and turn up anyway so have one or two spare party bags/books just in case (not the kids fault).

Party bags have been around as long as I remember. Anyone else remember the fortune telling fish made of red cellophane?

I digress. I think you should swerve the more worthy ideas like seeds and craft kits. Go for sweets and cheap little toys - they don’t have to be disposable plastic, there’s marbles, mini slime/playdoh, fun pencil or pen, stick on moustache, face glitter, little notebook etc.

And serving the cake at the party is now more usual than sending it off in a napkin IME. Probably because people have realised how blooming weird that was.

Just put a piece of cake and a balloon in a paper bag, no stress needed!

I don’t understand the big deal. If DH wants to do party bags then why stop him? What’s the harm?

cake:
You bring it out and sing happy birthday and blow out the candles.
I always then serve small pieces, but most people take it out to the kitchen, cut into slices and put it into party bags, wrapped in a paper napkin.

its essential

you hand them bags out and its a hint that party is over and to fuck off home

works every time!

I'm with you! I hate party bags, I don't do them and hate receiving them. They're full of tat which I don't want in the house and sweets I don't want my child eating (but then can't stop as they're a gift). I think if you've paid for a venue, food, drinks and cake for all the kids, no one should mind about not getting a party bag. The parties I've been to have also not done party bags and I'd hoped they had been phased out since I was young haha

Oodie, Uggs and an iPad????? Was it a sleepover or the Met Gala?

You keep the cake in the kitchen/other place if you’ve hired somewhere. Then when it’s time, you light the candles, bring the cake out and sing happy birthday.

the cake then gets taken away back to the kitchen where you cut it up, wrap the pieces of cake in a napkin and put one into each party bag

We try to keep it plastic free. I got paper sweetie bags and chunky outdoor chalks. About 4 chalks fit in a bag. Seal with a white label that the child can decorate in preparation for the party.

I never do party bags- a slice of cake and a book instead (you can get 10 picture books for £10 in The Works).

Party bags are just full of tat that ends up in the bin, hate it when my son receives one 😂

OMG. I just had an idea for a party that has probably never been done before. This is based on videos of a Secret Santa style office gift that seems to be popular in the Phillippines.

Instead of one big birthday present, everyone needs to buy an exact number of small presents as the number of kids attending. So each item can cost £1-4, depending on the gift budget is and how many guests. Each person takes turns pouring all the gifts on the table and kids will grab one each, almost Pinata style. Once every round is complete, every child has a goodie bag filled with better quality gifts than a standard one.

Bonus is that it saves the birthday child being deluged with tons of presents and not having the storage space for them. Every child also leaves with the same thng but knowing each item was thoughtfully purchased and it's a collection of things from all their friends.

Party bags are mandatory. Don’t stress too much though - piece of cake, a few sweets and some stickers will do.

I never did party bags.

I did a large, decorated, homemade cupcake with a few jelly sweets sprinkled around the edge for each person at the end. Kids loved it. After the first 2 parties (one for each of my children close in age) everyone started doing the same.

One mum did £1 advent calendars (her son’s birthday was November). Kids loved it.

I’ve done combos of:

Easter eggs
Books
Bath bombs
Pens
Stickers
Bubbles

And then of course the piece of cake. That fills half the bag!

And - yes I remember the red fish!

Yes still party bag!

Body sprays
bath bombs
lip balm
friendship bracelet etc

When my daughter was about 5 she used to try to leave parties early and I eventually realised it was because she couldn't wait for the party bag.

Kids live for this stuff. I also hate them.

If you want to minimise plastic crap there are loads of options. I really like potion kits and they are definitely the best party bags we have ever received (expensive tho). Also if you buy them on sale at Hobbycraft those paint your own moneyboxes / picture frames etc make for a really decent gift and are cheap.

I also collect all the abandoned party bag tat we receive and use it to stuff my kids party bags sometimes. I have 2 primary age kids who go to a lot of parties. At least there's some recycling this way. Kids have no idea.

Children now in their thirties. Never did party bags, but did play party games and made sure every child won something nice. Party bags going home had cake in them. So even in the 90's, some of us recognised acres of plastic tat were not great.

I really liked doing the party bags, I must be weird 🙈😂

It doesn’t need to cost loads.

Party bag should be piece of cake, a few sweets and something small even a balloon is enough
don’t overthink it

Ikr! Mad isn't it??

Just get husband to organise them.
From my experience all kids attending parties in UK will expect a party bag full of plastic tat and UPF sweeties. Facts.

Eek I love party bags! I'm from a country that don't do them but have lived in the uk most of my adult life. They were such a delightful little surprise at the end of a party. 😁 I loved finding out what DC got, and I loved filling them with cool stuff. The kids' faces when they opened them were always priceless. I didn't go all out with plastic stuff but I put fun things in there. The latest ones I did were little fleecy gaming blankets and the kids loved them. 🥹 Very little effort too haha.

Amazon sell kits with the bags and allmyhembits to put in them I think I got a pack of 12 sets for about £17/18 so less than £2 per child
I also always do happy birthday and feed kids the cake there and then as it saves buying puddings/ cakes/‘desert etc and nobody wants a cake with all the icing surgically attached to the napkin which colour has then run into and melted the icing!! I buy a tray of cupcakes -‘stick numbered candle in it, sing happy birthday then dish them out -
another easy hack no chopping up of cake or wrapping it up!