To think most men are filthy losers

[fightbackorriseabove]

I'm going through the menopause, so have a low libido at the moment, which might explain my disgust. I don't know. I didn't use to be a prude, but I'm feeling more and more annoyed these days by men and their general behaviour.

I have a few male friends who, to varying degrees, always manage to slip in an innuendo or even an outright sexual remark. And out of politeness, or not wanting to cause a scene, I smile or roll my eyes in jest. I can only think of one occasion when I told a bloke to stop, and he REALLY took the hump. This was a married man who pursued me, but then said he was just joking and that I took myself too seriously. In fact, he got very angry.

I have lots of personal issues at the moment. Mad stuff. One of these issues lead to me googling my ex.

Well, the filth I found was disturbing. Men, thousands of them, masturbating online. I can only think they're doing it in front of each other. Becsuse there can't be many women wanting to sit and watch them. Surely? My ex was one of them.

I'm not talking about Only Fans where people pay. I'm talking about sex webcam stuff where men seem to just be filming themselves wanking. And watching each other. I don't even think it's gay. These are heterosexual men doing it for free. All ages.

Maybe I'm naïve.

But it's been a real eye opener for me.

I always knew men watched porn. But sitting there filming themselves and watching each other. It's madness.

I really do think that we, as women, spend our time worrying, working, caring, thinking, planning... and men just do the stuff thry have to do and then go back to messing with themselves or pestering women. Including their wives. And they keep having to up the limit because they can't get excited uness it's something really vile.

How many of us have felt obliged to have sex with a man, a partner, to avoid his anger, sulking, grumpiness. We've chosen sex as the lesser of two evils when we didn't want it.

It's not a human right, is it? They need to calm the fuck down.

Maybe I'm being unreasonable and grumpy, but I just think most of them ming.

They are utterly revolting creatures.

I'm a bit confused, OP.

You're planning on initiating a harassment case because you did some online stalking and found he was looking to meet fat women?

That makes no sense. He's not even focused on you by the sounds of it.

What the fuck?

Definitely agree with most of this. Even in my pre-meno libido surge, I remember being very disappointed at how little there was to the men I dated after the sex (I enjoyed the physical side). Once they'd finished shagging, it was about 3/4 of their personality, just gone.

It's like it's almost their whole identity. Wanting sex. Thinking about sex. Being turned on. Looking at women. Like dogs in heat.

I actually found that hyper sexual stage of life irritating. It interrupted real life and I'd masturbate to get rid of the urge for a while, to regain my focus. Now it's passed, I love the sanity and focus I have. It was such a huge waste of energy.

I also don't know many men who are the equals of the women I like and admire. Over the course of my life, I've known maybe 10? Good, well rounded people. Who don't ogle and lust and put their own needs first, always.

Yeah I am so over men. I keep hearing stories lately that disgust me - repeatedly cheating on their wives, risking breaking up their families constantly chasing sex. It's really affected my trust and I can't see me wanting to get into another relationship.

You're absolutely right. It's not how humanity is meant to live.

Mary Whitehouse was absolutely right. No one can argue otherwise now, with the evidence all around us. It really was always going to go this way.

I'm sorry you have had to endure this horrific man.

‘Initiating a harassment case’ and ‘did some online stalking’?!!
OP you do realise that stalking someone can also be deemed harassment?

This is a very scary thread. How do you people meet these men? And surely you just shut it down!
I’ve had 3 ‘creep’ interactions in my life and they all just looked mortified when their behaviour was challenged.
1- A friends boyfriend grabbed my bum, so I extremely loudly said ‘Oops have you mistaken me for said friend’. The reaction was pure embarrassment at being caught.
2 - Friend of DHs gave me his number for when I ‘was done with him’. Again loudly said DH needed better friends if they felt it was appropriate to hit on friends partners. Again utter embarrassment and apology.
3 - Acquaintance at a bar got a bit handsy to which I more subtly told him to ‘remove his hands from me this minute before I make a scene and get him removed’.
He just looked mortified and apologised.

Maybe I’m around different men but in all three occasions I genuinely felt that nobody had ever called them out on that behaviour before so they were more surprised than anything.

This kind of reads like you all went to the worst Chinese takeaway in town then claimed all Chinese food is horrible.

If you feel your partner has nothing to offer aside from being a tool for sex then I'm sorry but you chose a lemon.

No, I don't want to get into the harassment case. I don't want to go into it. It's a lot more than the website stuff. In fact, the websites have nothing to do with it. I just thought they could be used in my favour. To show his character. This man has stalked me for years and is currently causing me no end of issues. I'm sorry if there was any confusion.

Sadly @fightbackorriseabove I have to agree with you. It's not all men, but most. Even the 'good' ones have misogyny ingrained deeply into their veins. And yes, they think having sex is a right for them. And God forbid you rebuff a random man's advances, you get called slut, whore, bitch, cunt, all manner of names. Most of them also have the potential to be violent and aggressive. (Some are.)

Fuck knows why girls and young women have the idea drummed into them that they 'must get a man!' Many men are more trouble than they're worth. No wonder some women are staying single these days, (once they have left a bad relationship.) And some younger women stay single full stop. Even the younger women who end up in a couple/staying coupled up, are choosing to not have children. They are wising up. For most women, once children come along, it's a life of domestic drudgery, because most men do fuck-all (as you said,) except the very basics. And your career is affected, and your earning potential, because you will ALWAYS be regarded as the primary carer.

And many men do NOT like to look after women when they are ill. Even my own DH who is relatively OK as men go, rolls his eyes and huffs and puffs when I am ill (very rarely I am ill too,) and moans because he has to wait on me for a day or two. I dread ever getting very ill and infirm (when he is still OK,) because I think he will resent looking after me. As well as having to do everything else/all the life admin/housework/domestic duties.

It's no surprise that a lot of men fuck off and leave their wife if she becomes very ill and unable to take care of herself. (eg; if she gets cancer, alzheimers, parkinsons, MS etc.) Women are far more likely to stay if their husband becomes ill, even if the marriage is average, or not good. Men are more likely to leave if it's the woman is ill, even if the marriage is OK.

It's in mens genes to be selfish, self centred, and lazy. And yes, many of them are sex mad, and porn mad, and the men in their 40s, 50s and 60s (and even older,) feel entitled to attention from women half their age. They think women their own age are repugnant and 'past it' but think they are still attractive, as well as hot, sexy, youthful, charming, and funny. (LMFAO!) Men also make up the vast majority of thugs, violent attackers, and killers.

Seriously, they do not deserve women!

Not to mention the new breed who can't actually be arsed to have sex, would rather endlessly watch other men having sex. So fucking odd, I have no skin in the game, happily single

The Giselle pelicot case opened my eyes a lot what a brave woman.

My dad was in the prison service for his entire working life. During the riots, the prisoners would run around like lunatics raping each other. Men who weren’t even gay.
So many men are absolute deviants.

A whiny response to genuine fears and concerns about men, how original.

I think it's fabulous that you managed to call them out. Not many women are as assertive. I'd like to be. My mum certainly was. I'm not sure why I rarely manage to do it.

I don't believe I was stalking my ex when I looked online. I was gathering evidence for my case. I searched once and looked once at something he is doing on a public, free site.

This man really has and is stalking me. It is now a matter for the police and the court. That's what I'm going through. And I don't deserve it. I said no. A no is a no. I've been followed for three years and received hundreds of letters, poems, postcards, flowers, gifts, emails, and voice recordings. 50 hours of voice recordings sent to me. That's not normal.

Anyway, my point wasn't really about him. He's clearly insane. It was about my surprise at all the men on there and how common this must actually be. And that got me thinking about my own experiences with men.

Hmm....almost like men aren't an oppressed group, isn't it?

Hands up, not read the whole thread , only the OPs posts so what Im posting may have already been posted

@TheGodsOfTheCopybookHeadings sorry my love but you have a duty of care , as well as a duty fir all females , to teach your son how to behave around women

You need to draw a line under his involvement in your life and concentrate on here and now. You cant change what's has already happened, but you can change tomorrow

Gross victim blaming

Seriously, why don't all the manhaters just become lesbians and set up their own island somewhere?! They tried it in Finland a few years ago.

Even those who aren't raping, beating women up, cheating, trafficking, torturing... Just your average Joe is probably doing something he wouldn't want anyone to find out about. They're grim.

op this just seems way too much and I’m really not a fan of men at the moment! And calling anyone losers … I just feel like everyone now asssumes all men are what most men aren’t but in the same way men think women are naggy, money grabbing etc etc. The world seems to have forgotten we all have flaws and act like idiots sometimes.

I can take that on board. Calling them losers was a bit weird. I don't know where that came from. I think I was feeling down and cross. I hope you're right and that I'm wrong. My words have definitely been coloured by my recent experiences.

There are maybe 5 men in this world who I know, and respect. The rest revolt me. Extrapolating the percentage of creeps to the general population tells me everything I need to know about mankind and how women should protect themselves in response.

The internet is proof enough.

I have found, if you scratch the surface, an alarming number of them are into weird stuff.

No you've just met a pile of cunts and chosen to being in relationships with a really bad one.

Right. I keep hearing this bizarre, illogical comparison on mumsnet. Some women really are other women's worst enemy.

Comparing men to other demographics simply does not work because men ALREADY incorporate ALL other demographics as do women. Women and men are the only two demographics which can never and do never incorporate one another's demograpic.

Men/women stand completely alone as a demographic as two halves of the human race, each containing all other demographic traits - race, age, etc - within their groups. They are NOT isolated categories like race or class, rendering the comparison of the group "men" with the group "race" absolutely meaningless.

And furthermore men as a sex class have been irrefutably proven throughout our entire recorded history and in all cultures and geographies to be dangerous to women as a sex class.

No other demographic - religion, race, age, class, ethnicity, or culture - shows a comparable, consistent pattern of danger towards women as a group.

I am sick of this illogical nonsense by women who throw other under the bus to gain male cookies.