To be upset that no one got me a present this year

[middleeastmum86]

Put on a big family christmas for 8 people. Spent a fortune on food, presents for the kids, alcohol, buying presents for everyone. Spent all day cooking frankly a Michelin star level meal. Did not get any presents off anyone. Literally nothing. I spent over £1500 on putting that day on.

I’m not even that upset I’m just resigned to it and more upset that I’m not more upset if you know what I mean!

That is rotten and YANBU.

Are you just keeping your head down and letting them all assume you don't mind, don't need anything etc? I really wouldn't, I'd let them know you're disappointed no one could be bothered to think of you!!

Just posted on a thread before I saw this one. Snap. No gifts for me either. I’m single / no kids but did Christmas for my dad. Presents, food, tree etc etc. He forgot to get me anything. He is elderly and we recently lost mum but it still pinched a little.

Wow! Who were these ungrateful people? I'd be dropping them from my life of they did this to me!

Is there a historic understanding or agreement that presents are for kids only? That might explain why but as the hostess they should most definitely have brought you gifts to thank you for your efforts.

youve given the impression you love cooking/putting on a fancy spread/ ? Are wealthier than them and like to spread your largesse/ love to make others happy which is your reward - ——don’t mention the money or you look scroogelike but I’d def message that you were disappointed no one bothered to buy you a present

I don't understand why getting a present is important?

I bought myself two presents and wrapped them just in case. If my partner wouldn't have gotten me anything I'd be pissed off too. The least someone can bring to a meal they are invited to is flowers and chocolates or a gift card. So yeah shitty guests you had there

Dreadful. Absolutely dreadful. Don’t host or cook next year.

Seriously?

Thats awful. Why not OP?

Buy yourself something. I know it's not the same when it's your own money but get yourself something you'd like...a spa voucher, a new coat etc But yes it's really upsetting that no-one thought to get you anything.

Google 'SNL Christmas robe'. It will make you laugh at least. I think a lot of mothers can relate to it.

That is appalling! Did they really all turn up empty handed???

I would be asking them directly why they didn't gift you anything?
It would be interesting to read their answers.

I didn’t get anything. Also celebrated with eight family members on Christmas Day. I’ve bought myself some lovely stuff though to compensate 😅

Am sorry OP, that's so rude of them. Standard practice to bring a little gift for the host, esp when such a grand affair, let alone it being Christmas and family. Disappointing to say the least.

All I can say is don't do it next year. £1,500 is one hell of a saving and a treat to yourself!

Yanbu. How many are young children? Who are the others and did they buy gifts for each other?
Did you buy gifts for them?
Please treat yourself to something

Rosealea, Rosealea, Rosealea. You're supposed to name change when going from thread to thread trolling people, you silly sausage!

Who were the 8 people? I would have a taken a Christmas present for my host plus a bottle of wine and a box of chocolates for the table. Are the DC old enough to get you a gift/do they not have someone to help them with this?

I presume nobody buys anything for you?

Cannot understand how anyone thinks it’s ok to turn up empty handed. Especially at Christmas and a huge effort has been made.

Depends who the family are. Wouldn't expect anything from distant relatives even if I'd volunteered to host

I don't think it's ok, I am so baffled I am trying to think if there is an explanation we are missing. Like they are all under 5 or over 100

Take some comfort in you'll never have to do it again. I certainly wouldn't be repeating my efforts next year & hoping for a different outcome. One strike.....

Really? You don’t think that it’s polite to show your appreciation of the time, money and effort the host has put in to providing food and drink and possibly entertainment for you and others? I suspect if /when you have children you will be back here complaining about how self-entitled, spoilt and selfish they are and you’ll wonder why!!!

At Christmas we can show our love and appreciation for others through a thoughtfully chosen gift, it doesn’t need to be expensive, just well thought out for the person it is intended for.

Wine, chocolates, flowers for the host are at least a small acknowledgment of their generosity in hosting.

That's so depressingly thoughtless of them. I'd be so upset. And I'd never put myself out for any of them ever again.