To be fuming over her cancelling hobby

[thatsalad]

There is a hobby I do that's hosted by someone who is away for the whole summer, so she put another regular in charge of hosting. We always get less people coming in the summer due to holidays, but we still crack on.

This person who is now in charge pushed for it to be paused in the summer due to low numbers, so she posted a poll in the group chat and literally every single person voted they don't want it to be paused, cue few weeks later and she informed us it's being paused until september.

Aibu to be fuming over her ignoring everyone's votes in the poll and making a unilateral decision? Aibu to ask her why she has done that or even messaging the actual host to complain about her behavior?

But it is ok. At the end of the day it's entirely up to her whether she hosts or not.

So no. You shouldn't say anything.

No, you should not.

Hobby groups that exist by the good grace of volunteers should err on the side of caution by being extremely polite to anyone who volunteers even if they don’t do things the way you would like.

The only reasonable response is to either offer yourself as host next year or hold your tongue.

Things change OP. When she put the poll on she might have been able to manage. Now she can’t. Get over it. You sound too invested.

Do you spot any irony at all in arguing about your AIBU poll responses, while moaning about this lady also not following her poll?

but if she thinks she doesn't have to follow the poll, then why do you think you have to follow her decision to ignore the poll and stop the meetings?
Neither of those things are legally binding.

If you're so keen for the group to carry on just say 'Hi Jane, no worries if you're busy over the holidays but from the poll it seems like a few people are still up for meeting, so I'll be in the pub/bell ringing tower/local dogging car park at the normal time next week, hope to see a few of you then, and we can all have a big catch up once we're back to normal in September.'

If she had said "I'm so sorry everyone, but I'm unable to continue hosting. Either we can pause, or, as the poll results suggest people want to continue, someone else can host." Would that of changed the outcome? At the end of the day she absolutely can step back, regardless if the poll results. She shouldn't be made to feel guilty about that. She may have many reasons. I understand your view, but I don't agree with you.

That is irritating.
I guess she didn't want to host in the end.

Yes but something unexpected in her life may have come up - something private she doesn't necessarily want to share yet.
It's only a few weeks.

Of course it's NU to ask why she's made the decision when the poll suggested otherwise.

It's never unreasonable to ask for clarification, especially regarding a matter you are directly involved in.

Well then she can simply reply that something out of her control has come up.

It's really not rude to ask and it doesn't force the person to share something they don't want to.

I'm not arguing, I am responding to people's questions

It’s perfectly reasonable to be privately grumpy about it, it’s not reasonable to upbraid her about it, as a pp said she may have very good reasons.

I wonder where the OP stands on receipts?

Maybe the OP hasn't given her chance yet.

The question was not whether it is ok for her to not host, it's about her posting a poll and then ignoring the results.

I feel like I'm speaking French with how people in here consistently misunderstanding what I'm saying😂

What do you even want from this thread. It’s fine to be mildly put out. Fuming seems excessive

This would annoy me, but I think the thing that would annoy me most is that the temporary host agreed to take over for the summer when she clearly either can’t or won’t do it, for whatever reason. It would have been much better if she’d declined to take it on in the first place.

I’d guess that the only reason she did a poll was in the hope that the majority would vote to pause so that she wouldn’t look like the bad guy when she paused the hobby.

Having said that, I don’t think that messaging her or the usual host to complain would achieve much. No one can force her to host the hobby, no matter how upset you are about her making a unilateral decision to pause things.
Is there any way that you or anyone else can step into hosting things?

You host if you want to continue over summer

What I wanted is people's advice on whether to speak up about her ignoring the poll. I'm not fuming, the title was just an overdramatic choice 😂

You keep having to explain because it ridiculous.

Of course she’s allowed to ignore the results of a poll saying she should if she doesn’t want to host. No one has any right to her home even if ticked a box on a WhatsApp poll 😂

Absent of any other information you just look petty and entitled.

Ask her why she ignored the poll.
I'm invested now.

Why are you reacting like the poll was final and binding? I expect she hoped you’d all agree to pause the group so she could tell the original organiser that it was paused by popular request. That didn’t work out for her, so she’s just had to come out and be open about it that she either can’t or doesn’t want to run it until the other person comes back.

I don’t blame you being disappointed by it, but if none of you want to get together and organise a rota for the rest of the summer, then you’re just going to have to wait until September. Either way, you really need to let go of the poll. It means nothing.

Just put on the post 'i thought you posted a poll and everyone said they wanted it to carry on?'

People aren't misunderstanding you, they just think you're being silly.

It's a poll not a legally binding document. Of course she can do what she wants.