Gender swap situation

[TenThousandYears]

I know you're all probably fed up hearing about this subject...I just need to vent.

DD has been friends with "Sally" for 10 years. (Both 14) Since nursery. In the last few months Sally has decided to change gender and now wants to be called " Ron"

DD just can't wrap her head around this. If she slips up, she gets nasty looks from "Ron" and so she's treading on eggshells.

Ron's brother still refers to Ron as Sally so DD is very confused by it all.

I'm on DDs side. Personally, I would hate to be in her shoes right now. I think if you meet someone and are introduced to them as whomever then that's easier to accept than having to change names and pronouns of someone you've been friends with for 10 years. On TV shows people just accept this straight away and move on but I'm not convinced that it's really that easy.

I also think 14 is a bit young for these changes but that's just my personal opinion.

Are me and my child horrible people for not being able to accept this right away?

Being gay means being same sex attracted. It is physically demostrated by which sex arouses you.

On the other hand, trans means what exactly? Demonstrated by what exactly?

Sexuality, hunger and pain are not internal feelings. They are physical sensations that serve a function, urging us to have sex, to fuel our bodies, and to alert us when we are ill or injured. They are not driven by our emotions but by biology. So I don't think your comparison works.

But what are these people actually ‘identifying’ as?

If you have removed the objective meaning of a man being an adult human male by saying that a man is anyone who identifies as a man, what is it that these female people think they are?

And gender ideology can’t exist without sex based stereotypes.

You can only identify as a thing that you are not, so it’s akin to pretending.
I can’t identify as a woman because I am one.
Only a man can be a transwoman. A woman can’t be a transwoman. The only prerequisite for being a transwoman is to be a man.
Only a woman can produce eggs and reproduce when her egg is fertilised by sperm from a man. A transwoman aka a man, can never ever do that.
Trans is a costume.
Humans need to reproduce or we die out. Men can’t reproduce with trans women.
Identity is ultimately meaningless.
So Sally who wants to be Ron is just a fantasy. She will remain biologically Sally until she dies.

It really is.

There are no observable, objective or measurable facts associated with ‘trans’. Therefore it is an ideology.

It is an ideology that requires people to believe the unbelievable and speak words they know to be untrue.

Hence the only way of making people participate is by bullying or making false claims for their sympathy.

Actually, these are all terms for known biochemical responses. They're not just feelings.

Homosexuality doesn’t require me or anyone else to deny reality. Homosexuality doesn’t require me or anyone else to change the meanings of words to pander to someone else’s denials of reality.

Homosexuality has nothing in common with trans. Stop appropriating it.

There's no need for you to have an opinion about the veracity of someone else's condition. You are not their doctor, you are not a scientist.

I’m afraid we do when it involves boys (or 60 yr old men) in teenage girls changing rooms or young autistic or lesbian girls being set on a pathway which starts with a change in name and ‘pronouns’ and in many cases progress into taking testosterone and removing their breasts. Keeping children safe is everyone’s business.

We also have an interest in those men that claim this condition and therefore gain access to a world of women they could have only dreamed of. Especially as so many of them get so furious when we say no.

So have you worked out a failsafe way of telling which man is not going to harm you?

Do share, it could save a lot of women being hurt. Think of all the rapes you could prevent. You could be up for a Nobel prize!!

I disagree that “most people have a gender identity”. The majority of the world’s population has never given a moment’s thought to gender identity. It’s mainly a preoccupation of overprivileged young people who want to feel special, and “neurospicy” and “gluten intolerant” have been overdone.

I'm feeling sad for Sally-Ron and her parents. With a therapist encouraging this. She'll have the best years of her life ruined by an obsession and angst with gender when she should be having fun. She'll have a future of medication and surgeries. If she goes through with it she'll go into menopause 30 years too soon. She'll probably not have a sex life or find it easy to meet an intimate partner. She'll not be able to have a child or breastfeed. She may die early as testosterone is a poison to women. She'll never be male. Her parents will never have grandchildren. It's the end of the line.

So trans is a verb? In this explanation did they enlighten you as to what actions are associated with this word?

See my post upthread. I think it was actually Helen Joyce’s explanation.

Are you aware that there are long term consequences to affirming a child’s belief that they are really the opposite sex? Consequences of serious harm to health and fertility (not to mention mental health which has been found to get worse after medical ‘transition).

Why would you advocate for OP to enable harming a child??

Completely agree that this is serious harm. The psychological damage done to little children when adults pretend they're the opposite sex - as written by a clinical psychologist:
https://www.transgendertrend.com/childhood-social-transition/

And I’m guessing a stint of national service would knock the corners off these snowflakes, eh? 🙄

Honestly, tell us you read the Daily Mail without telling us you read the Daily Mail.

Why do you think National Serice is needed for these usually very mentally unwell children and young people? `Surprised to see you mention it.

They need compassion and therapeutic support to come to terms with the reality of their sexed bodies - and ideally being surrounded by trusted adults safeguarding them from bad faith adults pushing the "born in the wrong body" narrative.

The poster didn't say anything like that. If you have to make up stuff for your point, you don't have a point.

Some sure do, yes. What makes you think they wouldn't?

This is all about control. Children feeling like they don’t have enough control and alighting on something that seems to give it to them, whatever the cost to themselves or others. It used to be anorexia and now it’s transgenderism. Both very harmful, but the difference with transgenderism is that misguided, greedy or grooming adults are actually facilitating and encouraging the harm.

Whatever your view on gender, the fact that “Sally” is clearly wanting to assert control over their friend group and is punishing those who don’t give it to her, is not a good sign. It could be a bit difficult for your daughter for a while, and she doesn’t deserve that, but I suspect that sooner or later some or all of the friend group is going to get very tired of “Sally”’s controlling behaviour.

Ah I see what you mean.

Well I would think that fetishising Muslim and other religious minority women would be universally condemned. Especially by the very people who call women who want to ensure that women retain rights 'right wing bigots'.

Seems anything goes though as long as you utter the magic words 'i am trans'!

I therefore stand corrected.

Ron has it tough? 🤔 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

WTF??

Ron is a self absorbed, attention seeking, drama lama teenager who will quickly lose all her friends if she carries on with this ridiculous nonsense. What on earth are her parents doing about it?

She’ll be telling everyone she identifies as a cat next week. 🤦🏻‍♀️🤷🏻‍♀️

I’d be telling the DD to drop the friendship and focus on her studies for now.

It’s not right wing to understand that a larger percentage of the world’s population is more concerned about secure access to clean water, adequate food and shelter, sanitation and physical safety than the magical genderbending properties of mascara.

Nothing wrong with the gender bending properties of mascara, eye liner, long hair or nail varnish.

I'm old enough to remember when men were able to gender bend without claiming to be women or lesbians and without transgressing reasonable boundaries or believing that wearing makeup made them actual women.

I miss those days.