DH didn’t get DD anything but got his nieces

[Emsieo]

This week DH was in New York on a business trip, he got back this morning. We have 2 children DS is 8 and DD is 6. He also has 2 nieces who are 2 and 4. While on his trip he went to the American Girl Doll store and got a doll for both of his nieces, he told me his SIL sent him the money and told him what to get and it’s for their Christmas. I asked if he didn’t think to get DD one and he shrugged and said doesn’t she already have loads of dolls. She does but she adores dolls and would absolutely love an American girl doll, they aren’t easy to get in the uk so she will likely never have one.
Its upset me that he made all the effort to go to a store filled with things DD would love and didn’t think to get her one for her Christmas. He says if I knew she wanted one I should have told him like SIL did. I feel as a father he should have been able to think for himself and get her one.

AIBU?

There is more chance to children of that age seeing it as just a doll than them caring that it is an American Girl Doll. The only ones that care are SIL and OP.

Does she even want one?

OP has clarified that her DH actually did similar.

He is not husband of the year just for bringing home a load of junk and OP’s dh is not a bad dad for not investing £200 in a doll.

She could have said that in the original post and chose not to.

Wonder if the voting would be different if she had since I see a lot of posters thinking that he brought nothing back for their children.

She doesn't seem bothered that the son didn't get a special present. I find that more of an issue than dad not buying a special present for one of his children.

Poor little boy.

Am I the only one that thinks this isn't a big deal? If your kid is so infatuated with the idea of an American doll, then you would have sent him with strict instructions to get one. She has a lot of dolls, and now you're pouting because she doesn't have another one to add to the pile. Sounds like a you issue. Let your nieces enjoy their dolls, their pile might not be so high.

He wasn't shopping for his nieces randomly, he was doing a specific favour for SIL.

If your DD already has lots of dolls I quite understand why he wouldn't think to spend an inordinate amount of money on yet another.

would absolutely love an American girl doll, they aren’t easy to get in the uk so she will likely never have one.

Sorry but so bloody what? She'll join the millions of girls around the world who'll never have one and be just fine, I promise. World ending it ain't. There are lots of lovely dolls out there and I'm sure she'll have a nice Christmas with lots of presents regardless.

Do you only ever buy your DC things they have specifically told you they want?

Cba to read the thread but your husband is an arse

he’ll try to make it your fault but he is an arse

Agree.

I also wouldn’t call anyone tight for not paying almost £200 on a bloody doll!!!

The outfits for the dolls are more than I spend on groceries a week.

There's no fault or blame to apportion! This is a complete non-incident.

I could see dh doing this and me being annoyed with myself for not asking him to get a doll too - you didn't think - neither did he.

@Bagsintheboot
what? The useless DH goes to a shop and doesn’t think to buy his own children a gift ?

Fuck me your standards are low

I wouldn't buy anyone a triple digit gift they hadn't specifically told me they wanted. Nevermind 2 of them.

Sounds like he can only do something when given instructions…

If my DH spaffed that much on a doll "just because" despite the fact our DD already had lots of dolls, we'd have bigger problems.

What did he get your son, @Emsieo ?

It would seem even odder to me if he came back with a gift for your daughter in addition to his nieces but hee haw for his other child.

When they’re hundreds of pounds, yes.

He might not have meant to be an arse (as a pp suggests) but it shows his clear lack of thought and regard for his daughter. I’d be annoyed.

Would you be happy if your DH spent £100+ pounds on a single doll without telling you and having not discussed it earlier?

When it's a £150-200 toy for a 6 year-old? Yes. I don't have to get it from their mouth but I make very sure that I'm buying the gift they'll treasure most and certainly make sure that I'm not just getting them whatever their cousin is getting while I'm in the shop.

And it didn’t occur to him to check with you whether your own daughters might want one, after his sister suggested the idea? What a wet wipe.

Or he might have thought “what a massive waste of money”

He did bring back some sweets you can only easily get in the US and a magnet so it’s not that he didn’t get them anything at all.

OP chose to add later.