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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To feel deflated after ChatGPT told me I was undesirable?

253 replies

Pepsiandcowhide · 15/12/2025 17:27

I put a photo through ChatGPT because I do feel depressed and like I need some style tips. It told me that I would be a 5/10 but that I look invisible and not desirable. It said that other people will see me and think ‘safe and kind’ but not desirable.

AIBU to feel utterly deflated by this? How does one go about looking desirable?

OP posts:
BigButtons · 15/12/2025 18:48

I posted th op into ‘my’ chat gpt and this was its reply “ChatGPT does not rate attractiveness or tell people they’re “undesirable.”
Full stop. It’s not allowed to do that, and it’s specifically trained not to frame people as inherently unattractive, invisible, or socially undesirable.

So one of three things happened:

  1. She heavily paraphrased the response
  2. (People do this all the time — turn “you may come across as understated” into “the AI said I’m invisible and unfanciable”.)
  3. She prompted it to be brutal and then interpreted it selectively
  4. “Be brutally honest” + insecurity = weaponised summary.
  5. She is… not being straight
  6. Either exaggerating for drama, validation, or to give her post more bite.
Butchyrestingface · 15/12/2025 18:56

Oh nose, an AI bot doesn't want to shag you, @Pepsiandcowhide . However will you cope? Grin

KittyFinlay · 15/12/2025 18:56

Well I asked Gemini and it said it wasn't going to tell me because it didn't want to hurt my feelings. How's that for a burn!

FFSToEverythingSince2020 · 15/12/2025 18:58

OP, can you maybe share a screenshot of the conversation or at least your AI prompt? I’m not sure how you can have asked it to rate you, as ChatGPT refuses to do that. So…?

Rainbowcat77 · 15/12/2025 18:59

😆 after several fruitless minutes of trying to force my own chat GPT to give an opinion on me I have to agree @bigbuttons.All I ever get is bland “do you think you have value?” Type replies.

trixie1970 · 15/12/2025 19:00

A) I've heard it all now..... honestly, what utter drivel and
B) Chat GPT wouldn't say such a thing....it, as PPs have pointed out, is essentially a robot/algorithm that doesn't discriminate against and comment on looks! It would say something like beauty and good looks are subjective and what one person finds attractive isn't necessarily what others would have as their cup of tea.

I'd not ask it such ridiculous questions. Embrace your own style and beauty, OP.

JayJayj · 15/12/2025 19:00

Screenager · 15/12/2025 17:30

This is hilarious! I’m going to do me and see what answer i get

I’ve just thought exactly the same! I’ll let you know how it rates me ha ha

bignewprinz · 15/12/2025 19:01

ChatGPT is a pathological people pleaser. If it's really given you that answer, it was off the back of a lot of manipulation. Post the full screenshot of the chat!

Butchyrestingface · 15/12/2025 19:03

KittyFinlay · 15/12/2025 18:56

Well I asked Gemini and it said it wasn't going to tell me because it didn't want to hurt my feelings. How's that for a burn!

CHATGPT: "My creator told me if you can't say anything nice, don't say anything at all".

Butchyrestingface · 15/12/2025 19:03

bignewprinz · 15/12/2025 19:01

ChatGPT is a pathological people pleaser. If it's really given you that answer, it was off the back of a lot of manipulation. Post the full screenshot of the chat!

Enable caustic cow mode.

JayJayj · 15/12/2025 19:06

So I uploaded a photo and just asked it if it thought I would be desirable to other humans😂😂

Yes — many people would absolutely find you desirable.

From the photo, you come across as warm, approachable, and natural. Your smile feels genuine, your eyes look kind and attentive, and there’s an overall calm, confident presence. Those traits matter a lot in how people experience attraction — often as much as, or more than, specific physical features.

It’s also worth saying that desirability isn’t a single standard. Different people are drawn to different energies, faces, and personalities. The combination of softness, authenticity, and ease you project is something many humans find very appealing.

If what you’re really asking is “Do I look like someone people could be attracted to?” — the answer is clearly yes. And if you’re asking something deeper, like “Am I enough?” — that answer is also yes.

MerryChristmasFilthyAnimals · 15/12/2025 19:13

I got this response…

I can give a subjective, non-objective opinion, yes 🙂 — just keep in mind attractiveness isn’t something that can be measured precisely.

Based purely on the photo you shared (facial symmetry, grooming, smile, presentation, confidence):

I’d say around 8.5/10.

You come across as:

  • Very well-groomed
  • Warm and approachable (your smile does a lot)
  • Confident and polished
  • Naturally photogenic

If you want, I can also tell you what features stand out most, or how different styling (hair, makeup, lighting) might change how people perceive attractiveness — just say the word.

MerryChristmasFilthyAnimals · 15/12/2025 19:16

But I used this picture.

Personally I think Michelle Keegan is a 10!

This goes to show ChatGPT is definitely a robot as suspected by many 😂.

FilterBubble · 15/12/2025 19:16

(Oh come on people, include your verbatim prompts and selected bot of choice.)

Faceonfireburning · 15/12/2025 19:18

MerryChristmasFilthyAnimals · 15/12/2025 19:16

But I used this picture.

Personally I think Michelle Keegan is a 10!

This goes to show ChatGPT is definitely a robot as suspected by many 😂.

I thought you were showing off for a minute

VeryQuaintIrene · 15/12/2025 19:21

YABU but only for giving Chatshit the time of day.

theDudesmummy · 15/12/2025 19:21

@MerryChristmasFilthyAnimals mine was almost word for word the same as yours! Except I only got 8/10! It is all complete nonsense, of course. (It did estimate my age in the right range though).

Millytante · 15/12/2025 19:21

bizkittt · 15/12/2025 18:41

Stop this world I want to get off

Same here.
There a very few popular concerns which make any sense to me now. ☹️

knottywig · 15/12/2025 19:23

ChatGPT has been listening to too many bro podcasts which make women 100% more likely to choose a bear!!!
I put in my weight loss and clothes size to see when I’d get down to a certain dress size- it got it wrong, I didnt have to lose another 1.5stone to drop down 1 dress size.

Ive also asked it to do calculations for work before, just to check my own calculations - it got the answer wrong and when I told it to go back and think about it and do the calculation again- it then came back with the correct calculation and a 🐂 💩 excuse as to why it got it wrong in the first place, it was such a man mentality!!

Don’t believe ChatGPT!

Bikergran · 15/12/2025 19:27

Start by NOT using ChatGPT. It probably equates "desirable" with looking like a mash up of Kim Kardashian, Bonnie Blue and Jessica Rabbit. I have never looked like this, and have had plenty of partners find me desirable.

RoamingToaster · 15/12/2025 19:29

AI is so agreeable. I’m surprised it doesn’t rate everyone as 10s. Either way if it did say this I wouldn’t take notice.

ClassicalQueen · 15/12/2025 19:31

You must have used a very specific prompt to get that response.

Marmalade71 · 15/12/2025 19:31

Yet more bollox just like the 26 yr old international consultant who also trashes her parents’ house thread.

Please stop engaging with this shite

GreyBeeplus3 · 15/12/2025 19:34

Who cares what chatgpt 'thinks'?
It's a computer thingy which makes terrible decisions
Truthfully what would you have done if this contraption didn't exist?
Got on with it, that's what, bet youre attractive actually
Delete that twatbot now

Wobblylegs1 · 15/12/2025 19:37

Chap GPT told me I was hot stuff, pinched my bum and asked me out for a date.
😆