To be fuming over her cancelling hobby

[thatsalad]

There is a hobby I do that's hosted by someone who is away for the whole summer, so she put another regular in charge of hosting. We always get less people coming in the summer due to holidays, but we still crack on.

This person who is now in charge pushed for it to be paused in the summer due to low numbers, so she posted a poll in the group chat and literally every single person voted they don't want it to be paused, cue few weeks later and she informed us it's being paused until september.

Aibu to be fuming over her ignoring everyone's votes in the poll and making a unilateral decision? Aibu to ask her why she has done that or even messaging the actual host to complain about her behavior?

Sounds like she's doesn't want to host it. Host it yourself until September if you want it to continue

If it's a hobby that needs a proper instructor (eg. Yoga or similar) then OP can't just step in and take over. Without knowing what it is, I can't see how anyone can suggest a solution- or sympathise.

Did she agree? Or was it just another "you do it" from others, because the OP never said that she agreed - she said it is "hosted by someone who is away for the whole summer, so she put another regular in charge of hosting". That sounds a bit like "muggins can do it" and wasn't really given the choice. Or didn't appreciate what she was being volunteered for. Or something else came up. If the usual host is away for the whole summer then perhaps, if this is her role, she shouldn't be booking entire summers away. How is it "muggins" problem when she isn't willing to forego her summers away for the hobby?

Is there a cost involved in hosting the hobby that means it's not viable for it to run over summer with reduced numbers?

Maybe she wanted to know if you all wanted to continue before trying to make it work. If the majority had said no, she wouldn't have even needed to try to make it work.

The only thing I can think of is that it's a hobby that needs some kind of instruction/teaching/whatever, that the other members aren't qualified to do?

It might not be as easy as someone else hosting or taking turns. Maybe something physical with insurance involved?

Please come back OP!

Is it something that you or someone else can host? That way, the people who want to do it can still do it, and she is under no obligation since it's obviously something she can no longer do.

Like, if it's a book club or something, and she'd offered to have it in her house, then she's allowed to change her mind.

The poll is a bit weird if she'd no intention of doing it but I wouldn't be "absolutely fuming" either.

I'm going to start the guessing... in line with @CheerfulBunny s yoga theme...
@thatsalad is it a sound bath?

There could be a whole host of reasons why she can't do it and had to postpone. Why don't you host it instead of using strong words like 'fuming' or just accept with grace that someone else can't step up to your expectations.

It sounds like those school consultations, which are pretty much tick box exercises as they invariably go ahead with whatever was being consulted on.
It makes a mockery of being asked at all.

It might not be as straight forward as OP hosting herself.

I'm thinking something that requires a lot of space and equipment. Stock car racing? Dressage?

So are you, or one of the others, going to host it instead?

We need more info? Do you pay to attend? Is she paid? Does she volunteer?

If she can't host it was a bit pointless conducting a poll.

I organise a hobby in which I have teaching expertise. Whenever I ask for help with keyholding/opening up, admin, IT or fundraising, there is silence. Yet the times I have had to delay or cancel, messages flood in saying people hope we can get going again soon.

Can't you just message group and continue to meet/do the hobby? Why do you need this stand in person?

What gives you the right to be angry with her? She was doing you a favour!
Host it yourself or zip it. You sound horribly entitled.

The poll was stupid. I see why you’re annoyed that she did that. She should have just said ‘sorry folks but I can no longer commit to hosting this summer so (unless an alternative host can be found) sessions will be paused until September. That part in brackets being because you haven’t specified if it’s something like Bridge that anyone can host so long as they’re up for the organisation or something like yoga that requires a trained instructor. But I don’t think you can be annoyed that she doesn’t want to do it anymore. The primary host takes summers off, it shouldn’t be an issue if she wants to as well. She should have just been honest rather than putting out a bogus poll she had no intention of listening to.

So call her out on it. Ask why she has ignored the results of her own poll!

Right… but if she doesn’t want to host it, and it’s not a paid position, then why should she do it?

You step in if you’re so keen and everyone else wants to go

So she got 'volunteered' by the usual host, hoped to get out of it with a poll voting for a recess until September, then just admitted she isn't going to host.

Good on her, she has boundaries. It's a clumsy thing, trying for a poll to get agreement to suspend it, sure. But the crux of the matter is that she can't or won't host. It didn't sound like she wanted to in the first place and got lumbered with it.

Rather than fume about her online, volunteer to do it yourself.

Did you or anyone else say offer to host it instead?

She obviously can't do it or doesn't want to host anymore and that is her choice.

Well then instead of staying silent and then creating a poll to see what other people thought, “muggins” should’ve just said no from the start instead of messing people about.

I'd be mildly annoyed she bothered doing the poll if she wasn't going to host anyway but I think "fuming" is an overreaction. Like almost everyone else on this thread I'm wondering why it can't go ahead without her if everyone else still wants to do it...

I was going to say this. Why do a pretend poll? She's a tinpot Putin.

I would post on the group asking who else would like to put themselves forward to run the hobby so it continues - and move forwards proactively from there…