AIBU to think my American neighbour is taking this too far?

[MelaniaLovesLemon]

She’s already invited us to Thanksgiving (yes, in September) and has given me a little to-do list...
Bring a casserole, make miniature turkeys out of whole walnuts(?), and have something prepared to say about what we’re thankful for, and I need to bring my own chair. She’s quirky, loud and brash with a weird husband, and has a habit of turning up unannounced with crazy schemes.

Recently she came for an aperitif in our cute garden, and practically inhaled the entire tin of prawn cocktail Pringles that I was saving for my DS and then simply helped herself to another glass of wine without asking, apparently she wants that wine for the dinner?

Another time she invited me round at 9am to taste test three different types of stuffing, for the Thanksgiving. I could not possibly eat all that at 9am!

I don’t know if I’m being rude thinking this is all a bit much?

1. Are you American & in the US?
2. Just kindly decline. I couldn't be standing that absolutely nonsense behaviour.
3. If in UK, decline No is an acceptable answer. You could if feeling like it explain why we don't celebrate Thanksgiving. Plus you have a previous engagement.

No. Just no.

I’m here to find out how you make miniature turkeys using walnuts!

Just say no. We don’t celebrate thanksgiving here in UK so just don’t go.

Tbf, there isn't a whole lot to be thankful for in the UK at the moment, so I'd tell her I'm giving it a miss.

I'd just say no thank you if you don't want to go. If I'd invited someone for a drink on my cute garden (?!) I'd not let their glass go empty and provide enough snacks.

Mate, just say no.

Thanks for the invite, unfortunately we won't be able to make it.

Done.

Just say no thanks, don't give it a moments thought.

How is your garden cute?

If you are in the UK then you need to breathe deeply and tell her it’s too much for you and we don’t even celebrate this bloody thing. I had a US friend in the UK and she would enforce everyone she knew to celebrate every festival going (literally, including Hindu, Muslim, Bahai ones). In the US, you’ll need to learn to suck it up I’m afraid! 😧

YANBU not to make turkeys out of walnuts

YABU to be stingy with pringles and wine

Oh no not an American with traditions from outside of the UK. How awful for you😖 Hope you're ok.

'It's lovely of you to invite us, but I don't think I'll/we'll be able to make it (afterall). Hope you have a fab time though.'

Just tell her you can't make it.
But only after you've found out and told us all about the walnut turkeys

How do you make turkeys out of walnuts? I’m intrigued 🤔

She obviously annoys you. If she's a nice person and good company then I would just laugh off some of the eccentricities.

I think it's really nice that she's invited you for Thanksgiving. It's the most important American holiday so it probably doesn't seem so strange to her to plan it in advance. Asking you to bring a dish and to think of something you are thankful for is quite normal. The walnut turkeys is a bit bizarre! I'd probably be saying no to that (though I'd find out a bit more first, might be a relaxing way to pass the time, you never know...)

You're being a bit uptight about wine and pringles.

If fundamentally she gets on your tits then just try and reduce contact hope the invites dry up.

she sounds fun to me. I’d go. Lean in to life, that’s what I say. If nothing else it’ll give you something mad to tell your other friends about.

make miniature turkeys out of whole walnuts(?)

https://thesavvyage.com/homemade-thanksgiving-nametag/
Who knew this was a thing - they quite good.

Well if my DC were intereted might give it a whirl - but frankly it sounds like a lot of work for an invite and if your feeling that way just politey decline.

I don't really get all the "We don't celebrate Thanksgiving" responses. If an American friend (or nice potential friend) in the UK invited me to their Thanksgiving dinner, then I'd say yes if I was free, just as I would to any other party/dinner invite.

You don't 'get' people not all being the same?

Obviously it's up to you but personally I think it's lovely to be invited. Walnut turkeys aside I think its just nice neighbourly behaviour.

Being annoyed with her for eating snacks you put in front of her is a bit mean.

Tell her you're thankful that you're not going

I don't think the invite is odd - it's the amount of things they apparently want the OP to bring - craft, wine and a food dish.

It's more normal in UK to turn up with a bottle of something and maybe if BBQ some burgers - it's more on the host to provide stuff - though image that just a cultural difference - I suppose big family christmas it's more normal to bring food along to help out - we don't tend to do those in our family.

Here you go

I’ve spent many thanksgivings in the US, absolutely lovely tradition imho. Not once has it been such a fuss as your friend is making it, just a rollicking good meal and a good get together, I’ve never been anyway here where they’ve actually given thanks, I thought that was just in movies, lol. I’d say no if the person giving it annoyed me though.

I can’t believe you’re upset about a tub of Pringles and a glass of wine for someone you invited into your home.