Mother’s Day disappointment aibu

[genderguessesplz]

i have a daughter age 2, and am 14 weeks pregnant with baby 2.

All week I’ve seen a gift bag in the dining room that says happy Mother’s Day on it, I was really looking forward to seeing what daddy and my toddler might have picked for me.

i opened a mug that says mum, I am known as mummy as my daughter is only tiny. My husband told me his sister had bought it had got it to him, so he didn’t even choose it

I feel sad that my husband didn’t do it and I’ve put the mug in a charity bag as I don’t want a Mother’s Day gift from my sister in law. Only my child or husband

am I being unreasonable here.

Say nothing! Why would you? Don’t argue with your SIL, if it’s your husband you’re angry with!

My husband has bought chocolates (which I do appreciate), I’ve seen them in the cupboard (the children are too young to buy them themselves) but they haven’t given me them or said anything about Mother’s Day. He is aware that it is Mother’s Day today as he made a comment about it but no happy Mother’s Day.
it is now almost bedtime so doesn’t seem like I will be getting them now and I am starting to feel upset. Was ok up until now but the lack of acknowledgment at all and not even being bothered to hand me something he made the effort to buy is making me feel down. I feel pathetic feeling this way but can’t help it.

Yep - MN is so so weird about Mother’s Day. If this was your birthday, and he got you a shitty mug with your name spelled wrong, bought by his sister, people would be saying LTB and all sorts. He’s been shit and you should definitely match his energy for Father’s Day (I.e. not a lot)

They’re sort of irresistible because you just know what they’ll say!

Get over it OP, at least you got a mug.

And I think you’re equally ridiculous to miss the obvious gaslighting, and yes, telling someone their feelings are ridiculous and grabby and everything else that’s been said or implied is gaslighting. His bar was below the level of the floor for effort and you’re all telling her she’s the problem.

it’s akin to telling women how WONDERFUL a man is if he changes a sodding nappy.

Gaslighting.

People - if the DD picked out the mug in the shop then of course she’s unreasonable to bin it.

The nursery staff put more effort in to helping the 2 year old celebrate her mum than her own partner did!! People need to raise the bar. While the kids are too little to organise stuff then their parents need to step up. This guy was lazy and unbothered.

But it’s as petulant as hell to charity shop the mug.. I mean come on! It’s

You clearly don't think YABU so why ask in the first place?

And as for suggesting. Another man picking up the mug from the charity shop is yhd OP possibly doing another woman a disservice? Are you on crack? In what universe would it be her fault? Why would a man’s actions be her fault?

Good god.

The meaning of gaslighting.

I don’t think it’s gaslighting,

Op save this mug for father's day present to him like a poster suggested. Maybe you can cross mum with a marker and add Dad.

reading that I think you’ve had too much Mother’s Day Prosecco! Ease up, it’s a school day tomorrow.

And this detracts from his complete and utter lack of effort how, exactly?

it doesn’t.

No Prosecco for me.

You are the one who ridiculously suggested her charity shopping said item could do another woman a disservice.

This is brilliant.

And yet you took the time to open it and post a comment.

Ok.

You can’t help it if your comprehension skills are somewhat limited.

It's thoughtless and probably a marker. Disappointing, unacceptable and lazy.

I feel for you. At least you've got a mug. I've got a card only because my husband could sense how angry I could be by the end of the morning. If I carried the day as usual, I doubt he would even take any action. It's my first Mother's Day and I don't even feel special at all.

Gaslighted strikes back again. @spicemaiden did you really have too much prosecco on mother's day?

But that’s because I’m on “crack” apparently! Nice!

Maybe OP should be grateful to her SIL for trying to do something nice for her rather than throwing a tantrum. It's okay for OP to be annoyed with her DH for not buying her a mother's day present himself, but her SIL doesn't deserve to have her thoughtfulness thrown back in her face. Given the endless sniping about in-laws that goes on on here, in this case we seem to have a SIL who wanted to ensure the OP felt recognised on mother's day, perhaps because she knew her brother was a bit useless and was likely to leave the occasion completely unmarked. She wasn't under any obligation to buy anything for the OP but she chose to do a kind thing anyway.
As for your other point, I pick out presents and cards to give to my lovely MIL which come jointly from my husband and I. This is partly because I know what MIL will like better than my husband and partly because my own mother passed away a few years ago so it's nice for me to celebrate the closest thing I have to a mum now. This was my first mother's day as a mum myself so I picked out grandma gifts and cards for MIL for mother's day as I knew that would mean so much to her as she's loving being a grandma for the first time, is that weird too? Are the gifts and card meaningless because our 11-week-old didn't pick them out herself?
I got a lovely card and present from our perfect baby girl too, should I be offended that her daddy gave her a bit of help writing the card?

Whilst you are accusing PPs of psychologically abusing the OP! 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

Yes, I’m afraid you are being ridiculous and ungrateful.

" Hi sil thank you so much for thinking of me and getting the mug off little girl to give me today. Hope you have had a lovely day"

Sil did a lovely thing. She was thoughtful. Don't let your disappointment with your husband take away from that