To be upset that no one got me a present this year

[middleeastmum86]

Put on a big family christmas for 8 people. Spent a fortune on food, presents for the kids, alcohol, buying presents for everyone. Spent all day cooking frankly a Michelin star level meal. Did not get any presents off anyone. Literally nothing. I spent over £1500 on putting that day on.

I’m not even that upset I’m just resigned to it and more upset that I’m not more upset if you know what I mean!

It’s the normal thing on Christmas! In fact the normal thing to bring something for a host (even a bottle of wine). It’s rude to the point of nasty not to bring anything at all.

gifted my kids friend and his father a vr headset and some games..not one iota of thanks...some people are just ungrateful c*nts

@Rosealea

Youre so right! they’re not important for adults. OP needs to stop whinging, and just be grateful. Everyone else had a nice Christmas with presents and enjoyed the meal she cooked - that’s what counts and she should be happy with that

You are a mug spending £1.5k on Christmas Day, chalk it up to experience and treat yourself next year.

Never get them another present again. Next year if they ask are you hosting just say you must be joking. If they ask more tell them exactly why. And yes, go to the Maldives.

Put on a big family Christmas for 8 people. rude ungrateful arseholes.

Sorted it for you. Next Christmas just don't bother.

If you chose to do this what is the problem? If it didn't make you happy don't do it again.
I did 6 on Christmas day and 9 on Boxing day, each year. BUT.... it makes me happy.

It's basic social etiquette 101 that you take "something" when you go to someone else's home for a meal, Xmas or otherwise. The very least everyone should have brought should have been a bottle of wine, box of chocs or some flowers, whether Xmas or at any other time. Turning up with nothing at all is absolutely awful, even worse for a big Xmas meal.

It's just basic respect.

OP isn't a family slave.

Her entire family turning up and being fed, with no care or consideration of her effort or feelings is really shitty.

I'd have handed them a bill for the dinner.

DH didn't get me anything and I had a number of presents for him. Difference though is that he did all the cooking on Christmas day and a lot of the washing up too. He'll still be getting a bill from me at some point though - as in a shopping list of things to buy me in the Christmas sales. Top of the list is a new TV as our current one stopped working properly 6 months back - he's already been told this but hasn't actually sorted it yet.

It was me, my two kids, my husband, sister, brother in law and Dad and husband’s friend.

Since then my Dad winged me some cash to contribute.

P**d off that my sister gave nothing I’ve bought her a snowboard in the past and paid for flights to NZ for her when she said she had no money (turns out she does - lots - she just likes others to pick up the bill).

My husband….. sigh.

My daughter pointed out to everyone that I hadn’t received anything so the point was made!

Yes I am a mug.

i didn't get any gifts this year or last
probably won't get any next either, despite several well paid adults at the table

They are all rude pricks. You never go to someone's house for a meal and turn up empty handed, Christmas even more so.

I went to a friend's for dinner in mid December and took a bottle of wine, a pack of fancy Xmas biscuits from a local bakery and a card, and that was a casual pre Christmas get together.

Why are you sighing about your husband not buying a present? Make a big deal about it. Let him know. Don’t accept crap behaviour.

Tell them or stop hosting. This is daft.

Your husband didn’t even get you anything? Embarrassing. What was his excuse?

Speak to your husband at the very least!

We've made it a tradition since our girls were toddlers that they choose a gift for each other and for mum and dad, whatever B&M had for years. We'd go all together then take a child each, then buy for the other parent and child. Now the girls are older they sometimes have an idea themselves and we order online.

Next year don’t bother, let someone else do it.

So, ignoring the fact it’s Christmas, if you go to someone’s house got dinner do you usually show up empty handed? I’d find that outrageously rude.

Being Christmas I took Christmas gifts for my parents plus an orchid in a special glass vase instead of a bunch of flowers (so she didn’t have to deal with arranging flowers in a vase on top of everything else). Op I’m sorry you’re surrounded by such selfish people.

What has your husband said?

As others have asked, what’s your husband’s explanation?

They're was a thread very recently where the OP's high earning son in his mid twenties, living with his parents and not paying a penny towards his keep, didn't get her a Christmas present.
Loads of mothers posting on that thread claimed that they didn't expect or want presents from their adult children, and the OP was being unreasonable in feeling hurt.

It seems that a generation of young adults has been shown that parents got those who love you most, just aren't necessary. And this is what happens.

@middleeastmum86 honestly, I'm usually a bit of a wuss about awkward situations, but if that happened to me I'd make it clear that I'm upset not to have been considered when I'd bought thoughtful gifts for them all.

@middleeastmum86 you're not a mug, they are mean spirited. This is on them, not you. You've been lovely , thoughtful and generous.

You deserve much better than this sorry lot, especially your husband. What an atse he is. I'd be having words to explain how disappointed and sad you are that he didn't think about you.

Happy new year to you. X

Yes, she is….