She’s already invited us to Thanksgiving (yes, in September) and has given me a little to-do list I think it’s quite odd that you’re so unimpressed that she’s invited you in September. Isn’t it a bigger celebration than Christmas in some parts of America? Don’t you know who is coming for Christmas dinner two months beforehand?
Bring a casserole, make miniature turkeys out of whole walnuts(?), and have something prepared to say about what we’re thankful for, and I need to bring my own chair That’s their culture, it’s how they celebrate. She’s inviting you to join in with her and her family and celebrate it the same way they do. If you don’t want to bring a casserole then tell her you’ve got something on that day. If you don’t want to spend an afternoon sodding about with walnuts, then laugh, tell her that’s insane and you’re not doing it. Presumably the request for you to bring your own chair is so that you’ll be comfortable with the stick up your bum.
She’s quirky, loud and brash with a weird husband, and has a habit of turning up unannounced with crazy schemes Ah, so this is why you don’t like her. I think she sounds interesting. And you sound very much like the sort of person who neither understands nor appreciates any degree of quirkiness whatsoever. And that’s fine; it wouldn’t do if we were all the same. But perhaps a bit of understanding that you aren’t coming across as particularly ‘average’ yourself wouldn’t go amiss.
Recently she came for an aperitif in our cute garden, and practically inhaled the entire tin of prawn cocktail Pringles that I was saving for my DS and then simply helped herself to another glass of wine without asking, apparently she wants that wine for the dinner? Is ‘cute’ another way of saying ‘tiny with artificial turf, a couple of potted plants and some outside lighting’? And aperitif? 😂 Did you lay on some riparian entertainment next to your water feature? If she has to ask for another glass of wine, then maybe you aren’t being a very good host. Perhaps she’s under the impression that you’re her friend and that you’re past that level of formality.
Another time she invited me round at 9am to taste test three different types of stuffing, for the Thanksgiving. I could not possibly eat all that at 9am! Then tell her! ‘Mate, it’s 9am, I’m not doing a taste test for anything other than cereal at this time of day. Just pick whatever you like best, I’m sure it will be lovely’. What’s wrong with that? She knows where she stands and you’ve drawn comfortable boundaries.
I don’t know if I’m being rude thinking this is all a bit much? You’re expecting her to understand British, when only the British and long term residents understand the British. We’re very different culturally. I think you’re being a bit unfair to both of you to a) not make allowances for her doing things very differently, b) not setting boundaries so that both of you are comfortable and c) hiding the Pringles.