Old-ish man on the route to the Co-op who keeps saying hello

[RogueFemale]

I moved house last week and already have noticed this man. He lives on the short (7m) walking route to the local Co-Op. He's maybe mid 60s, tall, heavy build. He is always standing outside his front door, and he loudly says hello every time I go past. I ignore him.

I'm 60 and am used to being invisible.

So it's not a leering hello. I also thought maybe it was accidental he was standing outside before, or something, and just a cheery 'local' hello.

But I went past twice today (to Co-Op) and he was there both times, hello-ing, and I'm finding it quite weird, that he's always standing outside his front door.

I'm going to be going to the local Co-Op a lot, so what do I do?

AIBU to continue to ignore him and just doggedly go past for years pretending he's not there?

Not the point but I read 7m to mean 7metres and I was wondering how you could live 7m away from co-op and he lives in between? Anyway, I assume you meant minutes.

Either way, just say hello, it’ll be fine. Or don’t, imagine that’ll be fine too.

What if he thinks you’re mentally ill for not responding.

Try it out. Say hello back or a wave without saying the word hello. If he gets creepy, keep walking and don't say hello again.

How is that my responsibility?

You dont have to say hello but would it really cost you anything to do so?

What a depressing thread.

I must say "hello" to 20 strangers a day while out walking the dogs - I've made some lovely friends because of it and it's always nice to have people watching out for you.

Maybe he thinks it weird that you're always going to the Co-op. Maybe he thinks you're mentally ill for going there twice a day.

Where I live (large village Lancs) absolutely everyone says hello. It seems quite normal that if someone sees you walking past regularly they would acknowledge you.

Are you always so miserable?

I think you are the weird (and miserable) one in this scenario.

Maybe he thinks there is something weird about you walking to the co-op multiple times every day? Just say hello back. (Or choose a different route or another shop.)

Perfectly happy if he thinks that.

Me too. Always been a walker (not like in the Walking Dead, for exercise …). When I got into my 60s, because of things that some friends and family said and which I, possibly foolishly, listened to for a while, I began to feel a bit nervous in certain circumstances, where I never had before. The effects of that really got me down and actually began to limit me.
So, I decided not to be so ridiculous. My hitherto perfectly safe town and its environs was still equally safe. As a tall, lithe, fit woman I was still very able to take care of myself (barring a gun or knife but frankly age is irrelevant in those circumstances).
So, one evening I tried an experiment. A lone man walked towards me on the deserted coastal path. I smiled and said a cheery hello. Couple of young lads in hoodies on foot, couple more on the woodland path a mile on, on bikes. Same approach. Group of giggly young folk heading into town. Assorted people of various demographics over my several mile walk. Hitherto and for years I had my earphones in and acknowledged barely anyone.
The response was exactly the same from every, single person I spoke to. Broad smiles and good evening or hello.
Obviously, purely anecdotal but it taught me a thing or two. I’ve carried on and the response I get has overwhelmingly been pretty much the same.

What leads you to think he might be mentally ill, just the fact that he said hello when you walked past? Gently, that’s a bit bonkers.

This.

OP is perfectly within her rights to get a bad vibe and find this unwanted attention creepy. She should trust her gut. Everyone saying how mean, be kind etc, do you have any idea how many women are assaulted each day by men or have inappropriate comments made to them?

No woman owes a man their attention or politeness if they don't feel comfortable.

The fact that he is always, always standing in the doorway of his house, any time of day.

I can understand that if this is completely outside your sphere of experience it makes you feel uncomfortable. Hopefully everyone commenting with similar tales will put your mind at rest. Just say hello as you walk past. In the very unlikely event that he attempts more of a conversation don’t engage, just keep walking. I doubt he will though. There’s a chap round the corner from me who does this. In fact, if I were to walk to the co op I’d go past him 🤔

Is this a genuine poster?

You think he's mentally ill because he says hello to you??

Not him with the problem imo...

Maybe he is mentally ill and likes to say Hello to everyone. Just say Hello back.

I'm glad I live in a place where it's normal to say Hello to people even if you don't know them.

I’m in my 60s. I always say morning/afternoon/hello to everybody. I think it’s you who is the weirdo.

Context? Really? Unless he’s standing there in his pants and shouting ‘Ello darling’, I think that’s probably a bit of a stretch.

Apart from anything else, if he's saying hello several times a day and getting blanked, he should get the hint she doesn't want any interaction. Continuing is intrusive and, yep, creepy.

@Biblio4 Thank you!!!