Would you expect/would your family join in with the Tom foolery?

[Pissingitdownquelsurprise]

Had parents and sibling and niece & nephew (late teens) over this weekend
Our Dc is 6 and bouncing all over the place talking to everyone, sibling and DN and DN are quiet people, which I get. Dd asking them if they wanted to play or trying to make conversation, no one really making any effort with her, so it always ends up being Dh and me running around playing with her, doing hide and seek and playing games etc. I totally get that they all probably don’t want to and it’s not much fun, but wouldn’t you give attention..,or at least talk to your little cousin/niece?

Felt a bit sorry for her as she was literally getting nothing back and loves them.

Would depend on my mood. Historically I don't look forward to doing that kind of thing with small kids, including my own, but I found I did enjoy it when I let myself do it. I think by and large, children your DD's age are blessedly unaware of older people not wanting to engage - they might be upset by it in peers but I'm not sure they feel massively rejected in adults/older children don't want to take part.

Some people just don’t know how to play. I imagine teens being too self-conscious to join in kids games. My DS is very lively & chatty, loves being around adults. But they don’t always respond favourably to him, especially if having conversations.

Wouldn’t it be nice if they showed interest/asked questions though, as an auntie in particular or does it not matter?

Yes they sound quite dull! I’m sorry. But there’s nothing you can really do is there, just have to seek out adults and friends/family who are loving and attentive.

if your DD was annoying me by bouncing around and pestering me? I'd tell her to go away, and probably leave if i got the impression you had invited me over to Behold The Wonder That Is Your Daughter instead of having a conversation with me.

I get round this with a "dn, can you teach dd how to play XYZ? She's never played it before" and then walk away before the sulky response

Wasn’t being annoying at all, talking/making conversation…having social skills really

Yes, that’s a good idea

Lively play isn’t always appropriate. It prevents other conversations happening. There’s nothing worse than rowdy play dominating a room where people are trying to talk and catch up with each other.

But you sound nice!

I think it's a shame, and a bit rubbish, if no one is trying to engage with your DD.

However, perhaps controversially, I wonder if it is an issue with the type of games and attention required by your DD. I'm not sure running around and hide & seek are the best games for when people are visiting (unless there are other similar-aged children). Maybe if DD would play in the same room in a bit more of a calm way, the family would find it easier to engage with her.

They weren’t though, they don’t really talk, she gets/keeps the conversation going 😂

I must admit I have zero interest in little kids but to be polite I do engage with them & will join in with there activities to a point, thats just good manners.

She does this too, but she’s an average, active 6 year old. I get what you’re saying though, even an initiation to play cards or ask her some things would be good

Exactly

Why would they. Am confused you would even expect this. My DS had to be reminded the other day that his sister had 2 children not one. Hed forgotten the 9 month old existed

I engaged with my niece and nephew when younger

Do you mean they stayed the weekend or they nipped in for an hour for a cuppa and a catch up.

5/6 hours

How old are niece and nephew?

Then yeah in that time I would of played with little one but only for a bit of the visit and more likely to play with toys or a board game rather then play hide and seek as a guest.

20 & 18

It is a shame that they’re not engaging with her. My DS gets involved with all the younger kids in the family (probably because I do too) and he’s brilliant with them. Not everyone is like him. Some people find little kids tedious. Tolerate them until they leave.

It's nice for them to engage with her a bit, but I don't think they necessarily have to play games with her and centre her. She needs to also be able to amuse herself too. Niece and Nephew probably want some adult conversation as well. While they no doubt care, other people's children may not be that interesting to them.

I’d relish the joy of being a thoroughly trusting child who wants to engage with the olders amongst her. Wow. I have children and as they have grown older I’ve realised that when they want to play/chat it’s because they trust the adults and want to include them. Awww. The adults not realising the joy of playing with children. They will never get that moment back ☹️