Parents come to stay, but then bugger off out

[Lovemelovemydogz]

Would this bother you.

See my parents maybe 3 x per year, due to distance. My Dc had a party today, so Dh took her so I could stay home with my parents, who then proceeded to go out for a two hour walk, so i’m sat in the house alone, when I could’ve gone to the party and caught up with friends.
It’s the same if we decide to have a day at home if Dd is tired, they go out and don’t really spend time with us.

Aibu to be a bit put out by it?

I guess what it boils down to is that if I was staying at someone's house and they decided not to get dressed and to sit in their pajamas on the sofa, I'd feel pretty awkward and like I was just an inconvenience.

Only OP knows whether her parents fall into that category or not.

Ah you’re one of those! Telling OP she should be spending as much quality time with her parents, when you yourself wouldn’t even host your own parents for two weeks! Gotcha 😉

Are the imaginary activities as imaginary as the imaginary hosting? Have another medal for the ‘do as I say, not as I do’ advice 🤣

So why didn't anyone on either side communicate with each other to establish what everyone wanted/would prefer to do?

Blimey, you really are quite bonkers!

You were in your pyjamas on Good Friday afternoon?
No wonder they decided to do something off their own bat. You're hardly enthusiastic company

Because that would be sensible.

Exactly. Fair enough if you're sick or on your own, but when you're hosting it's polite to at least make the effort and offer to do something.

For pointing out you keep changing your tune? Thanks!

My dad and his wife would totally do something like this. I used to be offended, but I don't it's really justified. They spend a lot of time with us already, but if we aren't doing anything in particular they'll do their own thing.

I think the main problem is communicating expectations. You should discuss the plans together and be honest about what you want to do. In this situation I would talked to the about the party and ask what they wanted to do that afternoon. Your 3 going to the party and everyone meeting afterwards for dinner would have been completely fine.

They probably get bored. If I had guests I would have suggested going out myself.

What time of day were you still in your PJ’s at? This isn’t really ok unless you are depressed, sick or have imminently given birth etc. I usually get changed into my PJ’s after 6pm if not going out but wouldn’t dream sitting around in PJ’s but then I get changed as soon as I get up to take our dog out.

I wouldn’t want to be sat in the house in front of the TV during the day with no exercise or daylight for hours with you sat in PJ’s. I would be bored and uncomfortable with this.

If it was me I would have got dressed first thing. I would have also said the night before DD has a party tomorrow, normally we all go along but DH has offered to take her so I can spend sometime with you. Would you like to do something in the morning whilst they are out (we can all go for a walk if you fancy, go into town, grab a coffee etc etc.

you should have asked at breakfast: “DD has a party today from 2 to 4 pm. DH will take her, it’s 30 minutes drive so we will be without car. Mum and Dad what are you fancy doing while DD is at the party?” And then go from there.

It IS a bit weird to sit watching telly in the daytime when you have guests visiting, even if they are your parents.

It IS a bit weird to sit watching telly in the daytime when you have guests visiting, even if they are your parents.

It IS a bit weird to sit watching telly in the daytime when you have guests visiting, even if they are your parents.

It IS a bit weird to sit watching telly in the daytime when you have guests visiting, even if they are your parents.

I think that’s what most people do inbetween any outings

When I stay at anyones house I need daily breaks, especially if it’s a long stay like that. It’s nice they gave you some space. It makes the time you do spend together more pleasant

Dad might have been bored, had cabin fever so wanted some fresh air. Your mum accompanied him.

In your PJ's? Really?

I'm probably odd then.

I rarely put the telly on in the daytime.

Did you not say ‘give me 5 minutes to get dressed and I’ll come with you’

Doesn’t sound like OP was given the chance, the mum just abandoned the series she had supposedly been waiting for and walked out.

Watching telly during the day? On Good Friday? In your pyjamas? Shame on you OP.

can I come and visit you?