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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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To think that white British/ American etcmen are just as much a threat to women as migrants?

843 replies

malificent7 · 08/08/2025 12:47

I am not excusing grooming, paedophile sex rings and unmonitored immigration at all but I hate all these protests.
I know that my white male ex teacher is a sex offender. Not to mention the Epstein scandal.
Aibu to think that ALL men are a danger to women...not just men of different ethnicities/ religions etc?

OP posts:
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mondaytosunday · 08/08/2025 13:41

Yes any man can be a threat (as can a woman). I would not phrase it as ALL men ARE a danger to women though.
Looking at government statistics (which are limited, and in this case covers years 2012-2017) sexual offences (rape, assault or other of females, males and minors) 64% found guilty were perpetrated by people of white ethnicity, the remaining made up of black and Asian at around 6%; mixed, Chinese at about 1.5% and not stated at 20%. It does not specify the proportion of those that are male/female or other.

mondaytosunday · 08/08/2025 13:43

Should say that is for each ethnicity (so 6% for black, 6% for Asian etc)

niadainud · 08/08/2025 13:48

mondaytosunday · 08/08/2025 13:43

Should say that is for each ethnicity (so 6% for black, 6% for Asian etc)

That still doesn't add up to 100%!

Does it say how that compares to the make up of the population of the UK?

Coockooclock · 08/08/2025 13:49

No one is saying it's just the men of different ethnicities/religions etc though.

DiscoBob · 08/08/2025 13:51

I don't think that migrants are more likely to be paedos, no. Most of that happens with people in positions of trust, known to the victim. Priests, teachers, nursery workers, youth leaders, parents/ relatives, mothers partner etc.

Not so much a stranger leaping out of a shrubbery. Though of course men of all backgrounds do commit crime against women and girls.

miraxxx · 08/08/2025 13:53

This reply has been deleted

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PollyBell · 08/08/2025 13:53

So does your son know this if no son your father etc.?

I presume you are only in same sex relationships?

LoverOfTerriers · 08/08/2025 13:56

Yes, any man could be a threat. I do think there is an issue with men for
certain countries where women are treated as little more than animas bringing their attitudes here though.

But also think there’s a growing problem with white western men being radicalised by the likes of Andrew Tate and uncle culture too.

The problem is I could talk about the latter, but if I tried to discuss the former, I’d be called a racist and told to shut up.

We should be able to talk about male aggression in all its forms and no matter its cause, without being shut down.

mathanxiety · 08/08/2025 13:57

How did you get the idea that it was just men of non white ethnicity?

Darragon · 08/08/2025 13:58

Personally I think some people are complete idiots and some people are just faux naive to suit their political agenda. Not sure which applies to you OP.

YouWillFindMeInTheGarden · 08/08/2025 14:00

Unregulated,unaccounted for males can commit multiple offences undetected

your neighbour/teacher can be found and dealt with

miniaturepixieonacid · 08/08/2025 14:01

Yes - though I'd definitely say any man rather than all men. Many men would never be a threat to anybody. But there's no way of telling who's who by looking, I agree.

I do think men coming out of some cultures and backgrounds are more likely to be violent than others - but some of those cultures and backgrounds are predominantly white.

RantzNotBantz · 08/08/2025 14:06

I think opportunity has a lot to do with it.

Look at the Jesus Army documentary. Many men must have been involved in abuse, because they were protected. They had free rein.

In many countries the law and culture protects men so they take advantage.

Just like white British men, given half the chance.

MiloMinderbinder925 · 08/08/2025 14:08

Sexual offences are usually by someone the victim knows such as her partner or ex partner, colleague, family member, friend and stranger attacks are rare. Conversley, stranger attacks are more common with male victims.

I think the weaponisation of VAWAG by the far right is despicable especially since they're not adverse to giving women a good kicking themselves.

For example: https://www.thedetail.tv/articles/almost-half-ni-race-rioters-reported-for-domestic-abuse

Almost half NI race rioters reported for domestic abuse

The figures for Northern Ireland – 48% - were higher than the UK average (41%).

https://www.thedetail.tv/articles/almost-half-ni-race-rioters-reported-for-domestic-abuse

Crochetandtea · 08/08/2025 14:16

I disagree . A quick google shows that the Uk has a lower rate of violence against women than the countries lots of immigrants into the uk are coming from.
chatgpt offered some percentages which are quite frightening. Women really are just second class citizens in some countries . You’re fooling yourself if you think those men change when they come to the UK.

To think that white British/ American etcmen are just as much a threat to women as migrants?
To think that white British/ American etcmen are just as much a threat to women as migrants?
CatchMeWhenYouFall · 08/08/2025 14:19

I've been raped by 2 (separate) white men and sexually assaulted unpleasantly and invasively (all separate to each other) y 1 white man and 2 black men. More minor public sexual assault by 1 Roma man. Apart from the last, all were British (or had a local accent, anyway).

Agree OP. It's not a migrant problem. Nor do I see it as an every man problem - I've known a fair few men who have been genuinely horrified by this sort of thing. I've also known men who professed to be, but I knew to actually be multiple rapists... It is not every man, but is an issue with many men, though. I sort of presume everyone male is a sexual risk until I've known them long enough to know if I trust them or not. If I don't know them well, or have ever had bad feelings about them while knowing them, I view them as a risk. Only one minor sex assault since I took this view...

DeLaRuiz · 08/08/2025 14:20

I think the problem recently surrounds men that have no respect at all for women, culturally. Their culture is that women should hide and disguise themselves. They think women belong to their parents, then to their husbands, like an ownership thing, as if they were goats.

ThatCyanCat · 08/08/2025 14:21

MiloMinderbinder925 · 08/08/2025 14:08

Sexual offences are usually by someone the victim knows such as her partner or ex partner, colleague, family member, friend and stranger attacks are rare. Conversley, stranger attacks are more common with male victims.

I think the weaponisation of VAWAG by the far right is despicable especially since they're not adverse to giving women a good kicking themselves.

For example: https://www.thedetail.tv/articles/almost-half-ni-race-rioters-reported-for-domestic-abuse

I think the weaponisation of VAWAG by the far right is despicable

You're not wrong... however, the left as it currently is is handing this to them on a plate by demonstrating its own total indifference to women's rights. It's also driving people towards the far right by telling them that they are already far right for holding entirely reasonable views based in fact.

I hope it's changing but it's not there yet. The right thinks women are private property and the left thinks they're public property.

Serpentstooth · 08/08/2025 14:22

anniegun · 08/08/2025 13:59

The biggest threat comes from the type of people who protest at migrant hotels "to protect our women and children" Two in five arrested for last summer’s UK riots had been reported for domestic abuse | Domestic violence | The Guardian

Agreed. There are far more of them than migrants and the Relationships threads on here will show that.

ilovesooty · 08/08/2025 14:22

Darragon · 08/08/2025 13:58

Personally I think some people are complete idiots and some people are just faux naive to suit their political agenda. Not sure which applies to you OP.

Now what political agenda would that be? Are you in the habit of implying that someone might be an idiot because they disagree with you?

PhilippaGeorgiou · 08/08/2025 14:24

YABU for starting yet another goady thread on the subject. We see you.

AnneLovesGilbert · 08/08/2025 14:25

Have you looked into readily available data you can provide to back your assertion up or are you just here to signal your virtue?

MidnightPatrol · 08/08/2025 14:26

I am slightly curious about the enthusiastic importing of men from countries where women are seen as second class citizens.

Not from a sex offences view, but just a broader perceptions of women in society.

Crochetandtea · 08/08/2025 14:29

To answer your question .
I think women in the UK are at a higher risk of violence from men who come from countries where there are higher rates of violence against women.
We have a huge problem in the Uk and being kind and inclusive won’t solve it.

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