Child Benefit Rival Claim Ex Partner Earning Loads!!!!! part 2

[ProlongedAffair]

https://www.mumsnet.com/talk/am_i_being_unreasonable/5294980-child-benefit-rival-claim-ex-partner-earning-loads?reply=144269354

I can’t write on the previous thread anymore, so I’ve created this one for people interested in the outcome of the CMS case. I’m committed to telling people what the outcome is regardless of whether it goes my way or not.

You can’t go to court and say this, you can’t blame it on CMS. They go on what you told them, and you told them a lie. Your ex is allowed to challenge the CMS for their decision and you are going to lose.

These scenarios are the only cases where maintenance is given in a 50/50 set up.

OP you also keep bringing up this is about when you were not 50/50, as if he owes you money from that period of time, because he paid £1k when he earned more and now you are trying to recoup it. This is go very badly for you in court, don’t keep on down this road. They will call you out on this tactic you will not win

And incur legal fees.

@alcoholnightmare he was giving her maintenance on 50/50. She took him to CMS to get MORE. And this is the consequence

Surely the CMS have a compensation pot for mistakes they can pay him back from that.

I would be extremely surprised if they do.

Oh Lordy, I remember this OP and am getting major Deja-vu

They didn't make a mistake. YOU LIED TO THEM.

You can lead a horse to water…. 😬

You seem to repeatedly confuse the way you think things should be for fairness and the way they actually are!

The big mistake CMS made was believing your fantasies about you being the primary carer. Somehow I don't think that's on them to pay for.

I think if you start trying to get CMS to pay your ex back, from some nebulous compensation pot, they’re more likely to go after you for your fraudulent claims.

OP it's bonkers you think that CMS will have a pot of money to bail people out when claimants have given wrong info.
Even if you had been 100% accurate and it had been a genuine mistake by CMS, there's never a system where there's a 'compensation pot' - if your employer over paid you, if you were taxed incorrectly, if the bank accidentally put funds into your account - in ALL circumstances you have to pay back money you've received that you weren't entitled to, even if it's a genuine error. The 'allowance' is letting you pay it back at an affordable rate, not writing it off and expecting the magical money tree to provide!

You say your ex isn't being amicable, it sounds like he's actually been extremely amicable, and still is. Don't start trying to play nasty, it could really backfire on you.

You’ve been told before, the website isn’t accurate for 50/50. He owed you nothing. You’ve made your bed, now please, enjoy it. The tit for tat is childish on both sides. You should’ve left it and CMS were wrong to award you.

Did you get any legal advice OP?

I don’t think you can keep challenging anything prior to the 50/50.

Here are the facts ok.

You willingly accepted a private CMS arrangement from your ex when you were primary carer and didn’t have 50/50. You did not take it to CMS.

Some years later you moved to 50/50 and he cut your private arrangement from £1000 to £300, based on that he had the DC equally

You then opened a case against him for more money as you thought he earned a lot. The rationale for this was that you wanted to be compensated from the years before 50/50 when you accepted the private arrangement.

However, that time has passed now and it’s been 50/50 for a while. You are now an equal parent

You want the CMS to uphold this based on what was the case years ago, and not now. But they have a cut off period for a back claim and you have missed it. So you are trying to make a backdated claim underhandedly. To do so you want to prove you were primary carer for years until recently. Am I right?

Because when you opened the claim, you were getting Child Benefit so you met their standard to be "Primary carer". They based their advice on nothing more than your word and the child benefit.

You are no longer getting child benefit for one child so they have changed their view. Based on the change of circs.

Its fair because the advice you got aligned to your circs at that point in time.

Youre saying "its beyond amicable" but this whole time you initiated and pushed. And hes still said, he would sort it out privately. Despite the fact he is likely better off if this continues. For example if hes getting child benefit for your youngest, there will come a time where you might owe him CMS for DC2 but as DC1 is over 18 you get nothing back. He has said it doesnt have to go this way.

I dont understand why you keep having to put your hand in the fire. With every update you give more of us advise you how to limit the damage and you ignore it and say its unfair.

1 time, at 1 point in time CMS agreed you were primary carer. Based on your word and child benefit. And at that time that was accurate. But today he gets child benefit for 1 of the children, HMRC recognises you as 50:50 CMS now disagrees based on new information. Its not "unfair" its a different situation.

Honestly it will be so so so much better if you ring him and ask how he suggests you resolve it

Its not CMSs responsibility if you need to pay it back.

Its like if your employer under taxes you, its not necessarily your fault but its your responsibility to repay the money.

Yeah that pot is for if they bollocksed up, and as a result you had extra costs like overdraft charges. But thats things like, they processed your claim outside their agreed turnaround times, or you can prove you provided info they ignored or didnt act on.

This isnt what happened. CMS didnt make a mistake.

They have acted promptly, based on the info they had at the time. Your circs changed when ExP successfully put in a rival child benefit claim, which shows you were overpaid and his child benefit claim will have potentially been backdated to 12 weeks prior to the date he put the claim in. Youre lucky HMRC aren't also asking for 12 weeks of that back too. CMS couldnt have known he would challenge the child benefit and prove it was 50:50 at each stage they've acted on the most up to date info they had.

If he needs paying back, its not fair to expect the tax payer to cover it. I dont want to pay your ExP back for your greed. You'll have to pay him if it goes that way

Omg op, how many times are you going to say that CMS said you were primary carer?!

Just this information alone is no longer the case. So you need to get over it! You are NOT the primary carer. You have a 50/50 arrangement with your husband and you now only have 1 child benefit claim. Your ex had gone for CMS so that may cancel out your claim.

Can he go for money back? Yes probably.... Should you keeping fighting?.... Definitely not! Should you talk to your ex and arrange things privately like he's asked.... Yes definitely. I don't know why you still think you have a case. You do not. Your ex has won... You were incorrectly told you were primary and have held onto that even though it was incorrect... Let it go.... You have lost ... Now get over it and readjust.

But you lied to them that you were primary carer when you wasn't. You can't exactly provide proof that you had them more than 50/50 as you working it out determined that he had them more than you. So where is your actual proof OP?

Do you remember when you couldn’t believe that your ex would get one of the CBs, because his earnings meant he would pay it back? And we all told you he would, and you kept insisting that would be unfair/illogical? And - lo and behold - he did get it?

Maybe learn from this…?!

Op could you go to mediation now and both agree to drop both cases?
See if he will give you anything at all?

Also, has he now taken over dentist doctor homework shoe shopping haircuts etc for 'his' child?

Have you forgotten that children are involved here? Or do you not care?

Your ex offered to do this amicably despite you spitefully trying to claim more of his income because you 'believe' you're owed it.

You are the poster child for cutting you nose to spite your face and you are so delusional despite people (too kindly in many instances) gently explaining how wrong you are.

Also one last time, if you answer a tick box saying 'are you the primary caregiver' with yes, THAT is the one reason they label you as such. It's clear you are no longer that. Spend this energy on finding additional income sources to boost your own finances, stop trying to steal your exes.

Just to reiterate something I said at least 3 times on the old thread..

CMS has NO investigative branch. They rely on the accuracy of the info given. So when you told them you got child benefit and were the primary parent.. they accepted that from you. Them saying it was NOT a value judgement on the accuracy of the position.

I would like to say to you fair play for coming back to update the thread. You got a lot of stick (reasonably in my opinion) but I do respect you for coming back to update.

I also do have a degree of sympathy for the position that historically it has been far from 50/50 but you really need to let that go now. All that matters is the present. And you absolutely can't win at Tribunal.

If there is a prospect of out of court settlement you should really try for that.