DH didn’t get DD anything but got his nieces

[Emsieo]

This week DH was in New York on a business trip, he got back this morning. We have 2 children DS is 8 and DD is 6. He also has 2 nieces who are 2 and 4. While on his trip he went to the American Girl Doll store and got a doll for both of his nieces, he told me his SIL sent him the money and told him what to get and it’s for their Christmas. I asked if he didn’t think to get DD one and he shrugged and said doesn’t she already have loads of dolls. She does but she adores dolls and would absolutely love an American girl doll, they aren’t easy to get in the uk so she will likely never have one.
Its upset me that he made all the effort to go to a store filled with things DD would love and didn’t think to get her one for her Christmas. He says if I knew she wanted one I should have told him like SIL did. I feel as a father he should have been able to think for himself and get her one.

AIBU?

Or maybe, and hear me out,

You knock the patronising shit on the head and stop being so controlling

I’m not really sure what you mean. My post was meat to be lighthearted with a touch of sarcasm.

Some of us are not psychic and don't know how your post was meant.

How? From the OP:
I asked if he didn’t think to get DD one and he shrugged and said doesn’t she already have loads of dolls
So he did think about it and decided against it. Or, he didn't but when asked he came to the same conclusion he would have done if he had asked himself in the shop so same outcome. And nothing to suggest his viewpoint that it wouldn't have been a great present for her anyway isn't just as valid as OP's.

My guess is that, although this doesn’t sound particularly ‘bad’ of the husband, he’s always thoughtless/useless so this is the straw that broke the camels back for OP

Absolutely zero evidence in the OP's post that the DH is either thoughtless or useless. Just an assumption that the DH (despite plenty of evidence to the contrary) must be useless because of course all men are.

This kind of mindless 'all men are useless' pile on by a bunch of women on this thread plays to some of the worst stereotypes about women and makes the thread an embarrassing read.

So, erm, don’t read it then?

I have read and commented on it as I see fit. As I can do for any thread that is shared for public comment.

You speak like someone from the 1930s. Modernise your language a bit

Exactly - not everything is a battle.

Also OP - you don't need to get your daughter a $130 dollar doll on a whim - just because someone else has one.

My first thought was "sil asked him and paid him the money" the title is misleading. Had he bought them as gifts from himself. I would of seen your point. But! He didn't even think of this himself. He was asked and paid. He probably was a little annoyed he had to do it at all. It isn't something he thought about.
Had he been gift shopping and not on a business trip. He may have had a different thought.
He wasn't away having a jolly good time. He was working. I mean maybe he networked as well. But certainly not there to relax.

I am not going to take language lessons from someone with a MN name as vulgar as yours.

OP there’s a website called dollstoysngifts.co.uk if you message the guy - Simon - he can order one for you from the US at a really reasonable rate!

Slightly more expensive but there’s also mydollcollection.co.uk who are in the uk and sell the .

@Idontdobumsex It’s called being educated and well read..
Nothing @Futurehappiness has typed sounds anything like a 1930s vocabulary! Simply, educated.

Oooh! Vulgar! Get the smelling salts out!

Unless DD has been consistently asking for an American Girl Doll, I don’t think it’s particularly poor to not knee jerk buy something just because you’re doing a favour for your sister. DD would have loved the doll, but it sounds like she’d probably love a lot of different dolls. I don’t think I’d have bought one if I’d been in your DH’s position. Better to sit down and really think about what you want to get her for Christmas than pick something up just because her cousins are getting the same thing.

The sodding dolls are 18 inches tall (Wikipedia). The SIL is as unreasonable as they come! Bonkers

I agree that they are generic but the fact they are so popular and have stories about them and such cute accessories, it makes them "special". Especially since they cannot be bought in the UK (which I think is royally dumb).

Personally, if I was going to buy a nice doll for a little girl, I'd look for Kidz 'n Catz, Gotz Happy Kids, Gotz Hannah or look for an older 18" Robert Tonner doll on ebay. All have great hair and the Kidz and Happy Kids are jointed, which is fun.

That was really nice of you! If OP decides to get one from there (and the price is not that bad), I suggest not getting one with braids or curls, though Julie's little braid is not bad. Nanea, Isabel, Nicki and Julie have the easiest hair. Nicki has really beautiful hair and eyes and I love Julie as she is a "60's" girl.

Sorry, Julie is a 70's girl. Aged myself more than I needed to. 😉

I think you're being ridiculous. Your DD wouldn't even notice, unless you make a big deal out of it. Your SIL had a specific request and sent the cash.

Eighteen inches!? They’re almost as tall as me! And he had two of them. How on earth did he manage? I bet questions were asked at check-in when they saw two lifelike heads poking out of his luggage. How the hell did op expect him to manage 3 of the things!!

Hmmm , I’m sure you’re more than 18inches . Lol

It's quite weird that she's upset her daughter will never have one of these dolls.

I would wager most american girls will never have one of these dolls. Because their parents can't afford them.

It's very interesting that people think he's a bad father because he didn't spend over a hundred pounds on a doll when she's already got so many.

Our Generation dolls are a cheaper equivalent and widely available here. Get her one of those and if she doesn't play with it much you know you didnt waste your money.

You can’t be 1 ft 6.