To be furious at my ‘supposedly’ best friend?

[missblueberrypie]

My ‘’best friend’’ is getting married in a few months. We’ve known each other since primary school and we always had an agreement that when we get married we would have each other as our maid of honours. I kept up my end of the bargain when I married my DWife three years ago. I fully expected that I would receive the same honour but apparently not. I found out that I will be a bridesmaid whilst her sister is the maid of honour. I might be overreacting but I am quite upset and frankly furious. I thought we knew each other better than this and I don’t know if the relationship will ever be the same tbh. I was even more heartbroken when she said that the reason behind this snub is the fact that I am pregnant and would not be able to put 100% effort into wedding planning. What should I do going forward?

Seriously? You’re not at primary school now.

Lol at 'might' be overreacting.

Sisters tend to get first dibs on MOH.

You're a bridesmaid, you should be pleased to be included.

You are behaving like a crazy person.

Please do not ruin a longterm friendship over a promise you made in primary school.

This is not worth losing a friendship over, especially a lifelong one.

Are you pissed off or are you hurt?

People to do tend to choose their sisters as MOH, imagine being her sister and not being MOH...

It isn't a snub to you.

I mean ..it's her sister fgs, I don't think she's being unreasonable. It would be more of a kick in the teeth if it was another friend over you but it's her actual flesh and blood. I think you might be a tiny bit over reacting.

But we had a deal and when she told me she was getting married I was so excited and I was already in my mind planning the hen do. I just feel like I’m not important anymore 😔

You know the world doesn’t revolve around you right?

You sound like you’re in an American high school movie. I get you might be disappointed but grow the fuck up

🙄🙄

I love Mumsnet. The pure madness of it. Chucking a shit fit because you're a bridesmaid and not the big boss bridesmaid?

I love Mumsnet. The pure madness of it. Chucking a shit fit because you're a bridesmaid and not the big boss bridesmaid?

You're getting a bit of a harsh response here but agree not a big deal at all OP. Enjoy not having to do heavy lifting and have fun on the day x

She has a sister. Of course she was going to ask her.

You can't hold people to agreements made when you were school age.

You'll destroy your friendship if you don't take a step back and realise you are being ridiculous.

Are you 10?

Seriously this comment comes across like you’re about 13

There’s so much to do at weddings, could you and the MOH plan the hen together?

Unless you are very young brides, I’d probably let the promise go.

This

Oh wow I’m getting really harsh responses. I just thought we were close but I guess not that close. She has 6 bridesmaid in total not including the maid of honour

You can still actively help plan the hens! But you might be very happy to not feel it’s all on you if you’re pregnant and presumably will have a little baby at the wedding- best of both worlds, your friend loves you and you can celebrate her wedding and enjoy your baby.

I think she made a good choice if your overreaction is anything to go by. Hen weekend drama guaranteed

We have always been there for each other and told each other everything. I’d say we are actually closer than her and her sister are, that’s what I don’t get

If she and her sister have a good close relationship then you’re right that you’re probably close to your friend but not as close as her sister. I get that it’s upsetting and a let down, but try not to let it get to you too much. You’re still part of her big day, and it is her day, so try to keep the focus on being happy for her.

How does her choosing her sister mean you're not close?! Do you expect to rank above sister? I assume you're joking!

Her sister is her sister. The closeness may be different, but there is a different kind of relationship there.

You are massively overthinking this.