To not know how school mum does it?

[snippysnap234]

Mum of 3, works full time (I think) but always looks absolutely FABULOUS and so friendly and outgoing.

i am unorganised and I would love to be more like this.

not sure what I want from this post but just wanted to vent!

Anyone who goes to work knows that some people are just more effective and have more energy and motivation than others.
Everyone is different.

So having your shit together now means ‘trad wife’? How bitter can you be to say this?

I have a very good friend like this. I don’t think we need to rush to say she’s probably ‘failing’ in some other area of her life.. this particular friend is beautiful, always ‘well groomed’ but not overdone, well dressed, her home is generally super clean if not always totally tidy (she has two young kids and works) and she’s the brightest, friendliest woman you’d hope to meet. Her husband works v long hours and she has v little by way of family support but even so, she inevitably makes the rest of us feel slack 😂
I sometimes think it would be nice to be more like her… then I remember I’ve chronic illnesses and I simply cannot do it all, so I settle for some, my house is kind of tidy, and mostly clean, I look clean and tidy for the most part, my kids are always happy and well presented and I can be friendly and make others feel welcome, no matter the circumstances, and I’m proud of that so 🤷🏼‍♀️ we all just do what we can!

Interesting that the majority of posters who list the things they do before and after school, don’t mention anything about having fun with the DC, apart from ferrying them to and from school/activities.

The ones who don’t specify they are single parents also don’t mention what their partners do around the house. Do they get up at 5am to put laundry on, clean skirting boards, clean out the rabbit?

I think it comes down to standards. If she’s always got up and done her hair and make-up and worn nice clothes then that’s her, that’s just her personality. That doesn’t change when you become a busy Mum. I’d never do the school run in scruffy clothes. If I’m WFH all day in leggings and a tshirt, At 3.10pm I change, put a bit of make-up on, perfume and get ready for the school run, when I come home and start doing the dinner and chores I change back in to leggings. My sisters are the same, as is my Mum. We would always try and glam up a bit if we knew we would see other people.

This made me laugh just because my husband was in a panic a couple months ago because we had company coming to stay and he decided the skirting boards all looked too dirty and would be embarrassed by them. He is the most house proud person I’ve ever met (male or female). He even makes sure all of the rooms smell nice by moving around candles etc as he’s worried the plugins would hurt the cats.

I'm not sure all the "yeah but i bet her house is a shit tip" messages are particularly kind, shes probably just someone who's got her act together.

We could all be a bit more like that really if spent less time on our phones.

Do you have a job out of interest? Not meant in a disparaging way btw as nothing wrong with it if you do, I’m just curious how someone who works keeps up this type of schedule? Is that why you clean in the morning?

I think (well in my case) I didn’t mention having fun with the children because that’s a given, we do game nights, movie nights, park most days, and crafts etc in the week after school because the house is tidy, the food is prepped etc and then means all weekend we are free to go to the beach, cinema, swimming, more parks, bike rides, baking

@happithipoy what does your DH do when you are doing the laundry, tidying, batch cooking?

I have a strong suspicion that these people manage to get their small children to sleep before 10pm. Unlike me 😖

If a woman has had children with another person why would the assumption be she needs to do everything around the house herself?

That makes me a bit sad

What a mean spirited post!

I'm not bringing anyone down. 🤪

I have a friend like this. Lovely people, good fun and also kind and community focused, 4 children, always well behaved, well turned out, house cleaned every day, both parents working full time, living far away from family.

The father admitted to me that behind the scenes they put in a LOT of hard work. No secret!

@peanutbuttertoasty sounds a bit 1950s housewife or indeed something from Mrs Beetons’s book of household management

Well, let’s not assume this perfectly lovely woman is a shitshow behind closed doors to try to feel better about ourselves. Perhaps she’s just lovely, well-dressed, kind and organised. 🤷🏻‍♀️

Exactly. Sometimes people just really work hard because these things are important to them. All power to them, I say. They reap the benefits of their graft.

Hi yes I work full time. So in the morning I walk the kids to school then get back and straight in my car. For example I'm in till 5 today but have done all the washing and cleaned the house sorted pets and excercised. Then I know when I get home later I can do what I like only thing il have to do really is sort tea but then I can chill out.

So anyone with a tidy house who takes care of themselves must be being abused? Again bullshit.

All the OP has said about this woman is that she looks good and is very nice and already half of MN have determined that her house must be a tip and she cries herself to sleep jealous of the OP while the other half have her living in fear of her DH leaving or abusing her.

Ok then.

Maybe she is actually just a very together person.

Some people are just really good at organising. I have a friend like this, she works as a PA and is judt the most organised person I know. I think being highly organised and routine driven is the key. I have not mastered this but aware that is the secret.
Military precision planning, super organisation skills, routines for everything.

I have 3 kids, a husband who does LOADS, a cleaner 2x per week who does all the laundry and ironing to a high standard, plenty of money, work fully remotely (full time in theory)...

And, I still look like I've crawled through a hedge, so do my kids, we are often late and usually also a bit shouty with it. Nails never filed let alone polished, diet and exercise v sporadic (though am quite thin).

Not sure where I am going wrong, but I think I must be the problem.

That made me laugh as I did the exact same ( wipe the bannister!)

Cleaning of the highest order accomplished!

This is such an interesting approach. Thank you! Were you born this way?