Am I controlling for asking for these boundaries after birth

[Anonforthisone1]

Genuinely wondering if I am letting my emotions get to me with this. Have spoken briefly to dp about it but am worried I am
going to come across very precious and controlling. I have never really set boundaries before when it comes to birth.

i will be having a high risk csection under general (due to bleeding disorder) in the next few weeks. I am at a much greater risk of having a pph and also needing a transfusion or a hysterectomy so my recovery is up in the air.

i want to make it clear before I go in some boundaries or expectations due to the fact I have no idea what to expect

i would prefer for no pictures to be sent of ds until i am fully awake and have met him. I understand that this could be as little as 1 hour or could be a lot more if I have complications but the thought of everyone seeing him before me makes me really sad.
i dont want any visitors at all in hospital as from past experience i have had people not be considerate after pph etc.
i don’t know when I will be up for visitors so will tell people when I am ready (this could be a few days but it could be weeks) but they have to come to us. I don’t want to be travelling everywhere.

does this sound ok or am I being controlling as I really don’t want to be.

Agree with this. Usually these threads are full of over precious nonsense, but yours is literally just from the health side of things.

I think a message to family and friends expressing that you don't know how you will be after the birth, due to it already being known to be complicated means that they may have to wait for news and visits.

When my niece was born by c-section, she was taken away immediately and a nurse asked me to accompany him. I spent more time with my niece straight after her birth than my sister did. I can see why OP doesn't want pictures until she is awake and able to meet her baby first.

Totally agree with all of the above it’s what you need and tell staff of your boundaries for the hospital too x

Just wanted to thank everyone who commented on this thread

baby was born on Friday and even though I did have a pph and the general and medications have knocked me. I was awake within an hour and a half of him being born (he ended up staying in theatre while I was asleep so dp met him when I went to the observation area anyway as plans changed on the day). Pictures were then sent and we are expecting visitors slowly by the end of the week although I have said that as long as people are ok to come to me I am happy for people to visit once we are home.

all in all everything has gone as good as it could!

That’s a really good outcome!

And massive congratulations on the birth of your son 🎉🎉

Congratulations on the birth of your little one and glad it went ok!

That’s great news! Congratulations mama!!!

Congratulations on the birth of your baby

Congratulations on your lovely new baby! I'm glad everything went well, notwithstanding the pph.