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Original poster

To dump DP after what happened last night

284 replies

Relationshipover2 · 13/12/2025 15:26

NC’d for this. There have been some minor flags around my DP’s drinking in the past but nothing like what happened last night.

DP was on his work do in town and I was expecting him home late. I got a call about 10pm as I was getting ready for bed and it was from his phone - but when I answered it wasn’t him. It was a colleague who told me I’d need to come and pick him up because taxi’s were refusing to take him because he was covered in sick.

I went to get him, he had to be helped into my car by two colleagues propping him up. He was smashed, had been drinking since 2 on an empty stomach and was an absolute mess with sick all down his jeans.

On the drive back he was barely making sense, he kept saying he wanted to have sex and was turned on. I got him in the house after telling him to take his clothes off in the porch and set up bedding on the sofa (I’ve got a spare room but it’s an office and no bed) and left him to go to sleep.

I heard a load of crashing two hours later, he had fallen over into my coffee table (it collapsed) when walking in the dark. He then told me he had not made it to the bathroom in time and had pissed in the corner of the living room. Bullshit because the bathroom is in the other direction.

This morning he still seemed drunk and got funny with me for not ‘seeing to him’ sexually and then said he’d sort himself out and locked himself in the bathroom for ages.

He has finally sobered up this afternoon and claims he was spiked and is going to make a report to the police.

I am 99% sure that didn’t happen but does anyone think there’s any chance that’s true? I’ve never known him to get that drunk.

OP posts:
SpinningaCompass · 14/12/2025 09:30

Relationshipover2 · 14/12/2025 09:02

No he isn’t angling to move in and likes the current set up especially as it works for his children.

He always says it would take a lot for him to agree to live full time with a woman again after his experience with his ex.

Show quote history

Hilarious.

Imagine he was actually the problem in his marriage and his ex and her home is well rid of him.

DeepRubySwan · 14/12/2025 09:45

Only you know whether it's worth breaking up over but you will always remember this. My husband did something very similar when I was heavily pregnant with our first son. He had the car at work so I had to get a taxi to him and back. It was just awful and so embarassing. He peed the bed that night too. I should have left.

DDivaStar · 14/12/2025 09:56

I wouldn't split over one night of excess.

However this seems to be a trend and the attitude to sex would make me get rid instantly.

The lack of apology or respect this morning would be a deal braker.

Bamfram · 14/12/2025 10:19

What a lying bullshitter.
Wouldn't believe a word from him.
Scrambling to excuse his disgusting behaviour.

Off with you because you didn't succumb to coercive sex with a drunken slob.

MeridianB · 14/12/2025 10:26

The lying stands out here. He lied about being spiked, lied about taking drugs.

This won’t be the first time or the last. Talk about showing you who he is (and what he really thinks of you).

Sharptonguedwoman · 14/12/2025 10:38

muggart · 13/12/2025 15:30

no, no way would i end an otherwise happy marriage because my DH had too much to drink as a one off. what an overreaction.

If anyone pissed in the corner of my sitting room I wouldn't think chucking him out was an over-reaction. And he'd be cleaning it before he left.

Megifer · 14/12/2025 10:41

Relationshipover2 · 14/12/2025 09:07

He text me a while after he left last night and said a colleague was smoking ‘something’ (which when I pressed he said was weed) and he had a try of it. He thinks this added to him being sick as he’s never had it before and says he never will again.

Show quote history

Well you can reassure him that unless they specifically test for weed then it wont show. It'll be highly unlikely they'd look for that in a screen for drugs typically used to spike people. Plus, even if it did show, they wouldnt be slightly interested in that.

But, he is obviously bullshitting you. He was probably on coke all day. I dont mind people who have maybe had a couple of lines (none of my business) but people who have nailed it all day have no idea how much theyve drunk and become absolute dickheads.

Hes disgusting op. I do hope you see through his very obvious lies and get rid of him. At 2 years hes barely gone beyond boyfriend status.

MannersAreAll · 14/12/2025 11:08

Has he actually, at any point, apologised for being a disgusting sex pest?

Or is he still simply blaming everyone bar himself?

CalzoneOnLegs · 14/12/2025 11:18

@Sharptonguedwoman me too. It’s unforgivable and if it is in carpet it will soak through to the underlay and floor and will ABSOUTLEY stink and there would have been loads of it too, not a small amount as if it was a puppy or a cat having an accident. poor OP

summitfever · 14/12/2025 12:51

Op he did not have a few draws of a joint then harass you for sex and piss in your house. You need to open your eyes here, that behaviour is cocaine related all day long. And it’s a bloody lot of it as well. Take it from someone who lived with a drug connoisseur for many long, hard years. I am in no doubt about the effects of taking all these drugs in excess and this is not alcohol and weed.

liveforsummer · 14/12/2025 13:07

Nope that sounds like very regular drunk behaviour after the along the drunk on an empty stomach. Nothing like the behaviour when spiked on drink number 1. He’s an arse and this would seriously be the end

liveforsummer · 14/12/2025 13:10

And oops. Dropped himself in it - clearly had Coke as well as copious amounts of alcohol. Cocaine allows you to drink more before getting to this level of drunk hence why he was still hammered this morning

liveforsummer · 14/12/2025 13:11

Oh and the reason he could still get it up when he probably wouldn’t be able to from drink alone

outerspacepotato · 14/12/2025 16:38

Relationshipover2 · 14/12/2025 09:07

He text me a while after he left last night and said a colleague was smoking ‘something’ (which when I pressed he said was weed) and he had a try of it. He thinks this added to him being sick as he’s never had it before and says he never will again.

Show quote history

Oh, come on now.

This wasn't taking a toke of weed. This sounds like meth or coke as well as being over the top drink.

He's got kids. I'd be concerned for their welfare given he's doing drugs and binge drinking and has them at his place. Personally, I'd give the kids' mom a heads-up.

shhblackbag · 14/12/2025 16:46

Sounds like you've started to believe him/make excuses for him.

Good luck with it. If he gets away with this, you'll likely see further repeats.

outerspacepotato · 14/12/2025 16:58

shhblackbag · 14/12/2025 16:46

Sounds like you've started to believe him/make excuses for him.

Good luck with it. If he gets away with this, you'll likely see further repeats.

And he's a liar as well as a binge drinker and using illegal drugs and trashes your place. You'd better check your place to see he hasn't stashed anything there.

gilbertgrape5 · 14/12/2025 17:42

Op if you do decide to end it that’s completely your choice. Likewise if you decide to stay with him. Don’t be swayed either way by MNers who love to scream LTB and accuse you of being a doormat/having low standards/needing more self respect if you don’t. It’s your life and you know more about this person and the overall relationship than anyone here ever could. Wish you all the best.

MissDoubleU · 14/12/2025 21:07

Relationshipover2 · 14/12/2025 09:07

He text me a while after he left last night and said a colleague was smoking ‘something’ (which when I pressed he said was weed) and he had a try of it. He thinks this added to him being sick as he’s never had it before and says he never will again.

Show quote history

And let me guess. You believe that?

So let’s get this right. The prince of piss who sexually harassed you while covered in his own vomit told you this only happened as he was spiked. Swore down it was nothing else and he was going to report it. He admit he lied. He freaked out about his blood and then tried to pass it off as having a small puff of weed, or was it weed? He wouldn’t know he’s never been around drugs before.
Girlie wake up. He was snorting. That’s why he was so horny.

And he has CHILDREN? Jesus Christ OP. He’s telling you his ex was bad..? I suspect she has her own side of things given how bad he is being this early.

summitfever · 14/12/2025 23:07

@gilbertgrape5 with all due respect, have you ever lived with a partner that does cocaine? I guess if you had you’d not be so quick to advise her to even consider sticking it out. it’s a shit way to live and I wish I’d binned my kids dad as soon as I found out he used it, would have saved a lot of people a lot of heartache, most importantly my children.

Theslummymummy · 14/12/2025 23:36

My grandad pissed into a wardrobe once, but it was worse because they were on holiday in a b and b. Tbf he never drank drank again after that.

MySilentLions · 15/12/2025 00:16

Relationshipover2 · 13/12/2025 21:26

I’ve called his bluff re. the spiking by telling him if he didn’t report it then I will. He was very animated tellling me not not to do this and said he’d be in trouble if he had a blood test. He then refused to elaborate.

I told him to leave which he did so he’s gone back to his own house whilst I’m stewing on the sofa with a bottle of wine.

Ah, so he was doing drugs that would show up on a police test then? Almost certainly cocaine I would think. What a charmer.

gilbertgrape5 · 15/12/2025 05:00

summitfever · 14/12/2025 23:07

@gilbertgrape5 with all due respect, have you ever lived with a partner that does cocaine? I guess if you had you’d not be so quick to advise her to even consider sticking it out. it’s a shit way to live and I wish I’d binned my kids dad as soon as I found out he used it, would have saved a lot of people a lot of heartache, most importantly my children.

We don’t even have any evidence that he did cocaine it’s all speculation. I’m not encouraging her to do anything other than make her own choice, rather than being swayed by the emotive language on here which basically suggests that she has no self respect if she doesn’t follow the advice of a load of internet strangers.

WiddlinDiddlin · 15/12/2025 05:41

Ahhhhhh.. the old 'admit to a lesser crime to cover a greater one'..

So you can't report the spiking to the police because a drug test would reveal the tiny toke of weed 'or whatever' he had from a colleague and thats a legit reason for refusing to go to the police over being spiked, as he'd get in trouble at work (or some other spurious reason) and it's not worth it.

Lie after lie after lie.

liveforsummer · 15/12/2025 07:06

@gilbertgrape5 no evidence but the behaviour is textbook including the lies, the being awake and obnoxious and being desperate for sex. The behaviour is not textbook for the less serious thing he’s admitted to so ….

Sartre · 15/12/2025 07:13

You’re essentially asking adults if they would stay with a man who got into their car covered in vomit and then proceeded to piss in the corner of their living room. But then on top of that actually thought you’d want to have sex with him the following morning. What a catch.

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