Would this be embarrassing in your family?

[Lorecan]

I know it’s only trivial but it’s hit a nerve.

So my family finds everything embarrassing. As a result I’m rarely able to say anything meaningful or share a soppy toast ona birthday for example. I think it comes from Dh who finds any expression of emotion saccharine. DC have followed suit.

Yesterday we watched Baby Boom (in memory of Diane Keaton who is a fav of mine) and I really enjoyed it. As the credits rolled I raised my mug and said “RIP Diane”.

Apparently I was being embarrassing! I’m hardly a soppy git and quite low key myself but it would be nice to occasionally be a bit more emotional

anyone else have families like this?

I felt embarrassed reading that but I'm an emotionally repressed, heartless monster.

A bit cringey but each to their own. I say this as a big Diane Keaton fan.

I cringed reading that tbh

I would think someone was making a joke if they toasted a dead celebrity with their mug. That's not not being emotional. It's just quite odd a thing to do.

Is it THAT cringey? People go to lay flowers and wail for strangers. I was very low key.

I’m sick of living in an emotionless vacuum

I don't think one can really embarrass themselves in front of family tbh.

It’s a bit cringe reading about it but maybe less so in person?!

I think it's because you come across as "performative".
You could have said "aw it's such a shame she died I love her as an actress". That's not cringey or embarrassing.
But to raise your glass to the dead and say RIP is performative behaviour, that's what's embarrassing them x

I'm an extremely empathetic person. The byproduct of that is that I probably cry more than most people. That said, I'd have cringed a little at this.

YANBU! Jesus Christ guys, not cringey at all, just a nice little nod to DK!

That’s what I thought. We watched it specifically in her memory!

Nope, not at all. And we’re not into celebrities at all. But emotions are allowed in this family. Expression of emotion is allowed. Appreciation of others is allowed.

It's the jarring mix of the public gesture in a private space that makes it cringy. A toast to someone is a little ritual of public performance. It's for a group of people in at least a semi-formal setting.

Someone doing that on their sofa in front of just their family would make me laugh.

No one in my family would have been embarrassed but they would have thought you were being a bit weird.

Are these teenagers, though? You embarrass your teenagers if you do anything except skivvy for them silently and, frequently, even then.

I dunno, I think it sounds quite sweet really, as long as it wasn’t done too sombrely.

Teenagers are programmed to find everything we do as cringe as fuck.
I remember DS once saying my face was embarrassing. Im not that bad looking. I think it was just that I own a face.

I cry at everything which is embarrassing as is talking in public, walking near them, I think having a parent is embarrassing. Your DH is just immature.

I didn’t say it in a dramatic or mawkish manner. just a normal, neutral tone of voice

I think the wider issue is that you feel you can’t ever express sentimental stuff without feeling weird?

It’s normal for teens to cringe at any visible emotional display from the adults in their lives, but less so for those adults to cringe at emotional displays by other adults. I’d find living like that unbearable personally.

I (very) frequently cry at TV and film; my kids are mortified but I don’t care, and I would never choose a partner who never showed any emotion or sentimentality at all.

They’re just being weird tbh. And even if it’s cringe, so what? The safety of your own home should be where you’re free to be as cringe as you want.

My brother is one of those people who finds everything [others do] embarrassing and it gets annoying fast. When we used to hang out with him, we’d constantly be told off about… everything. Poor DD couldn’t catch a break around him.

We barely speak anymore and as sad as it sounds, I don’t miss him. You can’t live your life performing for strangers.

I’m so sorry, I’m British and possibly English so it’s awkward.

Unless it’s a dog and then I’m onboard.

I think it’s really sad you can’t say some nice words on someone’s birthday if you want to. We don’t go in for that sort of thing verbally but we write nice soppy things in cards. Is even that verboten?

It's not remotely weird to briefly nod to someone who passed away you were a fan of. And even if it were, so what? You are allowed to be weird and eccentric if you like.

English?! Autistic 😂😂😂

But what about all the people queuing up to pay their respects to the Queen? I was paying my respects in a very understated way. Im not one for worshipping celebrities but I’ve always admired DK. Plus she’s been in films that are extremely nostalgic for me. A quick line is cringey?