Would you expect/would your family join in with the Tom foolery?

[Pissingitdownquelsurprise]

Had parents and sibling and niece & nephew (late teens) over this weekend
Our Dc is 6 and bouncing all over the place talking to everyone, sibling and DN and DN are quiet people, which I get. Dd asking them if they wanted to play or trying to make conversation, no one really making any effort with her, so it always ends up being Dh and me running around playing with her, doing hide and seek and playing games etc. I totally get that they all probably don’t want to and it’s not much fun, but wouldn’t you give attention..,or at least talk to your little cousin/niece?

Felt a bit sorry for her as she was literally getting nothing back and loves them.

Board games. Get them engaged in board games.

Shes not saying shes a brat shes saying shes acting like a brat and thats on you. You need to teach her to amuse herself at times and learn to say Mummy and daddy can't play hide and seek right now the grown ups are talking and your being rude by keep interrupting

Yes this is how I feel, surely you’d want to be kind and take interest in them

So she was constantly pestering them, even after they'd made it really clear they didnt want to play/have childish conversations? Rude, brattish and showing a lack of ability to pick up on social cues. This is not the fault of your child, it's on you to teach her appropriate social behaviour

I’m not boisterous and neither are my dc. Hide and seek is a kids game that kids play with other kids - not so much their adult cousins, especially indoors. I would make an effort to be nice to a 6yo but I wouldn’t be “running around playing”. I would chat or play a board game or card game and so would my dc but I wonder if these particular cousins had the sense that they were getting shoved on the kids table and dug their heels in.

Spot on

And also, having a run around and playing silly games is only awkward at first. It soon becomes quite fun (to me, at least). Especially if you have other family members playing too - getting my strict, elderly Dad involved in a silly game with my niece, who he adores, and my husband is actually so heartwarming.

I think her asking them to play or respond once was fine but they made it clear they didn’t want to so she should have the social skills to have picked up on that and you should have stepped in to stop her becoming a nuisance.

Hide and seek is a game for kids to play with other kids.

Did you just ignore your guests while you played hide and seek with your DD? I’m trying to imagine this scenario, tbh I’ve spat my tea out laughing.

Would be happy to have a good chat, playing games is a no though. It’s a bit rude to be doing that instead of talking to the group I think. Although a family board game? Count me in, lol

She wasn’t acting like a brat, she didn’t interrupt anyone, she wanted to bond and was polite and friendly, that’s all. By the end she’d given up, I said we’d play hide and seek with her in the garden as we often do

Sorry, other people's young kids are annoying at the best of times. When they are clowning around wanting attention, it has the opposite effect on me. And it sounds like it had the same effect on the young adults present too. It is not their job to provide entertainment to your child.

You played hide and seek with your child whilst you had visitors ?

That's even worse so you, your husband and daughter went to play hide and seek in the garden why you had guests round. No wonder they was on their phones you just left them.

Nope, no pestering or repeatedly being brattish or having childish conversations. Have you met a 6 year old recently? A lot of them have a fair amount of interesting things to say.

Anyway i’m assuming you’re on the wind up or one of those awful child hating people…sad.

Not running and hiding and active games though! I have 3 of my own and I don’t expect family to do that with them.

No not at all, she just wanted to chat to her cousins. We played outside in the garden, wouldn’t run around inside with everyone there

I’m on the fence.

I can imagine it’s not nice for your family to come and visit and show very little interest in your daughter. It’s a shame that she was chatting to them and asking them to play, and they said no. Bless her, it can’t be nice for you to see that.

But then…hide and seek? Sorry what? That’s just not appropriate for this sort of setting. And just generally “playing games”… at 6 she should be able to sit and chat. Or have a little toy or something with her as she chats. But I’m sure your family didn’t come round to watch you “play games” with you daughter. Even the way you describe her as bouncing around, she sounds a bit much. Family or not, it’s a bit extreme isn’t it? And in your thread title you call it tom foolery… not everyone goes to visit their relatives for tom foolery with a six year old. She needs to learn to stop bouncing around and being in everyone’s faces, and just chill a bit and chat.

If you don't want your child called a brat, don't let her act like one.

Expecting people to run round after her playing hide and seek at an adult gathering is brattish behaviour. You need to nip it in the bud. Why couldn't she do some colouring or thread some beads or something?

I'm sure your daughter is perfectly lovely, but you're not teaching her appropriate behaviour. She's not the centre of the universe, nor are her wants more important than other people's. In group situations the wants of the majority outweigh the wants of one individual, clearly your DD needs to learn that.

Sometimes it's nice to visit and just have a bit of a quiet break chatting to the person you're visiting.

It does come across as a bit 'behold the wonder that is my child', as a previous poster said, OP.

For a family visit that long I'd be happy to play something mindless and non-physical like snakes and ladders or ludo with you and your child, then have them go amuse themselves a bit while we have adult conversation. Not because I want to play something like that but to be polite and inclusive of your child for a bit. Then that's enough of that.

I have a 6 year old, and I agree with this poster. Constantly interrupting is rude. I’d never expect guests to play physical games with my DC. Colouring in, card/board games etc - better but guests only have to join in if they want to.

Honestly, sounds like your DC is used to attention. ‘Tomfoolery’ sounds intense.

Nope, this was towards the end after she’d been so patient for a long time and they were just sat on their phones. So we decided to get out and play a bit

It’s really great that you find your own and other six years olds so interesting and fun but can you not accept that not everyone does? I have a six year old and adore her, but fucking hell conversation with her can be boring. Playing with my own children didn’t and doesn’t come naturally to me. I’d be horrified and terrified if I turned up to an aunt/cousin or other family member’s house and was expected to play with their six year old.

I think that's pretty rude when you have guests though - to go off an play hide and seek!
My DS loves to talk but I'm aware not everyone enjoys the kind of conversation a young child does so I warn him beforehand it will be mainly adult conversation and get some activities ready for him.

I found six year olds more interesting when I had a six year old. And played more then. Not so interested now.