16yr old moving out - what do I need to do?

[Allaboutthechild]

Not sure where to put this.

I wrote a long post but basically my 15yr old daughter regularly tells us she doesnt like us, isnt happy and plans to move out as soon as she's 16. At one point she was marking the days off her calendar.

She's not put any thought into it eg how rent will work so I dont think it will happen but if when she's 16 she does decide she wants to move out, what will actually happen?

Obviously we dont want her to and have made that clear. Equally we're not going to let her make herself homeless or end up somewhere dodgy so if we need to pay rent then we will (we haven't told her that).

But what is the process? Just trying to prepare ourselves if she does walk out on her 16th birthday as she said this evening (during a tantrum over washing a plate). If it matters, she has a safe, solid and I would have said generally happy home (although she disagrees clearly).

I'm not after commemts about why she is saying this, just the practicalities please.

Why on earth would you pay rent. She doesn’t sound in the slightest bit mature enough to live on her own. Don’t entertain this at all. She can present herself as homeless at the council if she really wants to.

Tell her to put herself on the council list for a flat, until then she can stay in a hostel. Of course she can carry on living with you if that doesn't sound appealing.

If she's that determined then let her work it out for herself.

Well she won't be able to will she? Its not as simple as deciding to 'go rent somewhere'. Who in their right mind would rent to a 16 year old? She could go down the council route but she's be seen as making herself homeless and probably end up in temporary accommodation. Probably a hostel. Not really the dream is it? I assume you have told her all of this...

Sorry I have no experience and this is a crappy answer from the internet but I got this answer when I typed it in:
Yes, in the UK, a 16-year-old generally has the legal right to leave home without parental permission, as parents can't force them to stay
; however, parents remain responsible for their welfare, and a 16/17-year-old leaving without a solid plan or support risks homelessness, requiring local council housing help, but facing difficulties renting due to contract limitations, so seeking support from services like Childline or Shelter is crucial for planning.
Your Rights at 16+ (UK Context)

• Right to Leave: You can legally move out at 16 without your parents stopping you, and courts won't force you back if you're safe.
• Parental Responsibility: Parents must still ensure your safety and housing until you're 18, even if you leave.
• Housing Duty: If you're homeless at 16 or 17, your local council's housing/social services must help find accommodation as you're considered a "priority need".

Challenges & Practicalities

• Contracts: You can't legally sign binding contracts (like rental agreements) until you're 18, making it hard to rent independently.
• Financials: You'll need a job and stable income to cover living expenses, which is challenging without references or rental history.
• Support Networks: Staying with friends (even temporarily) counts as being homeless if you lack a stable home, triggering council support.

Where to Get Help

• Childline: For advice and support (tel:0800 1111 0800 1111).
• Shelter: For housing advice (shelter.org.uk).
• Centrepoint: For homeless young people (tel:0808 800 0661 0808 800 0661).
• Local Council: Your housing or social services department.

looking at this I would contact your local council housing and social service. I would also contact the school by email so you have a log of it and paper trail and say the same as your post and ask for advice

good luck

And it’s not just rent is it, council tax, bills, food. You’d be looking at well over 1k a month. Hell would freeze over before I paid that for a stroppy 16yo who doesn’t want to do the washing up.

Obviously.

But shes also very stubborn and if this is something she decides to do then we want to make it safe for her.

We havent told her we would pay her rent.

NSPCC

DO NOT indulge this by paying rent.
Is she allowed to leave school before 18?

What do you think is causing these feelings? Is she being bullied at school? MH problems?

Unless sh has a job how will she pay rent? The council will say she has intentionally mad herself homeless so do not have a duty to house her. She sounds immature and entitled. Let her find out life doesn't owe her a free ride.

It's quite funny, when you think about it. Take her seriously and ask her how much she thinks rent is, then ask about council tax and other bills. Ask her what kind of people she thinks live in really bad accommodation.

What does she think is wrong with her home? Is it that you disagree with her about things? Does she think that won't happen if she was living elsewhere? In exchange for her rent would she expect other tenants to agree with everything she says?

She will grow up, OP. It's a horrible age for so many parents and teenagers.

Thank you. That's all I could find and our local council website was even less helpful.

Childline

She would likely get put into a hostel if she declared herself homeless. She may even end up in the care system. Someone more knowledgeable may come along but I should think you would have to confirm that she is homeless which of course you wouldn’t? I think at 16 you would possibly be liable for social services involvement should you say she isn’t allowed to live with you anymore. You’re not considered an adult until 18! Likewise with rent, you would have to sign to be a guarantor but if you were prepared to do this (and could find a landlord willing) then I’m not sure it is believable that you don’t want her to leave.

But would you actually pay her rent and related expenses? And if so, why would you do that? She needs to be able to live independently (she can't, how could she) or find a way to live at home or with another adult.

At 16 she will likely be put into foster care won't she... some sort of supported accommodation.

There is a centre where I live for teenagers who cannot live at home. I think that would be her best option. I don't know how people get a place there though

Has she got an older boyfriend or older friends? She could live with them - maybe what she’s thinking?

I'd sit down with her, show her what a room share would be, all the costings etc and let her have a real look at how much independence costs.

You make it safe for her by not doing it. If you enable it (though nobody will rent to a 16yo so doubt it will happen) of course she’d skip off. Living on your own at 16 is the dream. But it’s hardly safeguarding her is it? You wouldn’t have a clue what she was up to or who with. It would be totally neglectful.

if it’s a choice between staying at home or going in a hostel which do you think she will do?

Thank you. I dont know that she would qualify for that though. I guess it depends on why she says she cant come home.

No landlord would rent to her, and she wouldn’t be priority for council accommodation.

Reality will hit her soon enough I expect.

You nod along and let her delude herself that moving out will be a dream and she'll be able to pay the rent and all the bills and keep up with all the housework on her own.
I'd not even bother responding to it when she brings it up to be honest. I assume it's part of a regular strop when asked to do something she doesn't want to do? I'd say it's unlikely it actually happens, but if it does a very helpful MN has already posted the useful links above.
I'm sorry OP, it must be upsetting to hear.

She won’t be able to get a tenancy and social services don’t have resources coming out of their ears to rehouse teens with perfectly safe homes who just fancy moving out. She is young and clueless about the world. If she is absolutely determined to move out then let her shout her mouth off and expect her home with her tail between her legs as soon as the reality of her situation and the alternative options available to her become clear.

I’m not sure that there would be many private landlords who would take in a 16 year old without a guarantor who would be liable for unpaid rent and any damages incurred.

This. Why on earth would you!?