To feel guilty about letting the repossession company take his car away?

[LegendaryExtra]

I got engaged to my ex after 7 months of dating (short I know).

He told me his Range Rover had a fault and he wanted to return it and get a new one. Since his credit was bad he asked if I could get it in my name while he makes the payments. He gave me time to think about it. I realised without him knowing that he had been in negotiations with a repossession company cos they wanted to take his car away due to some arrears. It seems he had some missed payments but had a payment plan but for some reason they still wanted to take the car away. I never confronted him about this.

a week or two later I found out he had been messsging women on a dating site. He had given two or 3 of them his number even 2 days after he proposed. (opened a thread here which got deleted about it at the time)

Anyway, out of annoyance I reserved a car for him online, an 80k RR. I showed him the reservation. He was over the moon.

The very next day he asked the repossession company to come get his car.

Then a day later I confronted him about the dating site activity. He promised me he was careless and it was just a dormant account and he would delete the app. I swore heaven and earth until I mentioned names of ppl he had been chatting with and quoted conversations.

we have still been in contact but he still says I was unreasonable for allowing them take his car if I knew I wasn't going to go ahead with the purchase of a new one. He is blaming me 100% for this. I do feel a bit guilty cos he's been borrowing his friends car an is so depressed. Am o being unreasonable for feeling guilty?

Well, stop it, for heaven’s sake. And don’t get engaged to someone who likes you for your credit rating after seven months again.

And when he stopped paying for the car in your name, it would have been you they came after, and your credit rating that got screwed. Tell him to get lost and stop being such a baby.

And that if he was better in bed, you might not have done it.

Yes I thought that. I am sure I have read almost exactly the same post on here in recent months/weeks

Nah, he fafo.

Maybe he'll learn a lesson or two.

Realistically though it sounds like he was gonna end up with it getting repossessed though as he'd already defaulted on the payment plan and second chances are not given - I work at a lease company and we need them to clear all arrears in one payment if they do this or we will take the car.

He would probably have missed payments on it at some point. He's an arse and you're well rid.

The question was, "Am I unreasonable for feeling guilty...". Therefore she is being unreasonable because she shouldn't feel guilty.

His finances aren't your problem. Don't get involved , you probably will break up with him in the next few months he's a cheater. His car would have been repossessed anyway he's late with payments! Dont feel bad and don't start financing an £80k car!!,

He’s a total dickhead. Block him, raise your standards and get on with your life. He is a waste of oxygen. Your attitude is worrying though. You should despise him. Maybe get some counselling so that you never allow low life like this near you again.

Of course he wouldn’t 😂 😂
OP , you haven’t just dodged a bullet , you’ve dodged a machine gun spray of bullets my friend !

Good for you. Do you have your own car?

The fact that he had bad credit and still wanted expensive cars would have been enough for me to ditch him, never mind the cheating you found out about later. Someone who can't control their finances is not marriage material.

No one else would feel safe. It's just an arms race.

Thanks to all who voted and for the words of advice and reassurance ladies.

This man proposed quickly because he needed to secure an income from you not a wife ! Don't encourage him any further. He's probably scamming the other women as well to fund his lifestyle.

Ask yourself how he knew your credit score and why.
Look up romance scammers as it sounds like you've just had a brush with one and raise your dating bar

Well played indeed! 😂

Always starts with borrowing smaller amounts and paying back. It builds up trust for when they borrow much more then never pay back.

Stop contact with this user, manipulater and liar.

I don't read how it's your fault at all.
You got together and he was already in a bad place paying for a vehicle.
He's taken (tried) advantage of you.
Try to feel better about yourself, I think you're excellent for doing it!
Don't tolerate bullshit from fuck nuggets and know your worth #Loreal

By staying in contact with him you are playing with fire.

It suggests you need to look at your self-esteem and ability to set safe boundaries for yourself. He couldn't have made the horror show that he was going to turn your life into clearer. But you're still risking getting hooked in again.

That's absolutely hilarious 😂. Don't feel the tiniest bit guilty. It would have been repossessed or goods to the value and I'm sure he'd have had no guilt in giving your things away claiming they were his.

Give yourself a bloody good shake. How can this be your fault? He saw you coming. Do you really think the relationship would've lasted as long as the car? Who do you think was going to pay for the wedding and the honeymoon? Can you not see that you would've been left with an absolute massive bill?

Karma done her job

who told you he's "never been in this position before"?
the lying twatface?😂😂😂

No, you shouldn't feel guilty, for two reasons:-

1. You didn't miss the payments, he did.
2. You can't actually stop them if they have Court authority to take it unless you have the funds to settle the debt (plus costs) .