To want to leave my partner over a chocolate cake

[AreliabfMite]

Been with my partner 3 years. The relationship has been fine and we have been genuinely in love. Lived together 2 years.

I’m unexpectedly pregnant, 7 weeks. Partner was terrified at first but has come round to it and says he is looking forward to parenthood but there have been repeated instances of unpleasant and lazy behaviour from him.

I work Monday to Friday 9-6. It’s been shit as I’m exhausted with this pregnancy but life doesn’t stop when you’re pregnant so I’m pushing through it even though it is shit. His work is having a quiet spell at the moment which means he’s only working around 20 hours a week but getting full pay (he’s on a 45 hour contract.) Cooking is all left to me as it “stresses him out” and occasions where I’ve begged him to cook as I’m exhausted and feel sick I have been met with weaponised incompetence, magically forgetting how to make meals he used to make all the time before I moved in. Even household stuff such as folding clothes after they’ve been washed, he will fold them in such a ridiculous manner that I genuinely wonder how the fuck he’s managed to fold it in that shape and then I have to do it all again myself.

I have snapped today. On Saturday I visited my parents who live in another city 2 train rides away. In the city where I changed trains I had an hour to kill. There is a viral slice of chocolate cake (I know…) on Instagram that has been my pregnancy craving, and they had a store in this particular city. They do online orders too but I can never get one as they sell out. I decided to go and treat myself to one. Keep in mind this is a HUGE slice of cake and is essentially a full-size cake just in the shape of a slice.

I had a tiny bit of it (literally one spoon worth) at my parents Saturday evening but it made me feel sick so I put it away. Partner picked me up in the evening and I went straight to bed as I was knackered, cake was left in the fridge.

I was in bed until 1pm today due the pregnancy fatigue, woke up craving the cake. I go down to find he’s eaten the entire thing.

I snapped a bit and stated he knew I’d been craving it. I explained I didn’t mind him having some as it’s huge but to eat all of it was horrible of him. He’s telling me I’m hormonal and need to get over myself but it feels malicious. His excuse was that he was hungry because I didn’t cook last night and didn’t make breakfast this morning. I’m so fucking annoyed at him

Leave.. it's not going to get better, you will just get more and more put upon,and more and more resentful. He sounds a spoilt,childish,selfish,smug gaslighting chauvinist .....the more pregnant,than had baby,your ill,life etc the more support,teamwork and understanding is needed in a relationship...he can't even say sorry,he puts it onto your totally reasonable and understandable reaction that's the problem...and if he apologises at a later date it doesn't count or matter,it's just to shut you up...your life will be a depressing up hill battle with him.And your son learns that's how you treat women,and your daughter learns that you accept being treated like that.Your supposedly closest person to you,who loves you so much . Neither gender child needs that as an example of love and partnership..

You’re not ending it because he ate your cake, you’d be ending it because he’s a twat.

Sounds like he kind of hates you a bit? I wouldn't put up with that.

Make him get the train to get you a new one. While he’s doing that kick him out.

You're only just pregnant, it's not going to get any better.

Why did you get pregnant by this man?. It will only get worse. Maybe you can try counselling.

When you moved in he Decided to do nothing round the house because he has a wife appliance now.

I can't believe people are still responding to this nonsense

I’d rather think it is that. I wish in that instance though that they’d come back and say “all sorted, no need to worry, thread closed”.

Instead of apologising profusely for his greed and trying to make it up to you, he is gaslighting you and being a shit.

Most other partners would be treating you like glass right now. I'm sorry but unless you are happy to be a single parent I would be reconsidering your future.

He on the other hand - "the break up came out of no-where over a slice of cake!"

You deserve better

Leave him unless you want to be tandem feeding your newborn and baby partner.

🤣 and this ‘Eve’ has just been announced as the new face of social media for GetBaked on Instagram. Someone trying to go viral I think!

It’s odd though

look how great we are sending cake to a pregnant woman whose abusive husband ate hers when she was craving it so much! Solving the worlds problems one at a time!

Everyone else was recommending LTB but Eve thought more cake would instantly solve him being a selfish arsehole and make everything OK.

It was a really ill judged move from @GetBakedEve

It's Get Baked's MO to post customer messages on their Instagram, with screen grabs of their reply offering free cake. Cynical? Yes. Would they go as far as to create a whole fake post for stealth marketing?I'm not sure, I'd hope no-one would stoop THAT low.

I haven’t been reading every post but did Get Baked post here offering a free cake ?

I checked out their website but would appreciate reviews from here before I buy for my husband’s birthday…. How big/what size/weight are they ?

TIA

To be honest I laughed all the way through this!
He clearly thought he was doing you a favour as the cake made you sick.
If you are having to take to your bed at 7 weeks, you have a wake up call to cope with at 7 months!

Why? I felt far worse at 7 weeks than at 7 months with all 3 of my pregnancies. At 7 weeks I was throwing my guts up for most of the day. At 7 months I felt absolutely fine.

Yes I only took the test because I was feeling so awful! Then 3-7 months was fine and then the last couple of months weren’t much fun

anyway I wouldn’t worry about OP as I suspect she is a marketing ploy!!!

I think this is a preview of your life with him. Go to couples counseling.

Sadly, I have one like this, except I'm disabled, and the less that I can do, due usually to the amount of pain I'm in, the less he seems 'able' to do. He'll never cook, and does the bare minimum for me, that I'm really unable to do. Trouble is, at 66, who else would want me 🤷🏻‍♀️ blasted men, eh?

@Itsjustmethatsall Better to be on your own than with someone like this, who cares if nobody else wants you? At least you wouldn't have this rubbish to put up with.

LTB - Before you end up with two babies to look after

Sounds like a selfish little manchild, no wonder he shat his pants when he found out you were pregnant.