Meet the Other Phone. Only the apps you allow.

Meet the Other Phone.
Only the apps you allow.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Gender swap situation

831 replies

TenThousandYears · 24/06/2025 10:18

I know you're all probably fed up hearing about this subject...I just need to vent.

DD has been friends with "Sally" for 10 years. (Both 14) Since nursery. In the last few months Sally has decided to change gender and now wants to be called " Ron"

DD just can't wrap her head around this. If she slips up, she gets nasty looks from "Ron" and so she's treading on eggshells.

Ron's brother still refers to Ron as Sally so DD is very confused by it all.

I'm on DDs side. Personally, I would hate to be in her shoes right now. I think if you meet someone and are introduced to them as whomever then that's easier to accept than having to change names and pronouns of someone you've been friends with for 10 years. On TV shows people just accept this straight away and move on but I'm not convinced that it's really that easy.

I also think 14 is a bit young for these changes but that's just my personal opinion.

Are me and my child horrible people for not being able to accept this right away?

OP posts:
TheKeatingFive · 02/07/2025 17:45

It's very long however. But chunked down into more manageable segments.

TheignT · 03/07/2025 09:15

TheKeatingFive · 02/07/2025 13:05

The conversation has moved on in many directions as you may notice if you read the whole thread.

But adds nothing to what the OP was concerned about. If you want to discuss men in women's spaces you could start a thread about that although there are plenty without pushing out a discussion about 2 girls aged 14.

TheignT · 03/07/2025 09:18

SternJoyousBee · 02/07/2025 16:04

A name is one thing but compelling a child to go against everything they know to refer to another child by wrong sex pronouns is controlling.

How often do you use your friends pronouns when you are talking to her. The 14 year old will probably grow out of this phase if people stop making a big deal of it.

TheKeatingFive · 03/07/2025 11:10

TheignT · 03/07/2025 09:15

But adds nothing to what the OP was concerned about. If you want to discuss men in women's spaces you could start a thread about that although there are plenty without pushing out a discussion about 2 girls aged 14.

Perhaps you don't understand posting in a forum. We can talk about what we like within guidelines. Report my post if you think there's a problem with it.

Tandora · 05/07/2025 15:44

Brand new twin study published in Scientific Reports.

Might be of interest @marshmallowpuff

https://www.nature.com/articles/s41598-025-06265-6#:~:text=Based%20on%20a%201%25%20population,genetic%20contribution%20to%20gender%20diversity.

BundleBoogie · 05/07/2025 19:57

TheignT · 02/07/2025 12:57

How is using the name someone chooses an issue for the OPs daughter? Why would anyone have an instinct to force a name on someone against their will?

In my experience lots of tweens or early teens choose a different version of their name or a nickname they like.

Making this a big thing isn't nice for either child.

If you read the thread you would know that the child in question is demanding that OPs DC uses wrong sex pronouns in face to face conversation with said friend. Which, as we all know, is rude.

Maybe just read the thread before jumping to dismiss or contradict everyone on the issues?

New posts on this thread. Refresh page