Birthday/Christmas cards on display at home - are they free for anyone to read?

[Mamma1828]

Prompted by a relative who recently visited, picked up a birthday card I had propped up on the window sill and read the message inside. It was tucked away mostly out of sight in a low corner and I’d kept it out because it is a very beautiful one.

For context this relative hadn’t sent me a birthday card that year (I have stopped sending cards and I send good wishes by WhatsApp) and this was the first year they hadn’t sent a card to me, so I was wondering if this had provoked some annoyance in them.

I don’t have visitors too often but the ones I’ve had have happily picked up cards and read the messages, the way you might pick up a magazine to flip through at someone else’s house. I don’t know why they feel it is ok to read them because the messages are either lovely but not interesting, or if there was something more personal to read then other people really shouldn’t be reading them! If I have any on display it’s because I want to enjoy the lovely pictures, not for people to have a nose at.

I’m very tempted to write one up with a racy message inside for future visitors. 😂

Anyway curious what others think - are cards a free for all for anyone to read?

If they were on display in the main living room I would think it was ok to look at them. If any were particularly personal I would assume they would be displayed somewhere more private such as the bedroom.

I'd find it a bit of an odd thing to do but it wouldn't bother me. I'm assuming it was in a room like your lounge where everyone goes. If it was very personal I'd put it somewhere more private like the bedroom. If they went into your bedroom and read it then that's very different.

Yes I would think it was ok to look at them.

I like to look at cards so I might go over and admire the outsides on the mantelpiece , but I wouldn’t pick up and read someone else’s cards. It does seem rude.

I don’t think I’ve ever had a guest do that (though I did have to start hiding the mail as a relative would read that.)

They’re on display. The word display suggests they are deliberately arranged for viewing - insides too. Why do people not know what the word display means these days? If you don’t want people to read the inside then don’t keep it on display… I despair I honestly do.

They are out in public, so yes, of course its ok to look at them.

If they are on display in the living room, yes, I think it would be ok. It's not something that would bother me. I wouldn't put out anything that I felt was private.

I have definitely picked up a particularly nice card at my parents to see who sent such a beautiful one.

The outsides sure, I would never pick up and read them, that's like reading someones letters because they left the post on the coffee table.
Outrageous behaviour

I used to pick up and read cards in my parent's house, and come to think of it I have done in other people's homes (people I'm close to), and it wouldn't bother me if anyone looked inside any cards I had on the mantelpiece. It's not something I've ever thought about before ....

Yes and No. We freely read each others in our family, but I wouldn’t think to do it on a playdate with a parent I barely know.

@Arlanymor I disagree. The outside is on display , how can that word be used to describe the inside. Which is not visible and is not being displayed.

Last time I looked we lived in a 3D world not a 2D one. If you don’t want the inside of your cards looked at then don’t put them on display. It’s not hard.

I’ve never had anyone read birthday cards out on display.

Until FIL picked up one of my birthday cards with a rather lewd message in from DH 🤣 I feel sick thinking about it.

Echoing pp, if cards are on display in a living room I take this to mean both the inside and the outside (and bear this in mind when I am writing cards to DH!)

ETA xposted with @Overstimulated 😅

I would find it a bit odd if people did this. Admire the picture on the card sure, but why are you reading the message inside? No reason other than pure nosiness. I would consider the picture as being on display rather than the message (as you would either have to pick up the card to read it, or contort yourself sideways).
I would consider it askin to there being a pile of letters under the coffee table.
Or even just ornaments on display. You wouldn't pick them up and scrutinise them without asking first.

My mum always reads my cards and I don’t care but I also think “why are you interested?” I would never read someone else’s because…why would I be bothered what’s inside them?

I think there is a split on this - it used to drive my Mum mad that her MIL would open and read all our cards (even taking them out of cardboard holders at Christmas) as she felt it was akin to reading someone else's post or nosing in their bedroom, but the MIL evidently didn't feel the same as she wasn't discreet!

Lesson well learnt, birthday cards are no longer displayed 🤣 I did consider burning them to hide all evidence once.

Some people on this thread are seriously weird. ”Oh look at how much I am loved and admired by looking ONLY at the outsides of my cards!”

If you don’t want people to read the inside of cards then keep them in your bottom drawer. My goodness. It’s not like they are opening an envelope. They are not going through your mail. Why are people so stupidly precious? What on earth is in the cards that you don’t want people to read?

NO! No one can read the inside of my cards - despite the fact that they only stand up by being open and displaying half of the inside text - just admire the naff glitter penguin. They’re hardly works of art!

I read the cards at my parents or my siblings' houses, and they would do it at mine! I just hide any I don't want them to see.
I wouldn't do it at anyone else's house though, unless I could have a sneaky peek while they were out of the room!

Because you both know the sender and it’s nice to read their sentiments to your mutual loved one?

Cards displayed in the living room ok for people invited I to your home to look at. Keep any private ones in bedroom.

Yes of course they are

You had them on display meaning they are available for people to look at, no idea why you are confused.

I just can't imagine a world where I would care about this! It's so so trivial! Who cares? If it's that private, don't have it out. Surely anyone who comes to your house is a reasonably close friend or relative?