To be depressed about my financial situation compared to my neighbors

[greenwithenvy2]

My neighbor is about 59 years old and her husband is 63. She works for the local council as a HR coordinator and her husband, who is now retired, was a finance clerk for the local council.

They have a property portfolio worth around £2.4m (£1m mortgages) so approx £1.4m in property assets. They started their business in the early 90s, when they purchased their first property. They moved home, renting out their original house and repeated this again. With the increase in house prices they were able to remortgage their BTL and buy more property.

We are in our late 30s and are in a very privileged position - we earn a decent wage between us (£140k) and are able investment into our ISA each month but we will never able to have £1.4m in property investment.

I felt so bitter listening to her. They were able to provide gifts for their children to buy their houses and they have now set up companies so their children will inherit their wealth.

I get we are fortunate, but we'll never be able to do this for our children. They achieved this on fairly middling wages as well. I know there are a few other neighbors on our street who've managed this feat and now their kids are sitting pretty.

I felt disgusted at her and at myself for feeling this way.

Comparison is the thief of joy

You have a very decent income and are 20 years younger than this couple. Enjoy your life and stop comparing. 🙄

Plenty of people would like to be in your position.

Good grief.
Recognise your privilege and grow up.

Are you jealous of Bill Gates? Or Elton John? Or anyone that has money or is it just your neighbour. I’m jealous of you for earning such a big salary, does that make you feel better? I’m your neighbours age too and I certainly don’t have a property portfolio. You are being silly and need to get a grip.

This! ^^

How on earth do you know such detailed financial information about a neighbour? Are you intercepting their post!?
keep your eyes on your own work Op - comparison really is the thief of joy!

Your priorities are completely wrong here OP.

Health and happiness are far more important than wealth.

Seems like you have the wealth but not the happiness.

How on earth do you know so much about their financial affairs? As a couple, you earn a wage most people could only ever dream of. This is one of the most moany, entitled posts I've ever read on here. You are right to be disgusted with yourself for feeling this way. Do you go through life being jealous of everyone who is better off than you? Try looking down instead of up and realise how fortunate you are.

They've had 20 years more than you to accumulate their finances. And in fact they're probably much wealthier than most people, not just you. Why should you be bitter about it? Money isn't everything!

I’d feel like a lottery winner on £140k income and able to save. I guess it’s all relative.

i know exactly how you feel. If you had the same opportunities as them, how much more different would your life be? Quite a lot. And sometimes I get a bit bitten by that bug of jealousy and discontent - particularly of people I know at work who own multiple properties because of the lax BTL rules of the 90s/00s when I was unable to get a mortgage due to being under 18. I know as a millennial we feel financially mistreated by the world economy… however what you need to think about now is how to diversify your portfolio, keep increasing your investments and life the life that you are leading. By all Means, feel jealous every now and again but know you could have done nothing to have bettered your position like them because the circs are completely different

I suspect they won’t have as much money as you think, the rental market for small landlords is difficult at the moment with ever increasing costs and legislation.

Then there’s capital gains tax to pay when they want to sell anything.

I love how you know the ins and outs of her property portfolio yet can only guess her age

“We feel financially mistreated by the world economy”

😂😂😂😂

Stop listening to her? 🤷‍♂️

we’re on very friendly terms with our neighbours but wouldn’t have a clue as to their financial position (nor they ours)

I'm a little envious of the generation or two above me financially, but I'm grateful for the good things about not being from those times. You're doing yourself a disservice here by focusing on this so much.

£104k per annum sounds lovely compared to my meagre £12k. But I'm not bitter or jealous of you OP. Know why? Because I'm happy and content with my life and you're clearly not.

I don’t think I would want £1m in mortgages or to be a landlord at the moment. You have a great income and are doing well having investment ISAs and presumably a home so why worry. Presumably your children are much younger so focus on saving and investing for your families future.

You've got an income of £140k pa.

My income is £21k

Give your head a wobble.

Your neighbours took on considerable risk and hard work to enable them to do what they did.

Why are you disgusted by them?

I felt disgusted at her

Why?

A clear case of Count your Blessings

Because she lucked out by being born 20 odd years before me.
I feel everything is just so very difficult now and we won't be able to help our children in the same way.

It amazes me how old some Mumsnetters get before they realise that life isn't fair. Poor people learn this shit at the knee.

I accept I am in a very privileged postion