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AIBU?

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Original poster

A 'Wifey' on DH's phone. And its not me.

204 replies

Needsomeadvice2234 · 30/05/2025 22:27

Real simple - snooped on DH phone and found a 'Wifey' saved in his contacts - he called this number unanswered a month ago but no history I can see. I called it and rang out then phoned right back. Like an idiot I hung up. Now I'm thinking I should call and find out who the Hell this is....
I'm feeling very sick and scared and just want to bury my head in the sand because I can't believe this...
I have the number. Do I call and find out or ask him first. I'm shaking.

OP posts:
arcticpandas · 31/05/2025 07:36

I would have liked for him to give a plausible explanation for this. Make him call the number from his phone with you listening in. If he's innocent he shouldn't oppose to this.

steelingmyself · 31/05/2025 07:38

SpunkySquid · 31/05/2025 00:26

Wifey does not just mean woman.

In some areas of the country it definitely does!

“I was speaking to some wifey”
”A wee wifey walked by”
”That wifey in the shop served me” etc

Saying that, if I had saved a wifeys number in my phone, and rang her, I’d know who she was. Strange he’s purporting not to have a clue.

greycross · 31/05/2025 07:41

smallstitch · 31/05/2025 07:27

Is it possible he has just deleted most of the call logs and missed one?

Show quote history

I think this is possible.

I don’t believe that he doesn’t know who it is, if he called them a month ago. Why would you keep a contact you don’t know?

You looked at his phone for a reason.

A number linked to a birthday surprise could have been a reason, but if your birthday was yesterday with no major surprises then that’s looking unlikely,

Itsallsostressful · 31/05/2025 07:42

steelingmyself · 31/05/2025 07:38

In some areas of the country it definitely does!

“I was speaking to some wifey”
”A wee wifey walked by”
”That wifey in the shop served me” etc

Saying that, if I had saved a wifeys number in my phone, and rang her, I’d know who she was. Strange he’s purporting not to have a clue.

Edited
Show quote history

Totally get wifey being used for woman when talking. But can't imagine using it in this context as a phone contact.
Totally agree with you that someone would remember saving it as wifey.

DorothyStorm · 31/05/2025 07:42

Olika · 31/05/2025 03:51

I don’t buy it that he doesn’t know. Of course he knows who that is as he called that number a month ago. Call that number again and speak with the person.

This. He is clearly lying

BunnyLake · 31/05/2025 07:45

MeganM3 · 31/05/2025 01:40

Tbh I find this more suspicious than the original evidence!! A massive hug? Why. Because he felt guilty or wanted to distract you / quieten you? Didn’t know how to respond? So weird.

And the not knowing… please excuse me but how does a number get saved in your phone under wifey without your knowledge? That’s never happened to
me, not once. The number had even been called. And called straight back? This is not someone unknown. He’s lying.

Show quote history

I have names in my contacts who I have no idea who they are, but they have been there for a long time (so could be workmen etc). As this was only a month ago, and is more a nickname than a normal name, it does seem weird he doesn’t recall it. Either way, unless he’s aware of the more Northern use of wifey, it seems a very oddly named contact to have.

OhHellolittleone · 31/05/2025 07:46

Willyoujustbequiet · 31/05/2025 02:03

It absolutely does just mean woman in Geordie/Northumbrian/Scots.

It's roots are Anglo Saxon and it's very common usage up here.

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Yes depending on where he’s from it
could mean woman ‘some old wifey’ type thing.

muggart · 31/05/2025 07:50

if you have free access to his phone i really doubt it is an affair

Blueberry911 · 31/05/2025 07:52

Needsomeadvice2234 · 31/05/2025 00:17

Apparently he has no idea who it is...call log says he called this number with no reply beginning of the month but doesnt remember. Doubt I'll ever get to the truth. Nothing in his behaviour suggests he's cheating but it gave me a horrible shock. My insecurities I will have to work on I know that. Did fess up to looking at his phone and he just gave me a massive hug.

The fact he's pretending he doesn't know who it is is behaviour to suggest he's cheating, don't be daft.

whistlesandbells · 31/05/2025 07:55

I have friend’s numbers in my WhatsApp not even saved as contacts. Each to their own, but saving a number under a name definitely means you know who it is. 😬

Ohgodohgod · 31/05/2025 07:57

2025ismybestyear · 31/05/2025 06:34

Really? 🤨

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Really to which bit?

Itsrainingthankgoodness · 31/05/2025 08:01

muggart · 31/05/2025 07:50

if you have free access to his phone i really doubt it is an affair

Plenty of men who are having an affair allow their wife/ partner free access to their phone.
It's quite normal for them to have a second phone to contact their affair partner. Or use other means of communication.

DorothyStorm · 31/05/2025 08:07

Ohgodohgod · 31/05/2025 07:57

Really to which bit?

Show quote history

Presumably to the bit where you believed him.

Londongirl8922 · 31/05/2025 08:08

Oh my I would be more brutal and get him to call the number in front of me and ask them out right who they are and if he didn’t then you would 100% know that he’s hiding something just with his body language …no way would I be able to share a bed with my husband when he’s got that in his phone

GameOfJones · 31/05/2025 08:10

There is no way he doesn't know the person saved in his own phone as Wifey. I mean, come on. He's the one that has put the contact in there.

AgnesX · 31/05/2025 08:13

Grumpyoldpersonwithcats · 31/05/2025 05:55

You've never been to Glasgow have you?

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Or Aberdeen/north east!

AhBiscuits · 31/05/2025 08:15

He knows who this person is, obviously.
I would be as angry about him.taking me for a fool as anything else.

Holly485 · 31/05/2025 08:22

Instead of you messaging why don't you get him to call the number in front of you on speaker and see what happens.

SENNeeds2 · 31/05/2025 08:24

Is there a chance he called a month ago and got a message or WhatsApp back?
sorry I am wondering if it is an escort service

curlygirlietwirly · 31/05/2025 08:30

Could it be someone’s actual name!?!?
My husband works with people from different cultures and some of them have names that people in my culture might consider “different”, like someone is called memory, another is called praise, etc??

bedtimeblue · 31/05/2025 08:32

Lostworlds · 31/05/2025 07:00

I don’t think I would believe him and I usually like to give people the benefit of the doubt.
The fact the number was saved wifey suggests he knows them. I’ve saved numbers into WhatsApp before and it’s come up with a name- but never a nickname.

I don’t think I would let this go. He’s reacted well but is that just to pacify you and think it’s all innocent.

It's not magic lol... It's saved under the name the person who forwarded you the contact saved you under. So if I were to forward you a contact that I had saved as Big Toe or Love Of My Life and you were to just save it (eg to message or call them straightaway) it would be exactly that in your phone

NatFatPrat · 31/05/2025 08:34

I would not believe his bullshit or be fooled by his massive hug. I wouldn’t have asked him about it first cos now he can contact wifey and let her know you seen her contact in his phone. If it were me, I wouldn’t have called the number and asked why her contact details are stored as ‘wifey’ on his phone.it would have been far more interesting and believable to hear her response.

nomas · 31/05/2025 08:41

Azandme · 31/05/2025 06:39

I have a "Wifey" in my phone contacts - because bloody Google FamilyLink has somehow merged all my dd13's contact list into mine. "Wifey" is one of her best friends.

My brother is also now listed as "Uncle XYZ" and my former DH is "Poppa Bear".

And I have no idea how to fix it 🤦🏼‍♀️🤦🏼‍♀️🤦🏼‍♀️.

This is hilarious.

Are you remarried? I can imagine your DP being confused that your ex husband is saved as Poppa Bear in your phone 🤣

Ohgodohgod · 31/05/2025 08:45

DorothyStorm · 31/05/2025 08:07

Presumably to the bit where you believed him.

Show quote history

After he explained I opened the messages. They were quite obviously what he said they were.
I’ve since realised (going back to the OP) that OP saw a picture of the contact and it wasn’t a burly fella called Pete but a woman. So now I think those saying someone forwarded a number or (at worst) a flirty type put her number in his phone one evening when he was out and called herself so she had his. But I really don’t think a man who is having an affair and I’d secretive enough to delete his affair lady’s number from the call log or only call her one time, ever, from his phone, is going to save her as Wifey in the phone to which his wife has free access. It makes no sense!

TinyGingerCat · 31/05/2025 08:45

Why did you look on his phone in the first place?

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