Why does he remember everything I post

[Janelizzy]

I have been talking to a man from out of state intermittently. I don’t take it seriously; the conversation is enjoyable, and we have a lot in common, but I don’t have high expectations for it.

I’ve noticed that he remembers everything I post on social media and brings it up. If we go a week or two without talking, he reminds me about my posts. For example, I posted a picture of my cousin's arm while we were out for dinner, and he mentioned that I go on dates. When I denied it, he responded, saying, “You were on a date last week; arm on your story.” I can hardly keep track of my own social media, so how does he remember everything I post?

I recently told him that I haven’t had a drink in months, and he responded, “You had drinks a few weeks ago; you posted it.” He seems to remember everything—every picture and every quote. I have watched so many movies on Tubi; maybe I’m overreacting since I haven’t even met him yet. However, if I decide to take a leap and see him, are these concerns valid?

The he started bringing up other women while I was on the phone with him

He’ll be like “I’m tired of stupid women, why is this girl texting me”.

“The restaurant you showed me, I know the girl that works there”

“On the plane they have barf bags, when I was on vacation with this girl she used one”

later that day he called me
update he called me later that night, I’m visiting his state soon cause I have a family reunion down there planned. He sent me some hotel suggestions, yet got soo upset when I wouldn’t tell him what hotel I’m staying out. He said well why are you being weird why won’t you tell me what room you’re staying out he was almost yelling. Then told me that I didn’t need to rent a car, that I could just drive his …..

I know this is all over the place but why is he acting like this ….. why does he care especially since he said he’s not looking for anything serious

It’s Jekyll and Hyde, as in Dr Jekyll and Mr Hyde. It’s not a woman called Jacqueline High.

First time? You know what do but I am guessing you enjoy the attention?

The OP has posted about this at least once before and ignored all the advice that time and will probably ignore all the exact same advice this time. Probably because he gives her money so she’ll keep dragging it out.

What do you mean once hooked he won’t let go? I don’t even live in the same state as him ? We’ve been talking on and off since may. I ended things with him the first time

You ended things and went back …. OK

You don't need to understand his individual psychology. Just disengage.

Completely agree that she is taking this behaviour as a compliment.

A pp said that he is doing it because he does care. He obviously cares but not in the way you think he does, OP. This isn't a sign that he doesn't understand himself or what he wants, nor is it a sign that he is just a bit of a hopeless case and needs a good woman to rescue him.

His 'care' doesn't extend beyond caring about himself and how he feels. And he doesn't feel attraction, interest, love or devotion as you may be reading it. He feels anger, a sense of entitlement and a right to demand and control.

But you don't want to hear that and you won't see it for yourself.

You want people to tell you that you just need to give him time and that it's obvious he cares about you. But no one is going to tell you that because it patently isn't true.

What you need to do is block him and protect yourself.

So why won't you do that?

Jacqueline High 😆

He sounds great OP, he gives you money, he’s super friendly, interested in what you’re doing, cares about where you’ll be staying and you can even drive his car… I mean, what’s not to love?

Go for it

I was wondering whether this is the same poster who kept ‘jokingly’ asking online paramours to send her money.

Very similar writing style.

The comments about your sm posts indicate he’s studying every little thing you post. That’s not normal, most people take an interest but to study posts and photos and make up scenarios isn’t normal behaviour (spotting someone’s arm and automatically presume it’s a man’s and you’re in a date). It smacks of intense jealousy.

Talking about other women sounds like the start of negging, he’s trying to make you jealous and then passing it off as you being jealous when you call him out on it.

No one, and I mean NOONE, should be upset when you don’t give him your hotel details, an emotionally stable man wouldn’t ever ask and understand why you won’t give it.

All of his behaviour is the start of some emotional abuse, controlling, jealousy in its extreme. If he’s like this before you’ve even met, imagine what he’d be like when he’s hit his feet under the table and he’s relaxed and comfortable.

Id suggest you tell him the dates or locations have changed for your upcoming trip, because you can bet your bottom dollar he’ll be scouring your sm posts and those of your friends to try to locate the address of the function and local hotels to find you. Then pull back, block and please be careful.

All the red flags here!

Sounds like the start of a horror movie

He acts like it because he is a massive red flag. Why on earth are you still in contact with him, how big a red flag do you need?

Never meet this man, stop contact, red flags are everywhere

If you ended things why are you still talking to him?

It's a power game to him. He is stringing you along.

For your own sake get rid. He's not into you, he's into stringing women along.

What clarification do you need? There isn't some mysterious underside to him, he's been lying to you and he wants to control you. Run away, quickly.

There’s clearly something in this relationship for you. Maybe you like the idea of somebody seemingly obsessed with you? Or it’s a distraction from something worse?

Whatever the reason you could stop it tomorrow, you have no links, only a keyboard. But you’re not going to, so I just hope he’s not the lunatic he appears to be.

There’s clearly something in this relationship for you. Maybe you like the idea of somebody seemingly obsessed with you? Or it’s a distraction from something worse?

Whatever the reason you could stop it tomorrow, you have no links, only a keyboard. But you’re not going to, so I just hope he’s not the lunatic he appears to be.

Honestly I would just block him now - it sounds like you haven’t met him yet? You say he’s like Jekyll and Hyde, he sounds obsessive and jealous, you said you ended things “the first time”, and he got angry when you wouldn’t tell him what hotel you’re staying at. All red flags. Plus you’re confused about his behaviour which is never a good start to a relationship.

How did you get talking to him in the first place? When men try to start LDRs online it often makes me wonder why they can’t manage to meet anyone locally in real life who will have them

Maybe hes got a photographic memory and doesnt understand social norms about social media.

Hes maybe really interested in all you do. Or hes maybe a mad stalker. Difficult to tell.

He could be kind and helpful letting you drive his car and hoping to get to visit you during your stay. And hoping for a relationship but scared having just come out one. But maybe hoping for sex.
Or he could be a dangerous rapist.

Whatever he is youre just wanting to work him out but maybe it’s be safer to take a step back. As others have said youre sharing too much on your socials with a guy you don’t know.

RUN.

jacqueline high

🤣🤣🤣🤣 lmfao
Robert Louis Stevenson gets a gen Z makeover...

@Janelizzy what do you even want out of this thread?

Im not victim blaming her, if it's the same person as i think, he was sending her gifts and money which she was happily accepting

Survival instincts of a baked potato

Seriously OP, block, delete and move on. You cannot be so desperate for male attention to think any of this is not deeply worrying.

He will have taken screenshots and probably worked out where you live/work/your connections etc

Because he will keep drawing you back in and you will keep letting him. Block him, he’s a total weirdo and you have nothing to lose by doing so, this isn’t a serious relationship, just block him why are you leaving this door open.