Did I ruin family day out

[Prinajdjd]

DH, dc and I had just enjoyed a lovely meal and talking about future plans. We were on great terms and had a wonderful day. When we was driving home, we decided we didn’t want the day to end and would find something else to do. As we were driving DH asked for a tissue for his hands. I was distracted talking to dd and placed a handful of them gently on his knee. They fell down by his foot. He suddenly got angry saying “why would I do that? I should’ve placed them in his hand.” I apologised and said it wasn’t a big deal. He then picked them up, crumbled them together and when I looked in his direction threw them in my face hitting my eye. Even if it was meant playful (which it wasn’t due to the sheer amount of force and his tone prior to this), it really hurt my eye and I was upset about it. Dd even saw and demanded for daddy to apologise to mommy. I said instead I wanted to go home and he blamed me for ruining the day over something minor. It rubbed me wrong as he shouldn’t have thrown it at me at all, definitely not in front of kids and he shouldn’t have done it so hard. He keeps coming in the room and asking is this how I’m going to act- I say no I am no longer upset about this and if he apologises we can continue the day. He has stormed out now and refuses to help with dc. So confused and don’t see how this is my fault.

It's not your fault. He's a dick.

This isn’t normal behaviour. Is it the first time he’s done something like this?

Yes. I was so confused why he would do something so aggressive. He is argumentative but never violent.

Who was driving, was he? It can be annoying and worrying if something falls down by the pedals when you are driving, especially at speed

Yes he was. It was an accident. Imo even if he was annoyed he shouldn’t of throw them at me.

He shouldn't have thrown them at you OP.
He shouldn't be throwing anything at you.
That is really aggressive behaviour and a big over reaction, even if he was driving .

How is your eye now OP?

Maybe he panicked about them being down near the pedals while he was trying to concentrate on the road. If his foot had slipped on them he could have caused an accident.

Not an excuse to throw them at you but it all seems like a lot of drama over not very much at all, really.

How can balled up tissue even hurt?

A tissue hurt your eye 🤣

He sounds weirdly aggressive and rude. Why does he talk to you and act this way? It's not acceptable. He needs to apologise and never do anything similar again.

Woahhhhh that’s an overreaction on his behalf.

And abusive as a response too.

Is this totally out of character or just the first time you’ve been hurt?

Im thinking that myself lol. But it did. My eye was open you get it?

This is what I was thinking? Were they menthol?

This is abuse and gas lighting

I'm struggling to understand the level of sheer force and damage that can be done by tissues?

Considered many possibilities but nothing that could tally with your post.

I think you are both being absolutely ridiculous.

A tissue hurt your eye? He got angry that you didn’t put it in his hand?

Alarm bells ring when men blow up over minor things.

Not annoying enough to warrant angrily throwing the item in your wife’s face. In front of your kids.

If this is all out of character, why can’t you just sit down together and explain how you’re feeling. Doubling down and expecting apologies won’t help.

Does he know your eye was hurt? Might you have mis-read the aggression? You need to explain to each other calmly why you are upset, and listen to what the other has to say.

I don't know why everyone is doubting that the tissues hurt OP's eye.
Even an eyelash or a small piece of grit can be painful in the eye.
So a ball of scrunched up tissues thrown with force into an open eye at close range could very well be painful.

But the main issue is that OP's H thought it was acceptable to throw something into his wife's face at all!

Id suggest a more practical approach. Ball up some tissue and chuck it in your eye.

We on its own it all seems a bit of an.over reaction.

Very odd and potentially dangerous to balance tissues on his knee when driving.

Aggressive throwing tissues at you in response. But they were tissues so hardly likely to cause injury.

Do you.often have these little spats over very little.

I don’t understand how to two compare though. On the one hand, I placed tissues on his knee which accidentally fell. He purposefully scrunched them up and chucked then in my face after having a go at me in front of the kids. Would this classify as little in your marriage?

I still can't get it.
He asked got a tissue.
You left them on his knee.
Not very practical when driving (do you drive?)
They fell.
He asked "why would you do that?' (Fairly reasonable question)
He somehow managed to pick them up and make them into a forceful weapon (while driving safe given the weight of the tiisue this is some achievement)
You both made it into a indecent which was unpleasant for your child.
You need decide you wanted to go home (over an issue with a tissue)

It all seems rather dramatic and could have been sorted in 30 seconds.

This. And then has continued blaming op and is acting rude and aggressive since then.

So many red flags.

Even if he was initially annoyed and worried about the tissues near the pedals, he's had plenty of time to calm down, take responsibility for overreacting in the moment, and apologise.