Over 4 years of broken sleep.. I've asked partner to take a break from running so I can rest, now he's grumpy.

[Taurini]

So long story short, our 4 year old daughter might possibly be suffering from sleep apnea and we are waiting for the results of a sleep study to then take the next steps.

4 years of broken sleep for me because our daughter is constantly waking up from choking on what I'm assuming is her giant tonsils and adenoids.. she's waking at least 2-3 times a night and it's rare she sleeps though a whole night.
My partner is a heavy sleeper and doesn't hear her and I only wake him if our daughter specifically asks for him or I've barely had any sleep as I know he works hard and needs his rest.

I'm beyond exhausted, it's messed up my body so much I'm having a heavy period every two weeks, I keep becoming anaemic and my hair is falling out so much I'm having to use rogaine.. I'm 34..

He's really into his running, has roughly an hour to himself every morning to run/work out.
He's recently been out for almost a whole weekend at a festival with a friend.
The other day he had been for almost a two hour run on a Saturday training for his next 10k run.
Then mentioned a half marathon and then a marathon.
I snapped.. its not fair hearing he has all this energy and all these plans when I don't even get a full night's sleep..so I've asked him if he'd stop his running until we get our daughter's sleep apnea sorted and watch her in a morning so I can get some rest.
He's stopped but is very grumpy about it and now on top of no sleep Im having to feel guilty..
Am I being unreasonable?

@Taurini Has he been consistent with doing some parenting?

I’m glad you’re getting to a GP and that your partner is stepping up a bit too. Fingers crossed all goes well at the GPs and they listen. If it helps, make a list ahead of time of all the things you want to raise. I find it helps me not to forget anything and give a complete picture. It can also help if you have an idea of what you are hoping to get out of the appointment in terms of further tests and follow up so you can circle back to it at the end.

Update: my partner is doing well stepping up so far.. those liquid iron sachets people recommended have been a god send!
I had bloods taken Tuesday and I read the results online on Friday and my Serum ferritin level is 22 ug/L [13.0 - 150.0] but they're taking no further action apparently because it's within their "normal" range bracket.. even though if you look it up anything under 30 is anemia.
I was put on Tranexamic acid to try and it made a big difference to my period, so I'm calling first thing Monday and asking to see if I can have it put on my repeat prescription and a referral to gynaecology.
Hopefully if I'm allowed to keep taking Tranexamic it'll make my periods light enough so that I can eventually build up my iron levels even if I do still have a period every two weeks.
& Hopefully once I see a gynaecologist I can get answers to see what's been happening with my body.
Thank you so much everyone for your advice and listening to me moan, it means a lot x

I’m glad to hear things are looking better for you now OP.

22 isn't normal. I felt like death. You need to get much higher, 70-80 ideally 100+. if your GP tells you 22 is good, I'd suggest you change GP. it's very very low.

Another update:
So I had a telephone appointment with a doctor today.. I tried to get the one I saw last week but she no longer works at the surgery 😞

The doctor on the phone was male.. he wasnt very pleasant and was adamant I didn't need iron tablets and told me as I was in their normal range I'm fine.
He also refused to put the Tranexamic acid on repeat prescription, apparently it's not allowed on repeat it was only a trial.. I asked what the point in a trial was if you're not allowed to continue with it 🤷🏼‍♀️

In the end I ended up getting quite angry and upset as with the previous doctor we had this plan and that after the blood results she would refer me to gynaecology and I felt like he was going back on everything discussed at my last appointment.
In the end I demanded the iron and Tranexamic, he's given me one more prescription of both and I'm not allowed any more after that.. he's thankfully referred me to gynaecology still.

I've looked at my notes and he's put that I was crying down the phone and that i wouldn't let him explain things fully etc etc.. 🤦🏼‍♀️

Literally fed up of doctors.. especially male ones..

That's disgraceful, and you should write a complaint to the practice manager to this effect. You have a right for your medical notes to accurately reflect the discussion that took place, and you also have a right to continuity of care. Aspects of your care discussed and agreed upon at a prior appointment should be followed through on.

Apologies if I have missed this, but have you asked at your Dr's surgery if they have a GP who specialises in Womens Health? Be it Gynae or Menopause. They may well be a lot more helpful.

I know not all Dr's surgeries have someone in this role, but I believe many do?

Were you crying?
Is that false?
I absolutely think you should make a complaint and if you weren't crying but annoyed that is very serious.
You agreed one thing and now he's ddnying it and ridiculing you.

Put it all down in an email and say you want to make a complaintvand what is the procedure.

Pompous twat.

Quite a few people have complained to the practice manager and nothing has ever happened 😞

I'm not sure, I haven't been offered this even though I've told the receptionist the problem.

@Taurini At the very least, you have a right to accurate information being held about you. They must fulfil their basic obligations. You could cc your MP.

I did start to cry yes, because he wouldn't let me explain that at the last appointment it was agreed I'd "trial" the acid and if it helped I could stay on it and that if I still wanted to referral to gynaecology I could still have one.

Also the previous doctor said if my anemia was lower than she liked (50) then she'd put me on iron..

I'm at 22.. so if she was still here if have been put on it.. and he was adamant not to, and adamant I couldn't have the acid on repeat.

So I started crying, and I said it feels like I'm having to go over everything once again and there was a plan in place and now you're changing it all.

& He kept telling me I wasn't letting him explain.. and his reason for the iron was that I was in the normal range (13 - 150) and as people have stated here, anything under 30 is far too low and in need of prescription iron.

He also told me the reason I cannot have the acid on repeat is because it can cause blood clots.. according to the NHS website you can absolutely have it on repeat prescription for heavy periods.. so he is telling me completely different to the NHS.

No matter what I said or asked or told him.. the answer was no.

Apart from the gynaecology referal.

I kept telling him that I know none of the above is a long term solution and it isn't supposed to be, it is there to help me get my iron levels up to stop me feeling ill and stop my hair loss until we find out why I'm having heavy periods every two weeks and then see where we go from there.

He kept trying to tell me I needed to just go on the pill or have the coil.. which I had discussed at the previous appointment and stated I do not want to go on the pill due to the side effects I get and I definitely do not want the coil.

In 2011 I was diagnosed with suspected endometriosis and no more investigation was done because I was on the pill and that's apparently the treatment for it.

Since then I've had cervical polyps grow and bleed also.

I most likely need all of this looking at and removed, I'd quite happily have a hysterectomy if they let me but I highly doubt they will be willing to.

I have severe endo. The minipill made a world of difference to me. it completely stopped my periods, much less pain. it was something my endo consultant suggested (or the coil). I wouldn't dismiss either and give it some sort. it's not a magic cure but it can help to relieve bleeding and symptoms.

You can buy iron tablets from a pharmacist for a few pounds, you don’t need a prescription. I recently read that low iron levels can cause heavy periods, so I’d definitely aim to get your iron levels higher. Make sure you’re eating a very healthy diet too (lots of veg, chicken, fish, etc). Regular exercise will also help (I’m sure you know all this).

OP’s hair is falling out, she’s anaemic, she’s suffering heavy periods every fortnight and people are telling her to get out for a run?! Jesus wept! You poor thing OP, your husband sounds like a selfish twat.

I haven't RTFT so apologies if this has been mentioned but it would be worth getting checked for PCOS
In most cases that causes a long gap between periods but for me my normal cycle for many years was one week on, one week off

I'm on over the counter iron tablets, liquid iron and have an iron rich diet and it's taken roughly 7/8 months to get my ferritin from 11 to 22.
The last doctor said I need prescription strength to get my levels up faster to help stop the hair loss.
But now this other doctor won't help.

How are you feeling now, @Taurini ? Has your partner kept up the help? How is the exhaustion?

22 is still rock bottom!!!! You need iron infusions. Go private and get them done. You won’t get them done with the NHS. Until you have infusions and also make sure you take B12 and vitamin c alongside them or the iron won’t absorb properly

The exhaustion is still here.
Ran out of the prescription iron tablets so taking over the counter ones and liquid iron.
I have one periods worth of tranexamic acid and have a feeling I'm going to have to fight the doctors to get it on repeat..
Thankfully I have a gynaecology appointment at the beginning of November for an ultrasound and an internal one, hopefully I will get to talk to a consultant and explain about the doctors refusing to give me anymore and they can make them give it me.
My partner is still being very supportive, but the exhaustion just keeps getting to me.
My hair is STILL falling out.. so at this rate I will have to ask for a referral to a dermatologist which my doctors probably won't be happy about either 😒 got a lot of fighting to do.

I don't understand how he can be looking t the woman he loves suffering the way you are and not be falling over himself to do more. He's despicably selfish.

Op it sounds a nightmare don’t worry about the drs they are there for us not themselves just get all the help you need on the nhs.

Tiny wee suggestion ..when chemo wrung me out like a rag post surgery my naturopath suggested a tonic of iron and ginseng root... Really helpful. Getting strength up is vital before making serious decisions. Good luck.