We’re away for the weekend and DP is as grumpy as hell

[bagpuss90]

Just that - he’s doesn’t want to do anything or go anywhere . We did go out for a bit today and he had a face like thunder. Im walking on eggshells the whole time - he’s so snappy. Whatever I suggest doing its a no. I’ve been so looking forward to this weekend - we planned it together. He’s just more and more like this with everything these days . We are in the hotel room now - have been back here since 3 pm (didn’t go out til nearly midday) and he’s asleep . I could go out to eat on my own later but tbh I’d feel a bit awkward sat somewhere eating on my own. It wasn’t what I had in mind ! I’m seriously thinking of just going home - I could bloody cry though. The fall out will be awful if I leave early 😢

Yessss go for it @bagpuss90 treat yourself to the most delicious food, people watch, take a book if you have one, have a lovely time. And forget him.

Good! Go and have a nice meal and leave him to sulk, then go home tomorrow and end this miserable relationship, don’t waste any more time or energy on him.

You describe this as a change that's crept up. He is sleeping in the day and isn't motivated to do anything. This sounds like depression, which is a mental health problem.

If this is the case, he needs to get support, and regardless of the reason, you need to look after your own mental health.

Well done for booking a table for a meal out. Enjoy! Hopefully you find it liberating.

My partner isn't as bad as yours, but he doesn't always want to do a lot of the things I do. I work less hours so have more free time, so I travel alone frequently. He doesn't have any friends nearby, but I do and I'm very sociable. I also can't sit still and always doing stuff, super active, loads of projects going on. He seems content at home most of the time. I just carry on and do all my stuff I want to do, he gets invited to some things, some he comes along for others he doesn't and it's fine. We don't live together, and I like my space and solitude, and out relationship actually works really well. But we do also do things together and go abroad together, and meet up several times a week.

You are not compatible.
Sorry.

Good for you! I've eaten alone plenty. People really don't take much notice. Take a book, kindle or your phone and read this thread for encouragement. Leave a note saying 'left you to get some rest, see you later' to avoid him making excuses that you didn't tell him.

Oh and ditch him after this. He sounds totally joy less and soul sapping to be with

Poor you. I often go out to eat on my own. I like people watching. Have a think whether you want to spend another 8 years like this.

Raise your bar

He's going to be like that for the rest of your life, OP. Is that what you want?

8 years and you don’t live together? And this is how you spend time together? Leave!!

It really wouldn't. It would be best to leave him and make a new life for yourself

He’s a miserable git who will sap your life of any joy. And will most definitely get worse with age.

Time to call it a day OP

Sounds like my dh.
I've suggested he is really depressed.or he likes to recharge alone so on holiday I go out on my own at home it's awful.
Any chance he is sickening for flu or something or is this the norm.?

So have cancelled first table. Have now booked a table in a jazz bar - I love a bit of jazz . Am able to eat there too 😊

Hope he’s not expecting sex later! I’d have dinner and go home without him!

I love that you’ve gone out and booked the thing that you would really love to do.
Have a fabulous evening of jazz!

Then give yourself the Christmas gift of dumping the joy vacuum!

Excellent. Enjoy 😉

Unless he is unwell, he is being a nob.

Enjoy your evening OP. Jazz sounds fabulous

FUN!

Have a great time.

Sounds fun 💓
Enjoy yourself and think about what this means for what you want for yourself and your relationship

Him not finding any joy or even contentment on life doesn't make it ok for him to make you miserable.

I hope your evening is lovely and that you enjoy Christmas with some of your friends.

You’re doing the right thing OP, I would 100% take myself out for the evening then pack my bags with the intention of leaving tomorrow morning. In fact, I would be asking him to pack his bags and leave whilst I enjoyed the rest of my stay!

Jesus OP you’ve got one life. Just one, this is all finite in minutes, hours, energy, progress, love and enjoyment. All so bloody pointless to sit there getting bullied by a less than mediocre man, who brings nothing but misery to the table. Get out.

Thank you everyone 🥰

Apologies for being contradictory and I have only just read this response.

The plain fact of the matter is that no, OP, it would not be less drama to stay. In fact, it’s going to be permanent drama like this if you stay. You said that you don’t live with him, so end it. That will be the end of the drama and you can move on in peace. You have no need of this nonsense and it doesn’t appear much, being blunt, as though he wants you.. Nor do you have to be in any relationship. Find yourself.