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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Trans people

999 replies

Mog65 · 17/04/2025 16:46

Firstly, I'm a trans ally

Everyone is up in arms about trans women. What seems to be forgotten these people are human beings. Where is humanity. You have probably been sharing toilets and coming into contact with trans women every day and have no idea. You only hear about the few bad ones. In a public toilet, you go into a cubical and pee. Its not like you're sat there in full public view with your knickers at your ankles.

What has been forgotten also, as many females are changing to. So trans men. So you're in hospital in a ward. The woman in the next bed, identifys as George, clit is now a penis fully working and you're in the next bed! Same person can wander around female only spaces as the law has changed. George can now only be searched by a female. By the way George a transgender man is a pervert! All hypothetical but nobody has brought this up.

Just a thought.

OP posts:
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heroinechic · 17/04/2025 17:39

I’m seeing a lot of trans men on tiktok today talking about how they will now be using the women’s toilets (as they are biologically female) in support of trans women (who they feel are the real target in this). There is almost a gleeful undertone that this will make women feel uncomfortable as they “pass” as men. I genuinely wouldn’t know that they weren’t biological men if they weren’t disclosing it. They are also highlighting that now anyone that looks like a man can enter women’s toilets and claim they are a trans man but biologically female.

How will women in women’s refuges feel about a biological woman who appears as a man sharing their space?

TheGoogleMum · 17/04/2025 17:39

When the OP said "fully working penis" I realised he/she was misinformed on this subject

MagpiePi · 17/04/2025 17:40

Oh look…a goady OP and then nothing…

Helen483 · 17/04/2025 17:40

DrSpartacularsMagnificentOctopus · 17/04/2025 16:56

Have you actually seen a phalloplasty?

You know that women don't pre out of their clitorises, right?

Metoidioplasty is the operation you're looking for (where the clit and surrounding tissues is used to create a phallus) - but still not a fully working penis.

I've learned more than I intended to today! 🤣🤣🤣

JandamiHash · 17/04/2025 17:40

No matter what you say TW will always be men

I have no issue at all with George the trans man being in my space because George is a woman, and therefore poses practically no risk to me. I also enormously dispute the “fully working penis”. Wether people have mutated their own body parts is irrelevant- George is just a woman who had surgery

I support trans people living free of discrimination and hate. But to state their sex isn’t discrimination or hateful it’s just objective fact. They still have a place in the world.

proximalhumerous · 17/04/2025 17:42

So before you transitioned to identify as an alley, were you a pathway? A ginnel? Maybe a snicket?

No, I don't think anyone has forgotten that trans-women are people, and I highly doubt that your highly erudite post has raised any hitherto unexpressed thoughts on this topic.

Bollindger · 17/04/2025 17:42

George has no way to make sperm, the main function of a penis. If her womb has been removed , then George will never carry a child, but could use stored eggs and a borrowed womb to have a child.
Georgina could have stored his sperm before removing his penis and become a father, but can never carry a child himself...
So with these 2 people unless a 3rd party is involved both will remain childless .
George remains a woman, Georgina remains a man.

LittleBigHead · 17/04/2025 17:42

clit is now a penis fully working

In your dreams @Mog65 . Because it's never gonna happen IRL - but how sweet of you to share your fantasy with us.

BiologicalRobot · 17/04/2025 17:43

You really have no idea about any of it do you? No thought or compassion or reasoning has happened inside that head of yours 😮

I highly recommend you read about the historical reasons behind single sex prisons and toilets and why they came about.

SporadicMincePieMuncher · 17/04/2025 17:43

ohdelay · 17/04/2025 17:35

Wrong. I am genuinely worried about the education of anyone who has been through school in the last 10 years. To date no functional (for sex or even urination) penises have been made from any other body parts. Emphasis on the functional. What they are doing is the equivalent of "is it cake". Usually it is pretty obvious that it isn't cake.

I'm not sure I want to know the answer to this but I'll ask...
Have I got this right - to date, no phalloplasty performed on a female bodied person has produced a structure that functions as a thing to urinate from?

That's absolutely fucking tragic and it's barbaric to put people through that.

Lark1ane · 17/04/2025 17:43

oncemoreuntothebeachdearfriends · 17/04/2025 17:33

So how do they make imitation bollocks?
Asking for a friend.

Apparently you can re use those plastic things in Kinder eggs.
It says so on Reddit. So must be true.

Gloriia · 17/04/2025 17:44

Galaxybisc · 17/04/2025 17:28

So pleased that sanity has prevailed. I think most people are accepting of the fact that everyone is different and people can dress how they like.

You can’t change biological sex however. You’re either male or female and men should not be allowed into female safe spaces. End of.

As to the surgeons performing surgery to ‘transition’ people, I think that’s hugely questionable. Just like the Doctors giving hormones to teenagers.

This.

Dress as you like just don't expect others to go along with your delusions regarding changing sex.

Every Dr who has mutilated healthy bodies to go along with the dysphoria should be instructed to stop practising imo.

NotbloodyGivingupYet · 17/04/2025 17:44

It's a funny thing. I've read and heard the word "transman" more often since 10.30 the other morning than I had in the previous ten years.
I wonder what's changed?

JazzyJelly · 17/04/2025 17:44

LittleBigHead · 17/04/2025 17:42

clit is now a penis fully working

In your dreams @Mog65 . Because it's never gonna happen IRL - but how sweet of you to share your fantasy with us.

It's really sad how some people have been deceived into thinking humans can actually change sex. Very cruel.

MummytoE · 17/04/2025 17:45

Mog65 · 17/04/2025 16:53

The clitoris is used in the making of the penis.

Absolute fantasy

ClimbOnFriend · 17/04/2025 17:45

heroinechic · 17/04/2025 17:39

I’m seeing a lot of trans men on tiktok today talking about how they will now be using the women’s toilets (as they are biologically female) in support of trans women (who they feel are the real target in this). There is almost a gleeful undertone that this will make women feel uncomfortable as they “pass” as men. I genuinely wouldn’t know that they weren’t biological men if they weren’t disclosing it. They are also highlighting that now anyone that looks like a man can enter women’s toilets and claim they are a trans man but biologically female.

How will women in women’s refuges feel about a biological woman who appears as a man sharing their space?

This is good news, everyone should be using the space matching their sex if they weren’t already. Transmen are not a threat to women in the same way that men or transwomen are. We are long past the days where girls wear pink and boys wear blue. Women can be masculine if they like and that’s great, it doesn’t make them men.

EdithStourton · 17/04/2025 17:45

It's always good to be lectured about something that you have thought about very very hard for literally YEARS.

And FYI, OP, I know trans people. I don't wish any of them ill.

I just don't want the rights of women and girls trodden into the mud, thanx.

SpidersAreShitheads · 17/04/2025 17:46

What would be really fucking nice is, just for a change, trans-identifying individuals and their allies showed a tiny shred of concern for women.

There are many, many, many GC women who repeatedly acknowledge that of course trans-identifying people deserve to be safe and protected. Many of us may even show sympathy for trans-identifying individuals who find themselves in a difficult position. But I never hear the reverse being acknowledged by the trans community. There's never any acknowledgement that some trans women are a threat to women.

Women are not a shield for male violence. By letting in one perfectly lovely person with a penis, you have to hold the door open for the rest.

And the problem with that is that there's an even higher incidence of sex offenders among the trans community compared to the male population. In other words, allowing trans-identifying men into single-sex spaces puts women at risk.

No one in the trans community seems to give a shit about that. Women's safety is brushed aside as an inconvenience, an annoyance.

Karen White. Barbie Kardashian. Isla Bryson. Lexi Secker. All of these names are transwomen who have raped/killed/attacked women. I could go on. There's a bloody long list.

Even setting aside the issues of privacy and dignity for women, allowing transwomen into our spaces puts us at risk. And that's just not acceptable.

Maybe some of the TRAs could start acknowledging this rather than just shouting at us for being bigots when actually, the stats show that we have very good reason to want to keep male bodies out - however they identify.

Incidentally, "George" doesn't present a threat to women. George doesn't have the power, strength, size etc of a biological man, or a functioning penis to rape women with.

Oryx54321 · 17/04/2025 17:46

heroinechic · 17/04/2025 17:39

I’m seeing a lot of trans men on tiktok today talking about how they will now be using the women’s toilets (as they are biologically female) in support of trans women (who they feel are the real target in this). There is almost a gleeful undertone that this will make women feel uncomfortable as they “pass” as men. I genuinely wouldn’t know that they weren’t biological men if they weren’t disclosing it. They are also highlighting that now anyone that looks like a man can enter women’s toilets and claim they are a trans man but biologically female.

How will women in women’s refuges feel about a biological woman who appears as a man sharing their space?

This comment shows the trans community for exactly who they are - people who hate real, “cis” women.

MummytoE · 17/04/2025 17:46

You sound very young and immature in this btw

Naunet · 17/04/2025 17:49

Oh well, if only they'd shown women some humanity, they wouldnt be in this mess.

MyUmberSeal · 17/04/2025 17:49

Oryx54321 · 17/04/2025 17:46

This comment shows the trans community for exactly who they are - people who hate real, “cis” women.

They do!! Because for the most part, they are pissed off and bitter that they aren’t one. A real woman, I should say.

Gloriia · 17/04/2025 17:49

Oryx54321 · 17/04/2025 17:46

This comment shows the trans community for exactly who they are - people who hate real, “cis” women.

Exactly.

Surely transmen would be of better use in the mens toilets protecting the transidentifued women from the threat that they feel they face . Maybe they could organise some kind of buddy scheme?

Panama2 · 17/04/2025 17:50

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

viques · 17/04/2025 17:51

BrilliantBrilliant · 17/04/2025 17:21

Maybe they identity as an alley or a cul de sac. As long as they don't start telling me I'm not an avenue but a cis avenue and invade my space then get on with it.
Trouble is the alleys keep telling the avenues and cul de sacs what we need to do , what to call them, what to call ourself. Batshite all of it.

Edited

The only cul de sacs in this discussion are the neo “vagina” pouches made from inside out penises that have to be manually cleaned ( no, I don’t know how, probably Lakeland has a gadget) because unlike a real vagina they are not self lubricating, and moreover have to be regularly dilated to stop them closing up and trying to heal.

Making viable pretend sex organs from spare pieces of flesh is currently on a very basic level, maybe this is something Elon Musk could turn his mind to.