First Mother’s Day - DH didn’t put anything on socials

[Genie98]

AIBU to be a bit gutted that my DH didn’t put a post up on socials yesterday to mark my first Mother’s Day? My feeds were full of other posts celebrating their Mum’s and I was hoping DH would have done something to mark the occasion. He has done the odd birthday post in the past and posted about our engagement/wedding etc so it’s not that he has never used it.

Just feeling a bit deflated and a bit jealous of my mum friends who had lovely messages and photo’s from their OH’s.

Dear god, and you are still not happy? You are not even his mother!

As he rightly should be. Not sure why you are 'gutted' about it though.

Can we please learn to enjoy our lives?

I was taken out for lunch and received chocolates. My DH did not post on socials. I did not post on socials. The world did not stop spinning on its axis.

Why does everything have to be so performative? What are we trying to prove to everyone? That we are loved? That we are fertile? That we have disposable income? What?

This is a you problem, not a DH problem.

He would be. Please get a grip and grow up.

How vacuous. It's not enough to actually be loved and appreciated: the fact has to be published for the world to see.

So your hubby didn't post your roast on his stories on his socials?

Thoughts and prayers, mate, 🙏thoughts and prayers.

Ye gods, what does it matter? Do you care more about what people think your relationship is like rather than how it actually is?

My partner isn’t on socials at all. I post sparingly. Because it doesn’t matter. My motto is the more gushing/ posting on any kind of social media the more likely the couple are to divorce. Plus it’s all so obviously fake!

You need to give your head a wobble and find another means of self-validation.

Totally agree with this. Why is it important? Your DH sounds like he made an effort … seriously you need to grow up.

Yesterday my DDs and little Granddaughters came to spend mother's day with me. It was lovely. We went for a walk, and as we approached my house on the way back, my neighbour, the same age as my daughter, was getting out of her car and waved to us.

She lost her mum at 25. I felt so bad for her seeing us all together for mother's day, when she no longer has her mum.

So yes, posting smug mothers day posts or expecting one's partner to do it for you, strikes me as pretty insensitive.

Your husband isn't your child, why would he wish you a happy mothers day? Sounds like he was wonderful to you though which is lovely.
You're being utterly ridiculous.

Don’t be a tit. Be glad your husband isn’t a performative prat that posts on ‘socials’ for attention.

You have a choice here - you can say “I can’t help how I feel” and tell yourself it’s valid to feel like the victim, wallow and spoil a lovely day - and continue this behaviour for all future special events that don’t go how you’d hoped.
OR you can give yourself a pep talk that what you got was lovely, accept it’s a silly feeling to take away from the day, and work on not spoiling future days.

That is within your control.

Are you also the mother of your husband? If you're not his mother then why would he mention it?

Usually my friends posting ‘perfect’ mums messages/ pictures are the ones with shit marriages and poor mum relationships behind closed doors.

SM is never your b side images

Are you that shallow that you run your life through SM and place more importance on that than reality.

Your husband made a good effort, you had a nice day but you’re actually upset about his lack of social media uploading.

For goodness sake grow up and step away from SM if it dominates your life this much. It’s just not healthy.

Oh ffs. Don’t be so silly! Cba to read the whole thread, but the OP is absolutely ridiculous.

You’re aware that a lot of people playing happy families on social media are likely anything but? It’s all for show, for people you don’t really know and who definitely don’t care about you or your family.

I once went on a date with a man who, unbeknownst to me, had a girlfriend. I woke up one morning to an effusive instagram
post about how amazing his girlfriend was! also showing off the flowers, fancy hotel they’d stayed in that night etc. Shortly after posting this, he messaged me to arrange another date. Obviously I told him where to go! But it’s all smoke and mirrors.

please try hard not to pass on this social media obsession to your children. It’s extremely unhealthy.

Exactly my thoughts! These 2 should run off into the sunset together! 😂

I’m so glad I don’t live my life through SM validation.

The curse of Instagram. It’s made a lot of people very dissatisfied. Can’t you just be thankful for what you know you’ve got. Why is the validation of randoms needed?

Yup! But don’t dare suggest any of them are bs or you’ll be deleted!

Did your friends who got a mention on socials got everything you did in real life? and did they feel appreciated on the day, or was it (like in a lot of cases) just a meaningless gesture to make other people think you have such a wonderful relationship.

You are being absolutely bloody ridiculous, you could mention it to him going forward that it is important to you, but then he will only post because you want him to, not because he wants to.. but why can't you just be happy with the way he wants to celebrate you on mothers day.

I couldn’t even be arsed to read the whole post. Is there anything or anyone more tedious than those that don’t believe their life is actually real unless it’s confirmed on some form of SM.

To be honest op I think it’s sad aswell to be upset about that. You don’t need public validation ! It sounds like he gave you a lovely day, is that not enough ?
my dh forgot again, and of course that means my young children did, I went into the shop and got my own flowers out of our joint account (which I loved because I chose) and dh then took us for a nice pub roast. Happy with that.