It’s called reactive abuse. He’s trying to goad you into hitting him so that he can play the victim or he can hurt you back (and severely injure you) and claim he was provoked.
I’m in an abusive relationship. It’s actually text book how these men behave and when they lose their mask.
Mine had his mask slip when we were first leaving hospital with our baby. Ever since then it has escalated.
He would regularly threaten to unalive himself and said he had depression. He also said he was jealous of the baby.
In my case I have a background in family law including in restraining orders, protective orders and recovery orders. I knew what would happen in the Court process in my city and I knew he would get unsupervised contact with our child. I don’t trust him - I trust the Courts even less. So I stay.
There are ads on tv at the moment that say “violence against women - Australia says no” - which is absolutely not true.
His latest method of abuse is to threaten to leave me. He basically wants to see me cry. Somehow he must know that I’m only here because of our child and that he financially provides. He knows I am stuck.
He’s caused so much damage to this house. Fists through doors, he’s taken chips out of the house from throwing things really hard. He’s thrown things at me.
I’m keeping evidence of his abuse. Right now it is not enough to meet the threshold to get a permanent restraining order.
Yes, I have called the Police and I’ve told his family what was going on and they did believe me.