To be so annoyed about the dangers of being a woman?

[Givemeanamethen]

I like to run or go for long walks. I ususally listen to music or books or whatever.

There are some lovely long circular routes near me through woods and along streams. I do do them, but am always slightly on edge because it’s so big that you can go a while without seeing anyone, and if I pass a man I can’t help but think ‘if I was attacked here no one would hear’. I try and do these at busy times, be finished before it starts getting dark and I’d never do it in the rain because of how quiet it would be. It irritates me that men, of course, won’t have to consider any of this.

Tonight, I didn’t have time to go there so did a four mile route from my house. It’s pretty and got a ruralise atmosphere but the roads are relatively busy, for a Sunday night, and there are plenty of houses. I don’t ususally worry at all on this route.

But this evening, some fucking dickhead cycled up behind me, on the path instead of the road, and shouted right in my ear, clearly to try and frighten me and embarrass me, then he and his friend cycled away.

I’m so angry that I can’t even go on a walk without men getting a buzz out of harassing me.

Not even really sure what my AIBU is but I’m so angry that I could cry.

Don't let them win. You can't live in fear.

I honestly cannot believe that you’ve come on to this thread to explain that it’s also a problem for 16 stone, 6ft 2 men. It is in absolutely no way whatsoever comparable, and your post is beyond tone deaf.

Honestly, this has angered me as much as the man shouting in my ear. You have absolutely no idea whatsoever what you’re talking about.

Wow seriously,, you think it's ok to come on this thread to mansplain that? Read the room. You, I am afraid, are part of the problem.
How insulting and belittling

On Friday a teenage boy who stank of weed rode his bike directly at me. Pulled a wheelie at the last minute nearly hitting my face.

It took every last shred of self restraint not to knock that little fucker off and kneel on his windpipe. It flashed through my mind that if I started hurting him I simply wouldn't stop.

They start abusing women so young and I'm sick of them ruining women's lives.

Oh look, a woman is talking about her fears and a middle age man has to come and centre himself.

Op yanbu, it's absolutely shit, I have teen daughters and the stuff I have had to explain to them to keep them safe just shouldn't be needed.

And, of course, if you react and say anything you run the risk of escalation.

You are absolutely deluded.

It’s honestly unreal.

That ship sailed already.

.

Absolutely. It is thoroughly depressing.

Hope you’re ok op. I’m so sick of this shit. I had a guy on a moped riding up and down the road a few weeks ago, shouting to me as he followed me. I wanted to scream at him to fuck off but I just stared straight ahead and acted like I couldn’t see or hear him.

It's not because you are male that you are part of the problem, it's because you are male and think it's totally reasonable to tell a woman she was not threatened because she was a woman. You have no right to say that.

@Yabberwok I'm with you. Everyone lately seems to be at risk from hopped up idiots. I have teenage sons and I have taught them basic self defense. We are all at risk.

🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄

I actually worry about my son too, not just my daughter. There are nasty bullies out there who will start a fight with anyone.

I'm glad I've not felt scared whilst running in rural areas but I have when running through the more built up areas with gangs of guys walking along.

I’m really sorry you feel Like this. I’m very lucky that I’ve not experienced this sort of abuse from men and I just don’t know how I would react if I did. It sounds awful.

You do not feel as threatened as women do and you are not as threatened as women are.

I don't think women are at any greater risk than men. I'm female and I don't generally consider myself vulnerable.
There are some places and times where I might be more cautious, but my husband would probably say the same.
Women can't hide themselves away, or live in fear. And it's also not fair to assume that all men are somehow to blame.

And then you tell nice, decent men, and some of them tell you ‘I’d have definitely said something’. Just genuinely clueless.

I don't think women are at any greater risk than men.

seriously?

What risk does a 16 stone, 6ft 2 man have walking past a lone man in a deserted part of a wood whilst running. What risk?

Teach your sons to make sure they say hello, or cross the road whilst following a woman, or to pretend to talk loudly on the phone if behind them to alert the woman that they’re there and are (probably) no danger (just found out my partner does this if he ends up walking behind a woman whilst going home after the pub shuts and was pathetically impressed).