To be upset that no one got me a present this year

[middleeastmum86]

Put on a big family christmas for 8 people. Spent a fortune on food, presents for the kids, alcohol, buying presents for everyone. Spent all day cooking frankly a Michelin star level meal. Did not get any presents off anyone. Literally nothing. I spent over £1500 on putting that day on.

I’m not even that upset I’m just resigned to it and more upset that I’m not more upset if you know what I mean!

Really?
I don’t believe this. It’s nonsense.

if it makes you feel any better, my Father turned up with Holly he had picked in the garden, wrapped in the wrapper from a packet of digestives…..

I agree and wondered how rude are OP’s guests.
Are they your own family ?
Your children ? If so, you reared them. Didn’t you teach them good manners ?

I wouldn’t do it again. Some flowers at least would have been nice.

Unfortunately people who don’t complain or proclaim loudly what an amazing effort and how much work they’ve put into something seem to be consistently overlooked.

Incredibly rude of your guests. Do not invite back.

I’m struggling with this one to be honest. Do your relatives usually exchange gifts? Did they buy gifts for each other? If you’re the only adult left out then I’d be wondering why but if they only bought for the children then it’s not just you that’s been left out.

Our family never bring anything to anyone else’s house be it Christmas or a normal meal. Whoever is hosting hosts. If they don’t want the cost or the effort they don’t invite anyone over.

YANBU to be upset by that. Why didn't anyone get you a present? Did any of the other adults get presents?

No presents? Horrible. Even if no presents previously agreed, they could have bought some flowers and wine. 🤷‍♀️

I can’t really explain it they just didn’t think to. Next year I’m going to the Maldives with the kids

Good. Don’t do all this ever again.

You must tell your guests though - incredibly thoughtless behaviour and they need to be told and it made clear that they aren’t invited back.

Oh give over . It’s a sign of love and appreciation at a key time of year and most normal people understand that.

Who were your guests @middleeastmum86?
Your immediate family?
Wider family members ?
“Friends” ?

Do the 8 people include your DP/DH? If so, surely the 2 of you would have discussed what you want for Xmas and bought each other gifts?

Did they bring food and wine at least? Surreal level of entitlement

My kids are 5&7!

Next year spend £1500 travelling instead!

Really rude, bad manners and incredibly unlucky for those people who would go into someone else’s home to eat food and be jolly and not present a gift. Whether a bottle of wine, homemade chutney etc… you have to get something. It’s just bad luck.

Yes that’s horrible… nothing from a partner, parent or child of an age they’re able to buy things.

I would be very sad.

Ok - your kids have a partial excuse (I plan to get my kids used to producing something g handmade for Xmas). However, who were the other 5 people?

Wow, I’m much less polite than you OP - I’d be kicking off.

What’s the excuse for that??

🙄

Who were the 8 people?

Where the adult guests family? Enjoy the Maldives next year. If asked why or complained at because your not hosting then reply with "seen as not one person bought me a gift or even flowers to show appreciation of the time, money and effort i went to i felt the £1500 it cost me would be bettee spent on a holiday to the Maldives.

So who are these 8 people? Your kids are little so discount them. So the other five?
And did you say anything? When they opened presents from you did you say ‘oh where’s mine?’ Looking at each person expectantly - and if met with blank looks ask ‘so I’m to buy all this food and cook for you and give you nice gifts and you…?’
I’d shake my head and leave the room at that point to let them stew a bit.
No hosting and no presents next year.