To not know how school mum does it?

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Mum of 3, works full time (I think) but always looks absolutely FABULOUS and so friendly and outgoing.

i am unorganised and I would love to be more like this.

not sure what I want from this post but just wanted to vent!

I think it’s down to your support system. If school mum was doing it alone then something would have to give.

I know someone like this, she is absolutely lovely, such an interesting person, fun but sensible with three children and working full time in a really excellent job. She and her DH have two sets of grandparents very locally who help out, which helps. But also she just has a naturally lovely personality and is intelligent.

You can bet she'll be dropping balls somewhere along the line! Perhaps her house is a shit tip. At the very least she'll have some really untidy cupboards and I bet she doesn't wash her skirting boards very often.

Unless of course she pays someone else to do it! Maybe she has a fabulous Nanny and a cleaner and ironer etc etc. She is probably in the minority though OP so don't feel bad!

I guess I only see a snippet. She just always looks amazing, great clothes and friendly to everyone but you are right, I don’t see behind close doors

I have come to the conclusion that people like this 'tidy as they go' rather than leaving things to clean up later.

Not only their houses but their lives, their work and their appearances.

I am trying to train myself to become someone who tidies as I go, but it is very difficult.

Some people have lots of energy (lucky them). I watch too much TV!

Some people have more energy, are better at being organised, need less sleep.

Maybe they have more help or more compliant kids, or maybe there’s another ball being dropped, but not always.

Some people are just more capable, just like some people are just better looking or more intelligent 🤷‍♀️

I am a mum to 2 kids primary school age. I always have full face of makeup wear hair extensions and dress well. I get up at 5 in the morning to excercise and once done do all the washing and any tidying that needs doing. Take dogs for a walk and clean hutch in garden. House is always tidy but I do clean as I go and rarely sit on my phone. I get bored sitting down though and I am a morning person. Luckily my partner is more of a night owl so I can be in bed about 9 if I am tired. But I would also hate having to get up on a weekend and have a full house to tidy or even after work I wouldn't have the energy to do it in the afternoon. I do find the more sleep I have the tireder I feel . Everyone is different though some people prefer to save it for their days off and would dread getting up early.

Do people often was skirting boards? And is it considered dropping a ball to not do so?

I genuinely cant think of anything more depressing and boring than washing skirting boards and considering that a day well spent

Im meant to wash my skirting boards?

Iim exhausted reading this.

OP if it's any consolation I'm the school mum running into school late every morning, hair wet, no make up and bedraggled. I'm not even sorry. I don't compare myself to anyone these days or try and pretend I care enough to wear amazig clothes or make up on the school run, your kids adore you for being you.

I look in awe at these mums but I could never even be bothered to do it, I just don't have the time or patience.

Easy going kids, money and a support network

Some people are just actually more capable than others.
I can't stand the posts saying that she'll be dropping a ball somewhere. Maybe she's just got her shit together.

I say this as someone with a slightly less than average level of capability that I've mostly come to terms with.

I absolutely love these threads where people tell us how capable they are. This is not sarcasm btw. I am a fully chaotic karen so I love seeing how the other half live

The only time I wash a skirting board is when I’m moving out. I wiped the bannister the other day on the way upstairs and felt like I’d achieved something pretty profound.

Me also. Some people are just more capable. I am thinking about a full time professional mum of four I know who still has the energy to be on the PTA (I definitely don’t). Or friends with preschool children who work whose houses are immaculate

She might be feeling crap. Not necessarily; but I always make much more of an effort with my appearance when I’m feeling down - a sort of fake it till you make it strategy.

or she might just have more energy! I have a friend who has 3 kids, a dog, a cat, a full time job and a husband who works away a lot. She just has a crazy amount of energy! She does also use a nanny for her youngest and for pick-up.

Following with interest. I wish my life was as organised as that mum.

Don’t feel bad OP. There’s plenty of us xx

I only have 2 DC but worked ft whilst they were at primary school. I looked put together because I was on my way to or from work. As others have said I was up at 5:30 in the week ( 6:30 at the weekend) 5 minutes of planks before shower in the morning, make up on, put apron over the top of it before leaving the house. Present drawer with selotape/ scissors/ neutral paper in it. Always have baking ingredients in so can whip up a cake for a cake sale. Bought boxes of chocs when on offer in November so had teacher's gifts/ raffle prizes etc.I had hundreds of hair bands ,pairs of tights, white ankle socks and polo shirts, I refused to spend anytime looking for those things. I hope I was mostly friendly.

My sister is like this but with 4 kids. 4 classes, 4 WhatsApp groups, about 10 different sports clubs. Very little support system but a great DH. She gets up at 5.30am to work out. She has a well paid high responsibility job. She knows everyone and is always pleasant, she trains for a sports club, is parent class rep in at least one class every year and also occasionally volunteers for a local charity. She also is 100% up to date on current affairs. I've found peace with it over the years but i have struggled with it. She isn't a great cook though, and never bakes whereas I do both a lot, that's about all i got to level the playing field!! She is a ball of energy and crams much more in her day every day than I do or could. I admire and envy it equally.

Don’t worry about it at all. She’s looking at someone else and admiring their great hair/job/marriage. I have a very good friend who, after a few glasses of wine, told me she was jealous because I ‘always seemed to have my shit together’ and all the time I envied her sense of adventure (she had a camper van and would just pile her family in on a whim and go somewhere cool in France). We always want what we think we lack. I know in real life living in a camper van for 2 weeks would drive me mad, and I know that she’d hate my life of boring meetings with dumb people. I’m not sue I even like it 😜

Can I just say for the record that if I meet a mum like this then going to her house and seeing her filthy skirting boards might just make me LOVE HER MORE. What man is ever even thinking that people will judge him on his skirting boards?!

I’m ancient but back in the day I was a minimalist and super organized before Marie Kondo and the woman who invented TOMM had even been born. Plus I am a naturally early riser, and I had a wonderful mother’s help/nanny and a husband who pulled his weight. And no real financial worries.

if any of the above had not been in place I might not have been able to pull it off.

I paid someone to wash mine (do a deep clean which included this) and honestly, it makes such a difference (or at least it did to my house, they were filthy!)

I don't wash my skirting boards but I do dust them!

I was sort of told I am like this recently by another mum. It did surprise me as I think my outer self is very different to my inner self. I am however, super organised, house always tidy and clean, always friendly to everyone and I always volunteer at pre school.

But, I don't work. I just apply my skills from my career to my home life now. I will go back to work soon and then we'll see how even of a keel I manage to keep! We have no support nearby so it's all on us.

I don't look fabulous either. I look fine, clean etc, but I am a leggings and trainers all year round person.