What would your husband say if he came home from work and you’d had a drink?

[khlolea]

I have had a glass of wine tonight after work, thought why not?
Dh is home and is furious, speaking to me like a disgrace and slamming cupboards.
I now have an uncomfortable silence which isn’t quite a silence because he’s saying he’s not giving me the silent treatment.

I would find it a bit odd if I came in from work at 5.30, and found DH had had a beer after picking the kids up from school whilst making their tea etc on a Monday evening. But he’s a light drinker so that would be out of the ordinary. Even before we had kids, it would be unusual for either of us to have a drink before 7pm on a working weekday.

I definitely wouldn’t shout and sulk at him though! I’d just shrug it off and maybe join him for one later.

“How’s your day been?”

Me too!

Ugh he sounds like a horrible man.

So you had a glass of wine. And?

Did he grow up in a home with an alcoholic?

"Hi darling"

My DH probably wouldn’t really even notice. He certainly wouldn’t comment. A performance like that would be so far out of character I’d think he was unwell.

I think we have different views on alcohol, my parents had the occasional glass of wine with dinner and our family socialised with bbq and drink but his mum once went mad when we had a drink in her garden one day.
I think he thinks drinks are for special occasions or holidays but to randomly have a drink on a work night is alcoholic behaviour and totally derogatory

Me and Dh never drink at home unless else have friends round. We used to, about 15 years ago but got out of the habit. We drink pints of water in the evening.
We have loads of alcohol in,from both our 60ths parties that people left or gifted.

About a month ago it was really hot and I had a day off and it was lovely sitting on my swing egg chair.
I just fancied a long vodka lemon and lime so treated myself.
I told dh when he came home and he said 'good have you had a nice chill day' I had, and i hadn't had a drink since.

He would say 'hard day then' as I drink alcohol about once every 6 months and would had to have gone out to buy it, which is an effort I would not usually make for alcohol 🤣. He would then probably join me unless he had a load of meetings planned the next day.

He'd join me or not, depending on whether he wanted a glass of wine. Maybe he'd have a beer or a coke instead.

Unless there's some missing context (you're a recovering alcoholic, you'd previously agreed to drive him somewhere in the next hour, you've drunk his wine he was saving for a special occasion) it's not his business. And even if there IS a reason for him to be concerned or upset, insulting you and slamming things around isn't a reasonable way to express that.

He’d be surprised if I was drinking on a weeknight so would probably comment but definitely not judge. Most likely comment would be to ask if I had a bad day and to want to hear about it and help.

He’d definitely be surprised, but would probably say ‘bad day?’ or similar.

Your husband sounds awful if this is how he’s reacted.

I would be very surprised if he isnt controlling in other ways. That is an extreme reaction.

Did you drive home after drinking?

It’s the only reason I can think of for someone to be cross about someone else having after work drinks.

He would chuckle and be impressed, I hardly drink and I think he wished I drunk a bit more.

He’d be a bit surprised maybe because I don’t usually drink in the week, but more in a ‘everything ok on a Monday night?’ type raised eyebrow way, he’d definitely not be slamming cupboard and acting like I’d done something hideous!

Is he usually like this? Have you ever had a drinking problem?

His reaction is unhinged!

He'd probably like one too! He's more likely to unwind with a drink than I am.

Your DH getting angry is way over the top. Unless there is more of a back story to this!

He wouldn’t say anything, would join me I’m sure.

From choice?

I can't imagine not having a drink when I fancied one, surely that's a benefit of being an adult

He'd phone my sponsor and organise and intervention 🤣 (5 years sober)

He’d say ‘ooh let me top you up’ and pour himself something too! Mind you I think he’d be pretty surprised as I rarely drink and I don’t fancy drinking alone.
He’s usually the one having a glass of wine or a beer while cooking but not really outside Thursday-Saturday.
Why is your dh behaving like this do you think?

I very rarely drink. My husband would never put me down about it. He'd probably say something like "ah good, you deserve to relax".
Your husband is being unreasonable.

It’s a pretty OTT reaction. Having a drink on Monday night is not a sign of complete degeneracy or worth huffing and puffing about.

Either nothing at all or “on it already?” In a jokey tone.